MedWorm.com provides a medical RSS filtering service. Over 6000 RSS medical sources are combined and output via different filters. This feed contains the latest items from the 'Getting Past Gambling' source. Sat, 06 Sep 2008 13:12:50 +0100 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2008/08/enough.html A time comes in your life when you finally get it... When in the midst of all your fears and insanity you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere the voice inside your head cries out - ENOUGH! Enough fighting and crying or struggling to hold on. And, like a child quieting down after a blind tantrum, your sobs begin to subside, you shudder once or twice, you blink back your tears and through a mantle of wet lashes you begin to look at the world through new eyes. This is your awakening. You realize that it's time to stop hoping and waiting for something to change or for happiness, safety and security to come galloping over the next horizon. You come to terms with the fact that he is not Prince Charming and you are not Cinderella and that in the real world there aren't always fairytale endings (or beginnings for that matter) and that any guarantee of "happily ever after" must begin with you and in the process a sense of serenity is born of acceptance. You awaken to the fact that you are not perfect and that not everyone will always love, appreciate or approve of who or what you are... and that's OK. (They are entitled to their own views and opinions.) And you learn the importance of loving and championing yourself and in the process a sense of new found confidence is born of self-approval. You stop bitching and blaming other people for the things they did to you (or didn't do for you) and you learn that the only thing you can really count on is the unexpected. You learn that people don't always say what they mean or mean what they say and that not everyone will always be there for you and that it's not always about you. So, you learn to stand on your own and to take care of yourself and in the process a sense of safety & security is born of self-reliance. You stop judging and pointing fingers and you begin to accept people as they are and to overlook their shortcomings and human frailties and in the process a sense of peace & contentment is born of forgiveness. You realize that much of the way you view yourself, and the world around you, is as a result of all the messages and opinions that have been ingrained into your psyche. And you begin to sift through all the crap you've been fed about how you should behave, how you should look and how much you should weigh,what you should wear and where you should shop and what you should drive,how and where you should live, and what you should do for a living, who you should sleep with, who you should marry and what you should expect of a marriage, the importance of having and raising children or what you owe your parents. You learn to open up to new worlds and different points of view. And you begin reassessing and redefining who you are what you really stand for. You learn the difference between wanting and needing and you begin to discard the doctrines and values you've outgrown, or should never have bought into to begin with and in the process you learn to go with your instincts. You learn that it is truly in giving that we receive. And that there is power and glory in creating and contributing and you stop maneuvering through life merely as a "consumer" looking for your next fix. You learn that principles such as honesty and integrity are not the outdated ideals of a bygone era but the mortar that holds together the foundation upon which you must build a life. You learn that you don't know everything, it's not your job to save the world and that you can't teach a pig to sing. You learn to distinguish between guilt and responsibility and the importance of setting boundaries and learning to say NO. You learn that the only cross to bear is the one you choose to carry and that martyrs get burned at the stake. Then you learn about love. Romantic love and familial love. How to love, how much to give in love, when to stop giving and when to walk away. You learn not to project your needs or your feelings onto a relationship. You learn that you will not be, more beautiful, more intelligent, more lovable or important because of the man on your arm or the child that bears your name. You learn to look at relationships as they really are and not as you would have them be. You stop trying to control people, situations and outcomes. You learn that just as people grow and change, so it is with love.... and you learn that you don't have the right to demand love on your terms... just to make you happy. And, you learn that alone does not mean lonely... You look in the mirror and come to terms with the fact that you will never be a size 5 or a perfect 10 and you stop trying to compete with the image inside your head and agonizing over how you "stack up." You also stop working so hard at putting your feelings aside, smoothing things over and ignoring your needs. You learn that feelings of entitlement are perfectly OK.... and that it is your right to want things and to ask for the things that you want...and that sometimes it is necessary to make demands. You come to the realization that you deserve to be treated with love, kindness, sensitivity and respect and you won't settle for less. And, you allow only the hands of a lover who cherishes you to glorify you with his touch... and in the process you internalize the meaning of self-respect. And you learn that your body really is your temple. And you begin to care for it and treat it with respect. You begin eating a balanced diet, drinking more water and taking more time to exercise. You learn that fatigue diminishes the spirit and can create doubt and fear. So you take more time to rest. And, just as food fuels the body, laughter fuels our soul. So you take more time to laugh and to play. You learn, that for the most part, in life you get what you believe you deserve... and that much of life truly is a self-fulfilling prophecy. You learn that anything worth achieving is worth working for and that wishing for something to happen is different from working toward making it happen. More importantly, you learn that in order to achieve success you need direction, discipline and perseverance. You also learn that no one can do it all alone and that it's OK to risk asking for help. You learn that the only thing you must truly fear is the great robber baron of all time... FEAR itself. You learn to step right into and through your fears because you know that whatever happens you can handle it and to give in to fear is to give away the right to live life on your terms. And you learn to fight for your life and not to squander it living under a cloud of impending doom. You learn that life isn't always fair, you don't always get what you think you deserve and that sometimes bad things happen to unsuspecting, good people. On these occasions you learn not to personalize things. You learn that God isn't punishing you or failing to answer your prayers. It's just life happening. And you learn to deal with evil in its most primal state - the ego. You learn that negative feelings such as anger, envy and resentment must be understood and redirected or they will suffocate the life out of you and poison the universe that surrounds you. You learn to admit when you are wrong and to building bridges instead of walls. You learn to be thankful and to take comfort in many of the simple things we take for granted, things that millions of people upon the earth can only dream about: a full refrigerator, clean running water, a soft warm bed, a long hot shower. Slowly, you begin to take responsibility for yourself by yourself and you make yourself a promise to never betray yourself and to never, ever settle for less than your heart's desire. You hang a wind chime outside your window so you can listen to the wind. And you make it a point to keep smiling, to keep trusting, and to stay open to every wonderful possibility. Finally, with courage in your heart and with God (whatever you believe him/her to be) by your side you take a stand, you take a deep breath and you begin to design the life you want to live as best as you can. -- AUTHOR UNKNOWN (But dearly appreciated) (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1723679 Thu, 21 Aug 2008 22:10:00 +0100 1723679 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2008/08/wisdom-of-rooms.html "Recovery is the only place where you can walk into a room full of strangers and reminisce." When I began going to meetings, I remember how uncomfortable it was being around so many people that I didn't know. As soon as they found out I was new, many of them came up to me and gave me their phone numbers, asked me how I was doing, and wanted to know all kinds of things I that didn't want to tell them. It was all pretty overwhelming.As I sat and listened to people's shares, I was pretty sure I didn't belong because I hadn't done half the stuff I was hearing. That's when my sponsor told me I hadn't done them 'yet'. He asked me if I identified with the other half, and I admitted I could. He suggested I looked for the ways I was the same, rather than the ways I was different.It's amazing how that little piece of advice has changed my life. Now, no matter what part of the world I'm in, I can always find a part of myself in the strangers I meet in the rooms of recovery. Even if I don't know you personally, I know I can identify with many of your experiences and with the way you feel and think.This is what allows strangers like us to start reminiscing the first time we ever meet. Visit: http://www.theWisdomoftheRooms.com (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1720580 Wed, 20 Aug 2008 13:13:00 +0100 1720580 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2008/08/daily-reflections.html AUGUST 10 Reflection for the Day We've been our own worst enemies most of our lives, and we've often injured ourselves seriously as a result of a "justified" resentment over a slight wrong. Doubtless there are many causes for resentment in the world, most of them providing "justification." But we can never begin to settle all the world's grievances or even arrange things so as to please everybody. If we've been treated unjustly by others or simply by life itself, we can avoid compounding the difficulty by completely forgiving the persons involved and abandoning the destructive habit of reviewing our hurts and humiliations.Can I believe that yesterday's hurt is today's understanding, rewoven into tomorrow's love?Today I PrayWhether I am unjustly treated or just think I am, may I try not to be a resentful person, stewing over past injuries. Once I have identified the root emotion behind my resentment, may I be big enough to forgive the person involved and wise enough to forget the whole thing.Today I Will RememberNot all injustice can be fixed.AUGUST 11 Reflection for the Day When I dwell on piddling things that annoy me--and they sprout resentments that grow bigger and bigger like weeds--I forget how I could be stretching my world and broadening my outlook. For me, that's an ideal way to shrink troubles down to their real size. When somebody or something is causing me trouble, I should try to see the incident in relation to the rest of my life--especially the part that's good and for which I should be grateful. Am I willing to waste my life worrying about trifles that drain my spiritual energy?Today I Will RememberMicroscopic irritations can ruin my vision. AUGUST 9 Reflection for the DayOn numerous occasions, I've found that there's a strong connection between my fears and my resentments. If I secretly fear that I'm inadequate, for example, I'll tend to resent deeply anybody whose actions or words expose my imagined inadequacy. But it's usually too painful to admit that my own fears and doubts about myself are the cause of my resentments. It's a lot easier to pin the blame on somone else's "bad behavior" or "selfish motives"--and use that as the justification for my resentments. Do I realize that by resenting someone, I allow that person to live rent-free in my head?Today I Will RememberAs I build myself up, I tear down my resentments.AUGUST 8 Reflection for the DayAs a recovering compulsive gambler, I have to remind myself that no amount of social acceptance of resentments will take the poison out of them. In a way, the problem of resentments is very much like the gambling problem. A poker game or casino is never safe for me. I've attended benefits for worthy causes, often in a convivial atmosphere that makes gambling seem almost harmless.Just as I politely but adamantly decline gambling under any conditions, will I also refuse to accept resentments?Today I PrayWhen anger, hurt, fear, or guilt--to be socially acceptable--put on their polite, party manners, dress up as resentments, and come in the side door, may I not hobnob with them. These emotions, disguised as they are, can be as full of trickery as gambling itself.Today I Will RememberKeep an eye on the side door.AUGUST 7 Reflection for the Day What can we do about our resentments? Experience has shown that the best thing to do is to write them down, listing people, institutions, or principles that are objects of our anger or resentment. When I write down my resentments and then ask myself why I'm resentful, I've discovered that in most cases my self-esteem, my finances, my ambitions, or my personal relationships have been hurt or threatened. Will I ever learn that the worst thing about my resentments is my endless rehearsal of my acts of retribution?Today I Will RememberResentments cause violence: resentments cause illness in nonviolent people.AUGUST 6 Reflection for the DaySometimes through bitter experience and painful lessons, we learn in our fellowship with others in Gamblers Anonymous that resentment is our number one enemy. It destroys more of us than anything else. From resentment stem all forms of spiritual disease, for we've been not only mentally and physically ill, but spiritually ill as well. As we recover and as our spiritual illness is remedied, we become well physically and mentally. Am I aware that few things are more bitter than to feel bitter? Do I see that my venom is more poisonous to me than to my victim?Today I Will RememberResentments are rubbish; haul them away. (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1720581 Wed, 20 Aug 2008 13:04:00 +0100 1720581 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2008/08/why-do-we-cling-to-our-addictions.html Addictions often begin as a pursuit of pleasure to numb the discomfort of painful losses. Addictions are not just diversions of choice. We see them as lifeboats necessary for our survival. Addictions give us something we believe we must have in order to live. They provide predictable relief and power in an unpredictable and painful world. THE PURSUIT OF RELIEF. When faced with a loss of health, when haunted by harm done to others, when hounded by the rejection of a parent or spouse, it is natural for us to try to relieve the pain. We hate feeling guilty, disconnected, empty, and alone. We long for acceptance and love. Our addictions provide a remedy that helps us to forget the pain--at least for a little while. Alcoholism drowns sorrow. Drug addiction turns lows to highs. Compulsive overeating fills our emptiness. Obsessive work replaces insecurities with a sense of accomplishment. Sexual addiction mimics adventure and intimacy. Addictions often begin as a pursuit of pleasure to numb the discomfort of painful losses. But we soon discover that addictions multiply the pain. In time, it becomes worse than the pain we were trying to relieve. Now we find ourselves needing relief not only from our inescapable losses but also from the shame of our own foolishness. We feel shame for trusting in addictive behavior that made our problem worse. Shame, however, is also a deceiver. In the beginning, pleasure holds us in the addiction. In time, shame has the same effect. In their own ways, both are deceptively effective pain relievers. Pleasure is a filler; shame is a killer. Pleasure is a distracter; shame is an assassin. Both attach to our addictions. Both combine with our obsessions to numb our hearts not only to the harm we are doing to others but also to our own longing for love and relationship. Ironically, shame ends up being even more useful than pleasure in providing relief from our pain. Shame causes us to feel unworthy to give and receive love. Shame deadens our longings for relationship. Shame becomes a powerful pain killer not merely by lessening our pain but by deadening our hearts until we feel nothing at all. When our hearts are deadened, we don't hurt. We don't long to give and receive love. Neither are we able to feel the harm we are doing to others. Yet using our addiction and its resulting shame to feel nothing seems preferable to bearing the sorrows of life. THE PURSUIT OF POWER. Addictions also provide an illusion of control. They are like private magic carpets that transport us into a world where we seem to be in charge. They provide a predictable way of changing the way we feel about ourselves and others. Addictions provide us with predictable moments we can count on, while giving us the illusion of control. While people and circumstances are beyond our control, our addictions deliver on their promise of comfort, pleasure, power, control--now. By refusing to eat, by purging what we have eaten, by using our work to attain recognition, by making another purchase, we feel power rather than helplessness. Addictions are attractive because they appear to provide predictable doses of relief and power in the midst of pain and helplessness. But in reality they are a house of mirrors, promising us freedom and then trapping us with little hope of escape. The effect is always self-destructive bondage. What we find out too late is that in exchange for relief and control, our addictions master us. Even though we tell ourselves we have everything under control, experience tells us otherwise. We'd quit if we could. But we have become a slave to our own desires. We want our addiction more than we want to quit. We believe we need and deserve the relief and the power our addiction provides. At some point, we are forced to choose between our addiction and those who love us. We know what we desperately want. We don't want to lose those we love. But we don't know how we could survive without the "friend" that is destroying us. We feel trapped in an addictive cycle. WHAT IS THE ADDICTIVE CYCLE? As we lose more and more of ourselves to our addiction, our pleasure decreases. Moments of relief are replaced by lingering shame. We feel guilty for having a habit that is socially unacceptable. We are afraid of being discovered. In turn, we resolve to quit, or to make amends for our failures, hoping it will lessen our feelings of guilt and shame. But it never does. We may have temporarily swept our lives clean of the addiction and its unpleasant feelings, but nothing has replaced it. As a result, we are more acutely aware of our emptiness. Feelings of disillusionment and despair set in, and once again we begin to demand relief. Our demand for relief draws us back into the familiar arms of our habit. This cycle is played out again and again with deepening levels of dissatisfaction, disillusionment, despair, and enslavement. (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1709764 Sat, 16 Aug 2008 04:51:00 +0100 1709764 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2008/07/myths-and-facts.html How can we change public opinion and get rid of the stigma surrounding addiction? We can start by learning the difference between the real facts and common myths about addiction: Myth: A person addicted to drugs or gambling can stop whenever he or she wants. Fact: Addiction is a chronic brain disease that has little to do with willpower. Research shows that long-term alcohol, substance use or gambling changes a person’s brain function, which makes them crave the substance even more. As a result, most people with an alcohol, substance use, or gambling problem need help at one time or another. People are able to cut down or stop their problematic use in many ways including through the use of formal treatment, counseling, self-help groups, support of others and their faith. Myth: Treatment of addiction doesn’t work and is too expensive. Fact: Treatment works for the addicted person and it works for society. Different types of addiction treatment are successful between 40 and 60 percent of the time. This success rate is similar to the treatment success rate for other conditions like asthma, high blood pressure and diabetes. For those involved in the criminal justice system, addiction treatment has been shown to decrease criminal activity after treatment. Many studies show for every $1 spent on addiction treatment as much as $7 is saved in healthcare, welfare, criminal justice and other public costs. Myth: A person can’t be helped until they’ve “hit bottom.” Fact: Many people with substance use or gambling problems can get help before they’ve developed a full blown addiction or “hit bottom.” This is why early screening and intervention services are so important. Family members, friends, healthcare providers or employers can play a role by sharing concerns and asking someone with a problem to seek treatment. Myth: There should be one treatment program for all addictions. Fact: Not every treatment method works for everyone. The most effective programs take into account the individual needs of each person and make thorough assessments about someone’s current circumstances and level of addiction. Myth: If a person is motivated to stop, they should be able to complete drug abuse treatment in a short period of time. Fact: Studies show for many a successful road to recovery includes follow-up supervision and support long after the treatment program is completed. People who remain in treatment programs for at least 90 days are more likely to remain substance-free than those who do not. Myth: Relapse equals failure. Fact: Recovery is a long process and sometimes relapse is a very real part of that process. Many things can trigger a relapse: stress at work or home, taking part in a social function that includes substance use, or even smells or familiar people and objects associated with the addiction. But people who relapse can and do recover. (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1616479 Sat, 12 Jul 2008 02:44:00 +0100 1616479 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2008/05/daily-guru_26.html Appreciation "You can never get to peace and inner security without first acknowledging all of the good things in your life. If you're forever wanting and longing for more without first appreciating things the way they are, you'll stay in discord." -- Doc Childre and Howard Martin Develop an attitude of gratitude. We discover a sense of wholeness as we appreciate both the small and big things in our lives. And it really helps to remember to appreciate ourselves. Appreciation is more than just acceptance -- it's respect and admiration. Let go of criticism and self-abuse. "Generally, appreciation means some blend of thankfulness, admiration, approval, and gratitude. In the financial world, something that ‘appreciates’ grows in value. With the power tool of appreciation, you get the benefit of both perspectives: as you learn to be consistently thankful and approving, your life will grow in value." -- Doc Childre and Howard Martin (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1467949 Sun, 25 May 2008 21:28:00 +0100 1467949 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2008/05/daily-reflection.html Getting over years of suspicion and other self - protective mechanisms can hardly be an overnight process. We've become thoroughly conditioned to feeling and acting misunderstood and unloved - whether we really were or not. Some of us may need time and pratice to break out of our shell and the seemingly comfortable familiarity of solitude. Even though we begin to believe and know we're no longer alone, we tend to sometimes feel and act in the old ways. Am I taking it easy? Am I learning to wear the Gamblers Anonymous Program and life like a loose garment? Today I Pray May I expect no sudden, total reversal of all my old traits. My abstinence from gambling is just a beginning. May I realize that the symptons of my compulsion will wear off gradually. If I slip back, now and then, into my old self - pity bag or my grandiosity, may I not be discouraged, but grateful. At last, I can face myself honestly and not let my delusions get the best of me. Today I Will Remember Easy does it. (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1467083 Sun, 25 May 2008 00:00:00 +0100 1467083 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2008/05/daily-guru_24.html Life as a mirror "Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves." -- C.G. Jung We get clues about our unconscious programming if we watch our reactions, responses, feelings and thoughts about other people and events. Ask yourself: How do I judge or stereotype people? What pushes my buttons? What makes me angry or fearful or sad? The outer incidents that trigger these reactions in me simply MIRROR my own nature. If I didn't have beliefs around the issues that upset me, where would my reactions come from? If I didn't have some internal reference, I wouldn't react at all. When outer events spark a reaction, we need to look inside to explore what’s going on. "We discover in ourselves what others hide from us and we recognize in others what we hide from ourselves." -- Vauvenargues (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1466305 Sat, 24 May 2008 04:58:00 +0100 1466305 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2008/05/quote-of-week_21.html Fits into gambling relapse also: "Relapse begins a long time before you pick up that first drink or drug." I'm a three meeting minimum a week kind of guy. Anything below that and I begin feeling, well, kind of vulnerable. Oh, not that I'm going to pick up and use, but vulnerable to what my head tells me, and vulnerable to feeling more irritable, restless and discontented. I'm quicker to judge, and I begin storing resentments.After a few weeks of that, it begins to get harder to make even two meetings a week. Soon I'm not answering my phone very much and calling my sponsor doesn't even occur to me. Work pressures mount, and on the way home you're not driving fast enough, and the parking lot is full, and Blockbuster doesn't have the movie I want. Suddenly the world is out of whack, and the idea of a drink seems not only natural, but completely reasonable as well.I can't tell you the number of times I've heard people who relapse tell a story similar to the one above. It always scares the heck out of me because there have been times when I've begun to go down that same path. Thank God for my commitments, a strong support group, regular meetings I look forward to, and sponsees who continue to call me.Today I have four meetings a week I go to - whether I need them or not - because I want to keep the distance between me a relapse as far apart as possible. ___________________________________ Want to subscribe? Visit: http://www.theWisdomoftheRooms.com to sign up for FREE. (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1458875 Wed, 21 May 2008 00:05:00 +0100 1458875 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2008/05/question-your-intention.html "Men are more accountable for their motives, than for anything else ...." -- Archibald Alexander Why are you doing what you are doing? Throughout the day, continually ask yourself about your underlying motivation. Are you doing what you are doing for selfish, manipulative or fearful reasons, or in honest service? Maybe you will see that much of your activity lacks purpose. This is a great way to become more conscious. Your intention and motives are fundamental to the results you receive. Set high intentions and your life will blossom. "A good intention clothes itself with power." -- Ralph Waldo Emerson (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1454845 Mon, 19 May 2008 21:32:00 +0100 1454845 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2008/05/reflection-for-day_19.html I considered myself a "loner" in the days when I was gambling. Although I was often with other people--saw them, heard them, touched them--most of my important dialogues were with my inner self. I was certain that nobody else would ever understand. Considering my former opinion of myself, it's likely that I didn't want anybody to understand. I smiled through gritted teeth even as I was dying on the inside.Have my insides begun to match my outside since I've been in the Gamblers Anonymous Program?Today I PrayMay my physical, emotional, intellectual, and spiritual selves become one, a whole person again. I thank my Higher Power for showing me how to match my outside to my inside, to laugh when I feel like laughing, to cry when I feel sad, to recognize my own anger or fear or guilt. I pray for wholeness.Today I Will RememberI am becoming whole. (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1451988 Sun, 18 May 2008 21:09:00 +0100 1451988 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2008/05/daily-guru_14.html MAKE CHANGE A POSITIVE PART OF YOUR LIFE You must avoid breaking when things don't go your way. You'll always be secure to the degree that you accept change. True security comes from being able to bend your insecurities. Recognize and accept that change will inevitably take place. You'll become secure, not by standing still, but by growing, moving, and staying energized. Be secure in the knowledge that you can deal with anything that happens to you. Have the courage to bet on your ideas. Take some calculated risks and act on your dreams. There is no permanent security on this earth, there is only opportunity.www.thedailyguru.com (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1440055 Tue, 13 May 2008 21:24:00 +0100 1440055 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2008/05/reflection-for-day_3989.html When a person wakes up each morning and rises, with nerves screaming and sick at heart, to face frightening reality; when a person stumbles through the day in a pit of despair, wishing to die, but refusing to die; when a person gets up the next day and does it all over again--well, that takes guts. That takes a kind of real, basic survival courage, a courage that can be put to good use if that person ever finds his or her way to Gamblers Anonymous. That person has learned courage the hard way, and when that person comes to the GA Program, he or she will find new and beautiful ways to use it. Have I the courage to keep trying, one day at a time? Today I PrayMay I put the "guts-to-survive" kind of courage left over from my gambling days into good use in the Program. If I was able to "hang on" enough to live through the miseries of my addiction, may I translate that same will to survive into my recovery program. May I use my courage in new, constructive ways. (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1440056 Tue, 13 May 2008 13:05:00 +0100 1440056 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2008/05/daily-guru.html EVERY FAILURE IS A STEP CLOSER TO SUCCESS People who try to do something and fail are infinitely better than those who try to do nothing and succeed. Experiencing failure is inevitable on your journey to be successful. Every defeat is merely an installment to victory. You'll find that the number of times you succeed is in direct proportion to the number of times you fail and keep trying. You won't be judged by the number of times you fail, but by the number of times you succeed. Failure is nothing but education, nothing but the first step to something better.*************************************©2006 by Max SteingartReproduce freely but maintain © notice************************************* (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1437140 Mon, 12 May 2008 21:27:00 +0100 1437140 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2008/05/reflection-for-day_13.html My courage must come each day, as does my desire to avoid a single bet, a single addictive act. It must be a continuing courage, without deviations and procrastination, without rashness, and without fear of obstacles. this would seem like a large order indeed, were it not for the fact that it is confined to this one day, and that within this day much power is given to me. Do I extend the Serenity Prayer to my entire life? Today I Pray May each new morning offer me a supply of courage to last me during the day. If my courage is renewed each day and I know that I need just a day's worth, that courage will always be fresh and the supply will not run out. May I realize, as days pass, that what I feared during the earliest days of my recovery I no longer fear, that my daily courage is now helping me cope with bigger problems. Today I Will Remember ..... give me courage - just for today. (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1437141 Mon, 12 May 2008 21:20:00 +0100 1437141 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2008/05/wisdom-of-rooms_13.html "The program does for us slowly what (gambling) alcohol and drugs did for us quickly." I can clearly remember what I felt like before recovery. I was anxious, on edge, so uncomfortable with my life that I wanted and needed to escape. I can also remember the immediate sense of ease and comfort that came from the first hit of my drugs or alcohol. Suddenly, everything was OK, and the future actually had some hope in it. This was my solution for a long time, and when it stopped working, I was truly at a jumping off point. In the beginning of my recovery, meetings and fellowship offered me temporary relief from the near constant dread and anxiety I felt. The problem was how to get by in between meetings, and I'll tell you, it was rough going for quite a while.And that's when I heard someone share that "we go to meetings for relief, but we work the steps for recovery." As I worked my program, I found this to be true. The relief and sense of ease and comfort I used to get through using now began to be part of my everyday experience. After a while, I actually had peace and serenity and most of the time felt comfortable in my own skin.One day I realized that the program had done for me slowly what drugs and alcohol had done for me quickly.Visit:http://www.theWisdomoftheRooms.com (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1437142 Mon, 12 May 2008 21:17:00 +0100 1437142 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2008/05/reflection-for-day.html My courage must come each day, as does my desire to avoid a single bet, a single addictive act. It must be a continuing courage, without deviations and procrastination, without rashness, and without fear of obstacles. this would seem like a large order indeed, were it not for the fact that it is confined to this one day, and that within this day much power is given to me. Do I extend the Serenity Prayer to my entire life? Today I Pray May each new morning offer me a supply of courage to last me during the day. If my courage is renewed each day and I know that I need just a day's worth, that courage will always be fresh and the supply will not run out. May I realize, as days pass, that what I feared during the earliest days of my recovery I no longer fear, that my daily courage is now helping me cope with bigger problems. Today I Will Remember God give me courage - just for today. (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1437143 Mon, 12 May 2008 14:16:00 +0100 1437143 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2008/05/wisdom-of-rooms.html "Things aren't necessarily going wrong just because they're not going my way." This is still hard for me to accept. My ego tells me that my plans and ideas about how things should go, and how you should act, are 99% right, and that if everybody would just fall in line, then everything would be great and I'd be happy. But how many times has my self will twisted or bullied things into place and got me what I thought I wanted, when I'd eventually realize it wasn't what I wanted? Most of the time is the short answer.There's an old gypsy curse that goes, "May you get everything you want." Once again, my ego hears that and says, "That doesn't sound like a curse!" but my experience understands the wisdom in it. And one of the gifts I've received in recovery is the willingness to pray for the knowledge of God's will (not mine) and the power to carry that out.And that's when the miracle truly happens for me and countless others. You see, the wants and needs of my ego are limited and short sighted. But God's will is vast and includes infinite possibilities for happiness and fulfillment. By developing the faith to truly seek God's will, I've been able to let go of controlling others, to show up and look for ways to be of service, and to let go of expectations.And doing this has enabled me to see that, "Things aren't necessarily going wrong just because they're not going my way." Want to subscribe? Visit: http://www.theWisdomoftheRooms.com to sign up for FREE. (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1437144 Mon, 12 May 2008 03:10:00 +0100 1437144 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2008/05/quote-of-week.html "Without tolerance for another, it's hard to have empathy for myself" Tolerant was one of the last words you would have used to describe me before I entered the program. Instead, I was quick to judge you and could always find fault with what you said, or how you dressed, or what you did. My opinion of myself was so low that I constantly had to rip you down to build myself up. Living this way made me bitter, isolated and resentful.As I listed my resentments in my fourth step, and more importantly my part, I began to see how much my fear and low self-esteem drove my decisions and actions, hurting both myself and others. But as I listened to others sharing honestly and openly about their struggles and fears, I began to feel a connection, and for the first time an empathy for others.I once read a description of empathy as being an emotional echo that is sent out to the inner center of another person and that returns with pieces of yourself. And once I began finding pieces of myself in other people's stories, I began to look for the shared humanity in our experiences. And that's when I began to develop tolerance and compassion for others as well as for myself.Today I understand that without tolerance for another, it's hard to have empathy for myself.Want to subscribe? Visit: http://www.theWisdomoftheRooms.com to sign up for FREE. (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1437145 Mon, 12 May 2008 00:17:00 +0100 1437145 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2008/05/may-9-reflection-for-day.html Energy Follows Focus, So Whatever You Focus On, That Is What Will Happen !!! "Perfect courage," wrote La Rochefocauld, "means doing unwitnessed what we would be capable of with the world looking on."As we grow in the Gamblers Anonymous Program, we recognize persistent fear for what it is, and we become able to handle it. We begin to see each adversity as a God-given opportunity to develop the kind of courage that is born of humility, rather than of bravado. Do I realize that whistling to keep up my courage is merely good pratice for whistling? Today I Pray May I find courage in my Higher Power. Since all things are possible through God, I must be able to overcome the insidious fears that haunt me - so often fears of losing someone or something that has become important in my life.I pray for my own willingness to let go of those fears. Today I Will Remember Praying is more than whistling in the dark. (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1433937 Sat, 10 May 2008 02:36:00 +0100 1433937 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2008/05/today-is-time-for-action.html You must be ready when opportunity comes before you.Luck is the time when your preparation and opportunity meet.There is a tide in your affairs, which, when taken at the flood, will lead you on to fortune and success.By the law of periodical repetition, everything which has happened once must happen again and again and again, not capriciously, but at regular periods,and each thing in it's own period, and each obeying its own law.As events tend to repeat themselves, the tide of opportunity will come to you.Be prepared and your chance for success is sure to come.Look around you. Seize an opportunity to change your life.You can change chance into good fortune if you are ready.The only sure thing about your luck is that it will change.******************************** ©2006 by Max Steingart Reproduce freely but maintain © notice ************************************************************** (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1433938 Sat, 10 May 2008 02:16:00 +0100 1433938 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2008/04/something-to-think-about.html Gambling addicts don't keep playing because they like the feeling whenthey win,so much as they hope to win to get rid of the feeling that comes whenthey lose. (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1385858 Sun, 20 Apr 2008 00:09:00 +0100 1385858 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2008/04/something-to-think-about_20.html Gambling addicts don't keep playing because they like the feeling whenthey win,so much as they hope to win to get rid of the feeling that comes whenthey lose. (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1385857 Sun, 20 Apr 2008 00:09:00 +0100 1385857 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2008/01/wisdom-of-rooms.html http://www.theWisdomoftheRooms.comQuote of the Week "Anger is one letter away from Danger." When I came into the program I was so angry, but I didn't realize how much. For years I had used drugs and alcohol to numb these feelings, to manage and hide them. When these were taken away, my anger quickly turned to rage, and I soon found that I had turned much of this rage inward. In fact today I still believe that a core characteristic of alcoholism is self-loathing. Thank God for the Steps. By working the 12 Steps I learned to forgive others and myself, take responsibility for my part, and I learned how to surrender to a Higher Power. Slowly I began to release a lot of the shame and resentment that made up a lot of my rage. But I still get angry sometimes. And these days I've learned that when I do get angry, I'm still in danger of turning it inward and acting in self-destructive ways. I'm quick to isolate and grow more depressed, to tell someone off and create resentments, or even to eat too much and go into self-loathing. Thankfully today I've learned to acknowledge and deal with my anger before it turns into rage. Today I realize that anger is one letter away from danger. ___________________________________ (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1162881 Sun, 20 Jan 2008 06:10:00 +0100 1162881 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2008/01/quote-of-week.html "Anger and resentment are masks for fear." When I came into the program, I was pretty angry. With the alcohol and drugs gone, I very quickly got in touch with my feelings, and for me that meant my anger quickly turned into rage. Oh, and resentments - I had a lot of those as well. Without having developed the spiritual tools to deal with my feelings yet, I was pretty miserable. As I began working my way through the program, I learned in the twelve and twelve that we were driven by a hundred forms of self centered fear. After doing a thorough 4th step that included a fear inventory, I found I was driven by way more than just a hundred! It took years, though, for me to realize the connection between my fears and the anger and resentment I felt. Today I not only see the connection, but I feel it all the time. In fact, today I know that whenever I'm feeling uncomfortable, impatient, quick to snap at people, or just generally irritable, I'm usually in fear of something. And, again, the twelve and twelve tells me it's usually that I'm afraid of losing something or of not getting something I demand. The good news is that today I have a solution. Today, when I'm feeling angry or resentful, I stop and ask myself what I'm afraid of. Doing this allows me to take the mask off my fears and that always leads me to a solution. ___________________________________Want to subscribe? Visit: http://www.theWisdomoftheRooms.com to sign up for FREE. (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1123434 Tue, 01 Jan 2008 05:00:00 +0100 1123434 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2007/12/all-success-starts-with-beginning.html Everyone who got where they are had to begin where they were.There are opportunities all around you.To reach your goal or to attain success, you don't need to knowall of the answers in advance.But you do need to have a clear idea of your goal.Don't procrastinate when faced with difficult problems.Break those problems into parts, and handle one part at a time.Develop tendencies toward action.Break your big plan into small steps and take the first step right away.You can make something happen, right now.A journey of a thousand miles begins with one step. Take it.. THE DAILY GURU*************************************************************************©2006 by Max SteingartReproduce freely but maintain © notice************************************************************************* (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1121305 Sun, 30 Dec 2007 05:00:00 +0100 1121305 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2007/10/top-10-ways-to-design-your-destiny.html The Top 10 Ways to Design Your Destiny 1. Decide you can do it. You already are. Every decision you make every day makes YOU! Awaken to this and drive your destiny. 2. Energise your desires. And be energised by them. Your desires allied with your decisions make miracles happen. 3. Follow your intuition. Let your intuition surprise you, and lead you in some unexpected directions as you... 4. Take the lead in your life. You ARE the champion in your circle. Step up and claim your title. Your life influences people, whether you want it to or not. Be the winner that lights their lives. 5. Make action your passion. "Just do it." 6. Evaluate the invaluable -- Your Values. In knowing your values you know yourself. They are what drive you, what you drive, and how you handle the road of your life. 7. Inform your dedication. Just like your values, you choose 'em. What do you want to make happen in the world? Why do you want it? Give yourself the gift of clear focus - and taste the sweetness of dedication made evident. 8. Balance your beliefs... With your focus, values and goals. Every belief can serve you easily or challenge you to grow - give yourself a great mix and watch the party of your life unfold. 9. Enhance your heart, For designing your destiny is most effective with a big heart in mind. 10. Develop your devotion... To that which really matters to you. Designing your destiny is fun for its own sake for five minutes. What is your life really about? Submitted by Elizabeth Mullen, who can be reached at em@cornerstonecoaching.com, or visited on the web at http://www.cornerstonecoaching.com © 2001 CoachVille. The Top 10 Great Life Skills to Have, to Use and Improve It takes a lot of skills to negotiate through life. Many of them we pick up along the way, others we need to develop, and some we just need to polish a little bit. Here are a few life skills to consider getting, using, or practicing in your life... 1. Listening 2. Giving compliments 3. Accepting compliments 4. Thinking positive 5. Saying "No" 6. Laughing 7. Planning 8. Asking questions 9. Reading 10. Exercising Submitted by Jim Allen, who can be reached at Jim@CoachJim.com, or visited on the web at http://www.CoachJim.com © 2001 CoachVille. Top ten beliefs to help you create the work you were born to do. 1. You can find what you love and earn money from it. 2. You can change your attitude and your circumstances. 3. Your inspiration and love can lead to paid work or a great job. 4. You can be authentic and real, and be successful. 5. The purpose of work is to find and give expression to the best of you, and work can be easy and natural. 6. Life supports you when you find your heart, love and passion, and the intelligence inside you will handle many of the details. 7. You can bring more and more of yourself to your work. 8. You have more creativity and resources inside you than you ever imagined. 9. It is safe to be successful, be your best self and shine your light. 10. You are good enough, have lots of gifts, skills and talents and deserve success How to simplify your Life In this very fast paced world, it seems impossible to simplify our lives. But think about this, how much time and energy do you waste on the unnecessary? How much time do you waste because you can't find things? How much energy do you waste telling yourself all the things you should do? How much time do you spend having fun? We often make life much more complicated than it needs to be and somehow we have convinced ourselves that our lives must be filled to max. We over schedule our lives, and then wonder why we feel dissatisfied. In turn, we end up spending the majority of our time on the things that don't matter to us. Here are some strategies to help you weed out the unnecessary and simplify, simplify, simplify. 1. Extend your boundaries. It is okay to say no. If you are not comfortable committing to a task, or something doesn't feel right to you, then don't do it. We often get in trouble because we ignore our gut feelings, and most of the time it leads us down the wrong path. 2. Drop your to-dos. Drop the to-dos that have been on your list for a couple of months. Get rid of those tasks that you keep telling yourself that you will get done but you always find something more interesting/important to do. If you have not done them by now, they are not important and draining your energy. 3. Remove clutter. How much time do you waste looking for things? Do you have stuff that you need to get rid of? The more cluttered your space is, the more stressed you are going to feel. When you remove clutter, get rid of stuff that you no longer need, and give objects a home, your life will run more smoothly. In addition, you will create a space for new things to enter your life. 4. Develop your values. Determine what your values are and live to those values. We often feel conflicted because how we are living is out of sync with our values. For example, if your number one value is family and your job requires you to work 65 hours a week is it any wonder that you feel unsettled and unhappy? When you're clear about what is important to you, it will be easier to let go of things that don't fit. 5. Examine your beliefs. What are your core beliefs? Some of your beliefs may be limiting your ability to let go of tasks and projects that don't add value. If you believe that you create value by being busy, it is much harder to let go of tasks. If you believe that the only way to make money is to work hard, then you will always work hard. Remember, we look for circumstances in our lives to reinforce what we believe. 6. Create priorities. Determine the 1 or 2 things you want to accomplish within the next year for your career/business, home life, relationships, and self. Work only to those priorities. If your goal is to develop a new income generating product line, that is where you should spend significant time focusing your attention. It is very easy to get distracted from our priorities, because there is so much information out there that inspires our interest. How often do you get diverted to other projects and never finish what you were originally working? What happens? The year goes by and you did not accomplish any of your objectives. When new ideas do excite us, get an idea notebook and write all of your new ideas down for future projects. One note, if you find yourself working on everything but your stated priorities, it may be time to reexamine what you think you want. 7. Give yourself permission to relax. We live in a culture that has taught us that relaxing is the equivalent to being lazy so we have created lives that are bursting at the seams and don't give us time to think. There is another way, give yourself permission to relax. Revel in doing nothing. Give yourself time to just think and do nothing. You will be amazed at all the new and interesting discoveries that come to you. 8. If you're struggling, let it go. If something is a real struggle, or you can't come up with a solution, drop it for awhile. Giving yourself a mental break will allow your brain to rest and therefore create new ideas. Have you ever woken up in the middle of the night and had an aha? This happens for two reasons, 1) because you are relaxed, and 2) because you were not trying to direct your brain's thoughts. Giving yourself a mental break from a challenge is a great way to consciously create that aha. 9. Take care of yourself. Isn't it funny that we take better care of our cars than our bodies? Take care of your body and mind. Eat things that bring you a sense of energy and lightness. Eat to fuel your body. Exercise your body to reduce stress and clear your mind. Exercise your brain with new activities. This will go a long way in helping you feel more calm and relaxed. 10. Have fun. Why is it so hard for us to have fun? Make time each week to do something that brings you joy. Do something completely silly. Have fun with yourself. Laugh. Forget all the other stuff for awhile and just have fun. You will feel a whole lot better. This piece was originally submitted by Jennifer Ottolino, Personal & Professional Coach, who can be reached at Jen@coachjen.com, or at www.coachjen.com © 2000-2002 by Thomas J. Leonard. (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=980682 Fri, 26 Oct 2007 04:00:00 +0100 980682 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2007/10/who-is-this-person.html If you ain't just a little scared when you enter a casino, you are either very rich or you haven't studied the games enough. VP Pappy Who is This Person It is not unusual for the spouse of a compulsive gambler to wake up one day with his or her whole world turned upside down. When the spouse or family becomes aware of the gambler's addiction, he may be so far in debt that the spouse cannot even comprehend the extent of the debt. It may take months for the spouse to unravel the web of debt. Often even the gambler does not know how much money he has lost or to whom he owes money. How a spouse does not realize the extent of the problem is a curiosity, however for most spouses, they are truly blind sided by the extent of the damage that the gambler has done. Many spouses know that their spouse is a gambler, they just don't have any idea how bad it has gotten. Compulsive gamblers very quickly become master manipulators, liars and thieves. It is very common for the gambling addict to have been a responsible, thrifty, apparently well rounded individual...................until they start to gamble. Unfortunately, you cannot tell a gambling addict when they are walking down the street. There is no smell to their breath, they don't have needle marks in their arms, they don't stumble or slur their words. Anyone, doctors, lawyers, teachers, ministers, housewives, great grandmothers, teenagers, accountants, fast food workers....anyone can be a compulsive gambler. Gambling addiction is very much like other addictions in some ways, but it has it's own unique qualities. Gambling addiction is the only addiction that has the promise of a "jackpot." Heroin addicts do not delude themselves into thinking that if they shoot up one more time, all of their problems will be solved. The alcoholic doesn't loot his savings and 401K to buy alcohol. Sex addicts do not think that if they have just one more anonymous sexual encounter they can make up for all the damage they have done. The compulsive gambler continues to gamble thinking that the next turn of the card, roll of the dice or spin of the wheels will be the "big one." The win that will make it all all right, turn their luck around, allow them to pay back all of the money they have lost. Unfortunately, even if there is a big win, it doesn't matter. The compulsive gambler just keeps gambling, thinking if he won that much, he can win some more. One of the worst things that can happen to a pathological gambler is to win big. It just reinforces that idea that if he keeps at it, he will win more. Once the gambler becomes a pathological gambler, he or she is no longer the same person and neither is their spouse. The person who always buys used cars because new cars lose value too quickly, suddenly doesn't think anything of blasting through $1,000 on the slots in an hour. The guy who maxed out his 401K contributions every year finds himself blowing on dice, screaming "come on seven" with his last dollar on the table. The person who has scrimped and saved for years to buy the R.V. to travel in during his golden years, suddenly finds it reasonable to bet it all on red at the roulette table. The person who has saved to put his child through college because he never had the chance to go, suddenly forgets how important that goal is and blows the whole wad on the ponies in a fun filled weekend. It's almost as if they have compulsive gambler seminars at the casino, they all seem to learn very quickly how to hide their tracks. Gambling addicts take off work early to get home before the mail gets there so their spouse won't find the bills or they get a post office box or have their bills delivered at work trying to hide their handiwork. They know the name, age of children and birthplace of the person at the payday loan company. They don't answer their cell phones. They sneak away from work so their spouse won't know they have been to the casino. The list is endless of the ways that a gambling addict will find to gamble and to cover up what they are doing. They will beg, borrow and steal to finance their gambling. They will drain the families' savings, 401 Ks, children's college funds, take the equity out of their homes, steal from their employers, charge their credit cards to the maximum, take out new credit cards, borrow from banks, finance companies, payday loan companies, borrow from friends, family and coworkers, they will take the money their kid earned mowing lawns in the summer, all in the delusion that sooner or later they will win enough to pay it all back. The compulsive gambler will only stop gambling when they no longer have access to money. They become liars. They cannot seem to find it in themselves to tell the truth. They will lie to their spouse, children, supervisors, the neighbors, but mostly they lie to themselves. They know they have a problem. They understand they have a problem, but they just keep doing it. The light at the end is that gambling addiction can be treated, although there is debate over how effective treatment is. Gambler's Anonymous and other programs, counseling and time help the gambler with his problem. Gam Anon is helpful for the families. However, once gambling addiction has entered your life, it will never be the same. For the spouse, the trust has been broken. Forever, in the back of your mind, you wonder when it will happen again. Is the gambler gambling, lying, stealing? You wonder, when is it going to start all over again, I didn't know it the last time, will I recognize it this time before it is too late? It is always in the back of your mind when you call and they don't answer their cell phone or when they are a few minutes late getting home. When the alcoholic falls of the wagon, there may be a lot of consequences, but if the gambler falls of the wagon he can take his family into bankruptcy over a weekend bender. Some people wonder why the spouse just doesn't divorce their gambling mate and the answer to that is difficult. There is a plethora of reasons for not leaving, but the reality is that the only hope that many spouses have of getting out of debt is for the gambler to quit gambling and help pay off the bills. Most debt that is acquired by the gambler is seen as "marital debt" and even if the spouse divorces the gambler, they will still have to pay back the debt. Gambling addiction has one of the highest suicide rates of all addictions and this is partially due to the nature of the consequences. With most addictions, the addict can lose everything he had, his family, his job, his self-respect, he can take himself down to having nothing left, zero, zip, nada. However. the gambling addict may have lost all of those things, but his aftermath doesn't stop merely at zero. The gambler may have lost his family, job, self-respect AND may be thousands, tens of thousands or hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt and the only way he knows of to get out of debt is........(insert drum roll) ....................to gamble and win the big one. When the alcoholic quits drinking, he picks up the pieces and moves on, but the gambler may be faced with overwhelming debt that he cannot see a way out of when he quits gambling. Don't despair, many gambling addicts make it through, quit gambling and move on with their lives, but as with any other addiction it can be a life time struggle both for the gambler and the people who love them. Copyright 2007 All material remains the property of the authorhttp://www.oagaa.org/html/who_is_this_person_.htm (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=950980 Mon, 15 Oct 2007 04:00:00 +0100 950980 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2007/10/reflectionsfor-day-october-2007.html October 14"Fundamental progress has to do with the reinterpretation of basic ideas,"wrote Alfred North Whitehead.When we review or ups and downs of our recovery in GA, we can see the truth of that statement.We make progress each time we get rid of an old idea, each time we uncover a character defect, each time we become ready to have that defect removed.We make progress, one day at a time, as we shun that first bet, that first addictive act that could so quickly swerve us from the path of growth onto the path of despair...Do I consider the progress I've made since I came to GA????May I remember that there are a few new ideas in the world, only the old ones reinterpreted and reinstated.May I always be conscious that the big things in life-- like love, brotherhood, God, abstinence from addictive behavior--become more finely defined in each human life.So may the Twelve Steps in recovery be redefined in each of our lives, as we keep in mind that these are the time--tried principles that work.......TODAY I WILL REMEMBERThe Twelve Steps work. (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=950979 Mon, 15 Oct 2007 04:00:00 +0100 950979 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2007/06/you-determine-your-attitude.html Your attitude is not determined by circumstances, but by how you respond to your circumstances.You can respond positively or negatively to any situation.It's how you react to events, not the events themselves, that determines your attitude.Any challenge facing youis not as important as your attitude towards it, for that will determine your success or failure.Things turn out best for the peoplewho make the best of the way things turn out.It's not your position but your disposition that counts. ©2006 by Max SteingartReproduce freely but maintain © notice (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=730707 Sun, 17 Jun 2007 04:00:00 +0100 730707 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2007/04/reflection-for-day.html April 1If we don't want to slip, we'll avoid slippery places. For the gambler that means shunning poker parties and race tracks and anywhere that gambling is taking place. For me, certain emotional situations can also be slippery places; so can indulgence in old ideas, such as a well-nourished resentment that is allowed to build to explosive proportions.Do I carry the principles of the Gamblers Anonymous Program with me wherever I go?TODAY I PRAYMay I learn not to test myself too harshly by "asking for it," by stopping in at the casino, the Bingo hall, or the track. Such "testing" can be dangerous, especially if I am egged on, not only by a craving for the old object of my addictions, but by others still caught in addiction whose moral responsibility has been reduced tozero.TODAY I WILL REMEMBERAvoid slippery places.April 2What causes slips? What happens to a person who apparently seems tounderstand and live the Twelve Step way, yet decides to go out gambling again? What can I do to keep this from happening to me? Is there any consistency among those who slip, any common denominators that seem to apply? We can each draw our own conclusions, but we learn in the Gamblers Anonymous Program that certain inactions will all but guarantee an eventual slip.When a person who has slipped is fortunate enough to return to the Program, do I listen carefully to what he or she says about the slip?TODAY I PRAYMay my Higher Power show me if I am setting myself up to gamble again. May I glean from the experiences of others that the reasons for such a lapse of resolve or such an accident of will most often stem from what I have not done rather than from what I have done. May I "keep coming back" to meetings.TODAY I WILL REMEMBERKeep coming back.April 3 In almost every instance, the returned slipper says, "I stopped going to meetings," or "I got fed up with the same old stories and the same old faces," or "My outside commitments were such that I had to cut down on meetings," or "I felt I'd received the optimum benefits from the meetings, so I sought further help from more meaningful activities." In short, they simply stopped going to meetings. A saying I've heard at Gambers Anonymous hits the nail on the head: "Them that stops going to meetings are not present at meetings to hear about what happens to them that stops going to meetings."Am I going to enough meetings for me?TODAY I PRAYGod keep me on the path of the GA Program. May I never be too tired, too busy, too complacent, too bored to go to meetings. Almost always those complaints are reversed at a meeting if I will just get myself there. My weariness dissapates in serenity. My busyness is reduced to it's rightful proportion. My complacency gives way to vigilance again. Any how can I be bored in a place where there is so much fellowship and joy?TODAY I WILL REMEMBERAttend the meetings.April 4Another common denominator among those who slip is failure to use the tools of the Gamblers Anonymous Program--the Twelve Steps. The comments heard most often are, "I never did work the Steps," "I never got past the First Step," "I worked the Steps too slow," or "too fast" or "too soon". What it boils down to is that these people considered the Steps, but didn't conscientiously and sincerely apply the Steps to their lives.Am I learning how to protect myself and help others?TODAY I PRAYMay I be a doer of the Steps and not a hearer only. May I see some of the common mis-Steps that lead to a fall: being too proud to admit Step one; being to tied to everyday earth to feel the presence of a Higher Power; being over- whelmed by the thought of preparing Step Four, a complete moral and financial inventory; being to reticent to share that inventory. Please God, guide me as I work the Twelve Steps.TODAY I WILL REMEMBERTo watch my steps.April 5 Still another common thread we invariable see among slippers is that many of them felt dissatisfaction with today. "I forgot we live one day at a time," or "I begain to anticipate the future," or "I began to plan results, not just plan." They seemed to forget that all we have is NOW. Life continued to get better for them and, as many of us do, they forgot how bad it had been. They began to think, instead, of how dissatisfying it was compared to what it could be.Do I compare today with yesterday, realizing, that by contrast, what great benefits and blessings I have today?TODAY I PRAYIf I am discourged with today, may I remember the sorrows and hassles of yesterday. If I am impatient for the future, let me appreciate today and how much better it is than the life I left behind. May I never forget the principle of "one day at a time."TODAY I WILL REMEMBERThe craziness of yesterday (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=730708 Fri, 06 Apr 2007 04:00:00 +0100 730708 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2007/03/support-of-friend.html You probably thought you couldn't do it. But somehow, you did. You faced it, admitted you have a problem and you're starting to look for help. You took some steps that started the healing process, and soon your life will be changing: Your relationships may get better, your conscience will be eased, and hopefully your life will seem more appealing. Best of all, you know you're doing the right thing. You'll need encouragement and frequent reminders to keep going on this new and less-than-clearly marked path. It's important to remember, though, that admitting you need help is the hardest part of overcoming an addiction or problem. The more you reveal and share with others, the more likely people will be to expect your life to change. On the one hand, that thought may fill you with the dread and burden of responsibility. After all, if you tell people, they'll expect you to change. Then, if (and when) you relapse, they'll be disappointed in you or even hate you — right? Wrong. The people who truly love you will stick with you as you fight this problem, supporting you both when you change and when you fail. They care about you and want you to succeed. They're probably proud of you — as you should be of yourself — for even having the desire to change. The proverbial "end of the tunnel" may be harder for you to see than for those around you to envision. The point: People are a vital part of the change you're undergoing. You need them. Without them, you will continue to live in your cramped, airless closet of addiction. Without them, your likelihood of failure increases. That's why you need someone to hold you accountable. So what does accountability look like? Evaluate your need for help. Depending on where you are in the recovery process from addiction, you may need more help than an accountability partner can give. Often, the best case scenario is the simultaneous help of a professional counselor and an accountability partner. A professional counselor has in-depth education and training and will only see you periodically; an accountability partner may not have background or experience in counseling but can be available and supportive during times of temptation, challenge and success. If you need the services of a professional counselor, TroubledWith.com offers a free, one-time phone consultation with a licensed Christian counselor, as well as referrals to counselors in your area. Begin by giving an accurate picture of where you are. In the beginning of an accountability partnership, it's critical that you paint an accurate picture for the person who's signed on to help. Unless you let your partner know the core of what's going on, they are powerless to accurately aid you in change. You've got to be on the same page. Don't beat around the bush. The first time you meet with the person who will be helping you, tell them where you are with your addiction and where you want to be. Define for them what role you expect them to play in the changes you hope to make. This first conversation will doubtless be hard, but only when you've trusted a person and put yourself on the line can they really begin to help. Choose a partner wisely. There are no specific requirements — it doesn't have to be a professional counselor. It could be your best friend or a co-worker. But it must be someone trustworthy, mature, willing and available. Caution: It's not usually a good idea to ask your spouse to be your accountability partner. They'll encourage you and notice changes along the way, but this experience will be difficult and it often helps to have a friend who's not as involved and immersed in your life as a spouse. Be totally honest. No hiding. No matter how embarrassing, you share. That, of course, implies that the person in relationship with you will be someone who respects you, knows you're struggling, is willing to help, and loves you. Allow your accountability partner to be honest. Now's the time for you to accept criticism and encouragement without holding back. As you choose a person to hold you accountable, pick someone that will be honest and give you an accurate opinion of the changes you've made and the hurdles you face. At this point, you're weak and need someone strong to hold you up. Meet regularly and face-to-face. Committing to a set time is best. That way, you'll know you have to report on your progress and struggles each and every week. If a set time isn't possible, try to interact with this partner at least once a week. Meeting face-to-face is also crucial. It's harder, but it's more personal and forces you to be more honest and open than by e-mail or phone. Answer hard questions. In the beginning, line up weekly questions. Don't be afraid to be specific. For example, if you're fighting pornography, you might have your accountability partner ask: Have you viewed pornography this week? How many times? What were you doing when you made the choice to view it? These are painful, even somewhat embarrassing, questions, but to overcome your addiction, you must be willing to confront pain and embarrassment. Change with their help. This shouldn't be purely a time of encouragement or purely a time of criticism. You set goals, and you reach them. Timelines don't matter as much as progressive change. Let your accountability partner be your support line, a shoulder to cry on, someone to turn to in weak moments and someone who will love you. I once heard about a college guy who asked his pastor for help with a drinking problem. The pastor began holding him accountable, and they met together weekly. During the first meeting, the pastor promised that within a year, this young student would be a different man. In the beginning, change was a week-by-week process. He managed to stop drinking, raise his GPA and even began to help others with their problems. However, not quite a year later, the young man pledged a fraternity and began drinking again. He stopped showing up for accountability meetings, leaving the pastor sitting alone at IHOP. When he didn't show, the pastor prayed. A few weeks later, the pastor answered his phone to hear weeping. Through tears, the young man asked his pastor to forgive him, achingly recalling that he hadn't made it a year without failure. When he asked, "Can we start over?" the pastor responded, "No, we can start exactly where we left off." What the wise pastor realized was that this relapse had been more of a lesson than any lecture or chastisement. Letting someone hold you accountable for change can be a painful process, but it's a process with opportunities to be loved, rewarded, and ultimately, to change. You've taken the first step. Have courage to keep changing and be confident — you're headed in the right direction. (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=730709 Fri, 09 Mar 2007 05:00:00 +0100 730709 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2007/01/everyone-has-chance-to-be-successful.html People often handle life as they do bad weather.They while away the time waiting for it to stop.Yet the tide of opportunity comes to everyone.Opportunity knocks all the time, but you've got to be ready for it.When your chance comes, you must have the equipment to take advantage of it.The race is not to the swift or the battle to the strong, for time and chance happen to everyone.Take a second look at what appears to be someone's 'good luck.'You'll find not luck but preparation, planning and success-producing thinking.When you're prepared for opportunity your chance for success is sure to come.The season of failure is the best time for sowing the seeds of success. ©2006 by Max SteingartReproduce freely but maintain © notice (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=730710 Tue, 23 Jan 2007 05:00:00 +0100 730710 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2007/01/january-12-reflection-for-day.html When I sit quietly and compare my life today with the way it used to be, the difference is almost beyond belief. But things aren't always rosey; some days are a lot better than others. I tend to accept the bad days more easily on an intellectual level than I do emotionally, or at gut-level. There are no pat answers, but part of the solution surely lies in a constant effort to practice all of the Twelve Steps. Do I accept the fact that my Higher Power will never give me more than I can handle -- one day at a time? Today I Pray That I may receive strength in the knowledge that God never gives us more than we can bear, that I can always, somehow, endure present pain, whereas the trials of a lifetime, condensed into one disastrous moment, would surely overcome me. Thanks to God for giving us only those tribulations that are in proportion to our strength, never destroying us in our frailty. May I remember that fortitude grows out of suffering. Today I Will Remember Present pain is endurable. (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=730711 Sat, 13 Jan 2007 05:00:00 +0100 730711 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2007/01/january-11-reflection-for-day.html January 11 - Reflection for the DayThe experiences of thousands upon thousands of people have proved that acceptance and faith are capable of producing freedom from gambling. When we apply the same principles of acceptance and faith to our emotional problems, however, we discover that only relative results are possible. Obviously, for example, nobody can ever become completely free from fear, anger, or pride. None of us will ever achieve perfect love, harmony, or serenity. We'll have to settle for very gradual progress, punctuated occasionally by very heavy setbacks. Have I begun to abandon my old attitude of "all or nothing?"Today I PrayMay God grant me the patience to apply those same principles of faith andacceptance that are keys to my recovery to the whole of my emotional being. May I learn to recognize the festering of my own human anger, my hurt, my frustration, my sadness. With the help of my Higher Power, may I find appropriate ways to deal with these feelings without doing harm to myself or others.Today I Will RememberFeelings are real -- I will acknowledge them. (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=730714 Fri, 12 Jan 2007 05:00:00 +0100 730714 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2007/01/january-10-reflection-for-day.html Reflection for the Day , January 10th: Since I came to GA, I've become increasingly aware of the Serenity Prayer. I see it on literature covers, the walls of meeting rooms, and in the home of new found friends. "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference." Do I understand the Serenity Prayer? Do I believe in its power and repeat it often? Is it becoming easier for me to accept the things I cannot change? Today I Pray: Grant me that the words of the Serenity Prayer never become mechanical for me or lose their meaning in the lulling rhythms of repetition. I pray that these words will continue to take on new depths of significance as I fit life's realities to them. I trust I may find the solutions, I need in this prayer, which, in its simplicity, encompasses all of life's solutions. Today I Will Remember: Share the Prayer. (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=730715 Thu, 11 Jan 2007 05:00:00 +0100 730715 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2007/01/reflections-for-day.html January 9 - Reflection for the DayIn the past, and sometimes even now, I automatically have said, "Why me?" when I am trying to learn that my first problem is to accept my present circumstances as they are, myself as I am, and the people around me as they are. Just as I finally accepted my powerlessness over gambling, so must I accept my powerlessness over people, places and things.Am I learning to accept life on life's terms?Today I PrayMay I learn to control my urge to control, my compulsion to manage, neaten, organize and label the lives of others. May I learn to accept situations and people as they are instead of as I would like them to be. Thus, may I do away with the ongoing frustrations that a controlling person, by nature, faces continually. May I be entirely ready to have this defect of character removed.Today I Will RememberControl for the controller (me). January 8 - Reflection for the DayToday is the day for which I asked and for which I have been given strength.That in itself is a miracle. The fact that I am alive is the great miracle from which all other miracles will flow, providing I continue to do the things that have brought me this far in my new life.Am I grateful that I have been given this day?Today I PrayMay God's goodness and mercy follow me all the days of my life. May I never cease to wonder at the greatest miracle in my life -- that I am alive, here, on this green earth, and growing healthier with the life-preserving tools I have been given. Since God has chosen me to give me life and to preserve my life, even through the dangers of my gambling addiction, may I always continue to listen for His plan for me. May I always believe in miracles.Today I Will RememberMy life is a miracle.January 7 - Reflection of the DayI'm beginning to see just how unnatural my old life actually was, and that it became increasingly so as my illness progressed. The longer I'm in the GA Program, the more comfortable this new way of life seems. At first, it was impossible for me to extend my hand to a newcomer; such an act was wholly unnatural for me. But it is becoming increasingly easier for me to reach out to another person. Sharing my experience, strength, and hope is becoming a naturalpart of daily living.Have I learned that I can't keep what I've gotten unless I "give it away?"Will I take the time to share today?Today I PrayMay I share my love, my joy, my happiness, my time, my hospitality, my knowledge of things on earth, and my faith in a Higher Power. Even though I may not see the results of my acts of sharing, may I take joy in the acts themselves. May sharing, according to God's plan, become as natural to me as speaking or breathing.Today I Will RememberBe never sparing in caring and sharing.January 6 - Reflection of the DayGamblers Anonymous, wrote Dr. Robert L. Custer in the foreword to the GA Blue Book, is a Program of the Twelve Steps "that's provides a framework of hope, structure, and friendship" for those who have chosen the road to a "successful adaptation to a life without gambling." He adds, "This road can be smooth or rocky, but in any case, it is never a painless journey..." As a recovering compulsive gambler, I can face any discomforts today, knowing that the pain of recovery will never be as acute and desperate as the pain of my gambling days.Am I prepared to see each new day in the GA Program as a time for learning, growing, and making healthy choices?Today I PrayMay I make prudent use of the power of choice that God has given me, to plan wisely, one day at a time, without becoming a slave to apprehension, regret or anxiety. I pray that God's will be done through the exercising of my own will, which He, in His goodness, has given me.Today I Will RememberGod wills my will to be. (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=730717 Wed, 10 Jan 2007 05:00:00 +0100 730717 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2007/01/january-5-reflection-of-day.html January 5 - Reflection of the Day"Today is my lucky day." How often in the past we said that, when it was an empty prophesy. Today those words are real; I am being given a second chance. In my gambling days, I sacrificed every "today" for a dream of some distant tomorrow. Of all that I lost, I grieve most for all those "today's" -- I cannot bring back. But today -- this day -- I have. I will not sacrifice or waste it.Do I truly believe that today is mine, that today I can choose to be happy, to grow, and to learn to live, instead of counting on some pie-in-the-sky day in the far off future?Today I PrayI pray that the colors of this day may not be blurred by muted vagaries of the future or dulled by storm-gray remnants from the past. I pray that my Higher Power will help me choose my actions and concerns out of the wealth of my busyness that each day offers.Today I Will RememberI will not lose for today, if I choose for today. (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=730716 Sat, 06 Jan 2007 05:00:00 +0100 730716 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2007/01/reflection-for-day.html January 5 "Today is my lucky day." How often in the past we said that, when it was an empty prophesy. Today those words are real; I am being given a second chance. In my gambling days, I sacrificed every "today" for a dream of some distant tomorrow. Of all that I lost, I grieve most for all those "today's" -- I cannot bring back. But today -- this day -- I have. I will not sacrifice or waste it.Do I truly believe that today is mine, that today I can choose to be happy, to grow, and to learn to live, instead of counting on some pie-in-the-sky day in the far off future?Today I Pray I pray that the colors of this day may not be blurred by muted vagaries of the future or dulled by storm-gray remnants from the past. I pray that my Higher Power will help me choose my actions and concerns out of the wealth of my busyness that each day offers.Today I Will RememberI will not lose for today, if I choose for today. January 4thFor a good part of my life, I saw things mostly in negative terms. Everything was serious, heavy, or just plain awful. Perhaps now I can truly change my attitude, searching out the winners in the GA Program who have learned how to live comfortably in the real world -- without gambling.If things get rough today, can I take a quiet moment and say to myself, as the philosopher Homer once said, "Bear patiently, my heart -- for you have suffered heavier things"?Today I PrayMay the peace of God that passes all human understanding fill the place within me that once harbored my despair. May an appreciation for living --even for life's trials -- cancel out my old negative attitudes. During heart-heavy moments, help me to remind me that my heart was once much heavier still.Today I Will RememberI am a winner -- in the best sense of the word.January 3 My gambling compulsion is three-fold in that it affects me physically,mentally, and spiritually. As a compulsive gambler, I was totally out of touch,not only with myself, but with reality. Day after miserable day, like a caged animal on a treadmill, I repeated my self-destructive pattern of living. Have I begun to break away from my old ideas? Just for today can I adjust myself to what is, rather than try to adjust everything to my own desires?Today I PrayI pray that I may not be caught up again in the downward, destructive spiral that removed me from myself and from the realities of the world around me. I pray that I may adjust to people and situations as they are, instead ofalways trying, unsuccessfully and with endless frustration, to bend them to my own desires.Today I Will RememberI can change only myself.January 2Before I came to the GA Program, I hadn't the faintest idea of what it was to "Live in the Now." I often became obsessed with things that happened yesterday, last week, or even five years ago. Worse yet, many of my waking hours were spent clearing away the "wreckage of my future." "To me," Walt Whitman once wrote, "every hour of the day and night is an unspeakably perfect miracle."Can I truly believe that in my heart?Today I PrayLet me carry only the weight of twenty-four hours at one time, without the extra bulk of yesterday's regrets or tomorrow's anxieties Let me breathe the blessings of each new day for itself, by itself, and keep my human burden scontained in daily perspective. May I learn the balance of soul that comes through keeping close to God.Today I Will RememberDon't borrow from tomorrow.January 1 In the old days, I saw everything in terms of forever. Endless hours ere spent rehashing old mistakes. I tried to take comfort in the forlorn hope that tomorrow "would be different" As a result, I lived a fantasy life in which happiness was all but non existent. No wonder I rarely smiled and hardly ever laughed aloud. Do I still think in terms of "forever?"Today I PrayMay I set my goals for the New Year not at the year-long mark, but one dayat a time. My traditional New Year's resolutions have been so grandly stated and so soon broken. Let me not weaken my resolve by stretching it to cover"forever" - or even one long year. May I reapply it firmly each newday. May I learn not to stamp my past mistakes with that indelible word, "forever."Instead, may each single day in each New Year be freshened by my new-found hope.Today I Will Remember Happy New Day. (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=730713 Fri, 05 Jan 2007 05:00:00 +0100 730713 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2007/01/guilt.html Guilt"When guilt rears its ugly head confront it, discuss it and let it go. The past is over. It is time to ask what can we do right, not what did we do wrong. Forgive yourself and move on."--Bernie S. Siegel "I have made it a rule of my life never to regret and never to look back. Regret is an appalling waste of energy . . . you can’t build on it; it’s only good for wallowing in."-- Katherine Mansfield "If we don't forgive ourselves for our mistakes, and others for the wounds they have inflicted upon us, we end up crippled with guilt. And the soul cannot grow under a blanket of guilt, because guilt is isolating, while growth is a gradual process of reconnection to ourselves, to other people, and to a larger whole."-- Joan Borysenko "Light burdens borne far become heavy."-- French proverb http://www.thedailyguru.com/higherawareness.htm (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=730712 Tue, 02 Jan 2007 05:00:00 +0100 730712 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2006/12/daily-guru.html Guilt "When guilt rears its ugly head confront it, discuss it and let it go. The past is over. It is time to ask what can we do right, not what did we do wrong. Forgive yourself and move on." --Bernie S. Siegel "I have made it a rule of my life never to regret and never to look back. Regret is an appalling waste of energy . . . you can’t build on it; it’s only good for wallowing in." -- Katherine Mansfield "If we don't forgive ourselves for our mistakes, and others for the wounds they have inflicted upon us, we end up crippled with guilt. And the soul cannot grow under a blanket of guilt, because guilt is isolating, while growth is a gradual process of reconnection to ourselves, to other people, and to a larger whole." -- Joan Borysenko "Light burdens borne far become heavy." -- French proverbhttp://www.thedailyguru.com/higherawareness.htm (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=730718 Tue, 26 Dec 2006 05:00:00 +0100 730718 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2006/12/you-always-have-chance.html Use your imagination and look at things as they can be.You know what you are todaybut not what you may be tomorrow.You can do anything you wish to do, have anything you wish to have,and be anything you wish to be.You don't know what you can really do until you try.All you have to do is to act on your dreams.You have the power within you to do things you never dreamed possible.You would amaze yourself if you did all the things you're capable of doing.This power becomes available to you as soon as you change some of your beliefs.Success begins in your mind. ©2006 by Max SteingartReproduce freely but maintain © notice (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=730719 Sun, 17 Dec 2006 05:00:00 +0100 730719 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2006/12/action-is-required-if-you-want-to-be_16.html The only way to start to improve your life is to start.Once you're sure you're on the right road there is no need to plan your journey too far ahead.Don't burden yourself with doubts and fears as to the obstacles that may bar your progress.You can only take one step at a time.You don't need to know all the answers in advance.Just maintain a clear idea of the goal you want to reach and the answers will come in their own time.If you can get up the courage to begin, you'll have the courage to succeed.It's the job you never start that takes the longest to finish.Go after what you want and you'll get it.Eighty percent of success is showing up. ©2006 by Max SteingartReproduce freely but maintain © notice (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=730720 Sat, 16 Dec 2006 05:00:00 +0100 730720 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2006/11/motivational-messages_22.html There is no sudden leap to greatness.Your success lies in doing day by day.Your upward reach will come from working well and carefully.Good work done little by little becomes great work.The house of success is built brick by brick.Adopt the pace of nature. The secret is patience.A bottle fills drop by drop. ©2006 by Max SteingartReproduce freely but maintain © notice (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=730721 Wed, 22 Nov 2006 05:00:00 +0100 730721 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2006/11/daily-guru_18.html Question:Why do I continue to get angry, and why do I always feel so justified in my anger even though it always makes me feel terrible at a later time?Answer:To be angry is to suffer. It doesn't help anyone to get angry. Anger hurts whoever is angry. It burns. Anger ruins relationships, causes heartache and regret, and devastates health. And yet, in spite of all of these facts, when we are angry, it feels right. Somehow, in some unseen way, anger proves to whoever is experiencing its heated feelings that he or she is right even though, in the eyes of reality, nothing could be further from the truth. Anger feels like it is in your best interest because, at the time of its intrusion into your life, it temporarily fills you with a powerful false sense of self. However, this anger can only exist without your conscious consent or awareness of its being there. So it is good that you are wondering how you can be tricked into feeling bad about anything. The Truth wants you to know that it is never in your best interest to suffer, no matter how inwardly convincing it may feel to you that you will be betraying yourself if you don't. Anger hypnotizes you with a flood of itself. Step back and learn instead to listen to the quiet stream of higher insight that runs softly through your true nature. Let it show you that your anger and suffering proves nothing.©2006 by Max SteingartReproduce freely but maintain © notice (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=730723 Sat, 18 Nov 2006 05:00:00 +0100 730723 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2006/11/quote-of-week.html "My recovery changed when I forever gave up the hope of having a different past."I have spent a lot of time thinking about my past. Alternately feeling sorry for myself or being outraged at the wrongs - real orimagined - that were done to me, a constant theme in my thinking is how much different, better, happier I would be if only I hadn't had these parents, or stepparents, or those siblings, or on and on.But it will never be different. My past will be my past always, and, good or bad, it is uniquely mine. When I got to the program I was taught that in recovery we stop fighting everybody and everything, in other words we surrender. One definition of surrender is to lay down our arms and join the winning side. By surrendering my old feelings about my past, I am free to see the treasure that it really is.By working my program, I am able to make peace with my past, to look at my part and see the lessons and gifts it has to offer. In time, I come to see how valuable my experiences are, and how I can use them to help another. "One's deepest wounds, integrated, become our greatest power." As I heal my past, I begin to see how it can help heal another as well. Today I no longer regret my past, and that is a true miracle.http://www.theWisdomoftheRooms.com (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=730722 Wed, 15 Nov 2006 05:00:00 +0100 730722 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2006/11/daily-guru.html THE HIGHWAY TO SUCCESS IS A TOLL ROADYou must give up something to get whatever you want in life.The greater the value, the greater the sacrifice that will be required.Everything has a price.Nothing worthwhile will come easily to you.Work, continuous work and hard work, is the only way to accomplish the results that last.You pay a price if you want to make things better, and you pay a price for just leaving things as they are.You'll find no success at bargain basement prices. ©2006 by Max SteingartReproduce freely but maintain © notice (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=730727 Mon, 13 Nov 2006 05:00:00 +0100 730727 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2006/11/daily-guru_13.html THE HIGHWAY TO SUCCESS IS A TOLL ROADYou must give up something to get whatever you want in life.The greater the value, the greater the sacrifice that will be required.Everything has a price.Nothing worthwhile will come easily to you.Work, continuous work and hard work, is the only way to accomplish the results that last.You pay a price if you want to make things better, and you pay a price for just leaving things as they are.You'll find no success at bargain basement prices. ©2006 by Max SteingartReproduce freely but maintain © notice (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=730726 Mon, 13 Nov 2006 05:00:00 +0100 730726 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2006/11/daily-guru_116337431509991353.html THE HIGHWAY TO SUCCESS IS A TOLL ROADYou must give up something to get whatever you want in life.The greater the value, the greater the sacrifice that will be required.Everything has a price.Nothing worthwhile will come easily to you.Work, continuous work and hard work, is the only way to accomplish the results that last.You pay a price if you want to make things better, and you pay a price for just leaving things as they are.You'll find no success at bargain basement prices. ©2006 by Max SteingartReproduce freely but maintain © notice (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=730725 Mon, 13 Nov 2006 05:00:00 +0100 730725 http://www.gettingpastgambling.com/2006/11/daily-guru_116337461042584474.html THE HIGHWAY TO SUCCESS IS A TOLL ROADYou must give up something to get whatever you want in life.The greater the value, the greater the sacrifice that will be required.Everything has a price.Nothing worthwhile will come easily to you.Work, continuous work and hard work, is the only way to accomplish the results that last.You pay a price if you want to make things better, and you pay a price for just leaving things as they are.You'll find no success at bargain basement prices. ©2006 by Max SteingartReproduce freely but maintain © notice (Source: Getting Past Gambling) Getting Past Gambling blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=730724 Mon, 13 Nov 2006 05:00:00 +0100 730724