MedWorm.com provides a medical RSS filtering service. Over 6000 RSS medical sources are combined and output via different filters. This feed contains the latest items from the 'NTs Are Weird' source. Mon, 17 Nov 2008 22:52:09 +0100 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=360 A while ago, a commenter on this blog asked about ways of making touch more bearable in an romantic relationship. As autistic people, we are often sensitive to all sorts of sensory input - including touch. Some touches are downright painful, invasive, or otherwise unpleasant. We also have a higher likelihood of having faced abuse, memories of which can be triggered by even the most special person in the world touching us in the wrong way - and it may not be obvious to them that it would be a wrong way. My amazingly creative (and romantic!) girlfriend - who shares many touch issues with me - came up with a wonderful way to get around this problem - to retain some control over how you will be touched, and to have the confidence that the touch of your partner won’t be unwanted touch. At... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1947294 Tue, 11 Nov 2008 04:12:41 +0100 1947294 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=359 A few years ago, I wrote publicly, in several places, about how leadership of the autistic rights movement needs to rest in the hands of autistic people. I was called many things, including egotistical and “anti-ally” by non-autistic people who felt that they were working for the good of autistic people. For this reason, I’ve been holding back on saying these things - but I think I’m strong enough to handle those who will be angered by this idea now. I can make this simple: You aren’t working for our good if you, as a non-autistic person, have to have authority in the movement. Period. I’m not talking about formal positions, titles, and command structure. Nor am I saying you shouldn’t do great things to further the autistic rights movement (please ... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1947295 Sun, 09 Nov 2008 18:42:03 +0100 1947295 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=358 I’m not exactly sure what to call this “condition”, but “Post-Discovery Depression” seemed as clear as anything else I could think of (that is, not very). I’ve experienced, as have most other adult autistics I know. Basically, the discovery process, where a person learns that he is autistic, is almost always followed by fairly severe depression. I don’t know exactly why that is, but I do have some theories, and I also know a few things it is not. First, it is not a result of feeling bad about being autistic - this happens to plenty of people who have a positive outlook on autism. It may be that, for the first time in someone’s life, they have the “answer” to “life, the universe, and everything.” Autism explains how the... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1939222 Thu, 06 Nov 2008 14:14:29 +0100 1939222 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=357 Despite being a bit sick, I just returned from the polls. One of the nice things about Wyoming is that typically we have our act together when it comes to voting - no lines, easy to manage voting technologies, and the all-important voter-verifiable paper trail. I encourage all the adults in the US to go vote today - it is an important right. (Source: NTs Are Weird) NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1933334 Tue, 04 Nov 2008 16:47:25 +0100 1933334 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=356 I watched an online dialog between an autistic advocate and a parent the other day. The conversation started with basic questions, such as “What interventions help?” from the parent. I don’t know that this was ever answered by the advocate, but the parent certainly heard a lot about people in the anti-vax movement. My perception is that the parent had no idea who these people were or why there was such hatred directed towards them. I’ve seen this on both sides of the “does mercury cause autism” debate - strong believers on both sides seem to think that the entire world is wrapped up in this debate, that it is seriously being argued among the masses, not just a few interested people. Well, it’s not. It’s getting argued about as much by the mas... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1924544 Fri, 31 Oct 2008 13:41:52 +0100 1924544 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=355 Today, I am thinking about the most beautiful and wonderful woman in the world, a very nice thought indeed! We’ve been going out a year now - the best year of my life! I love you Alauda! (Source: NTs Are Weird) NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1911394 Tue, 28 Oct 2008 06:01:03 +0100 1911394 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=354 I’ve noticed a trend among some people who have autism, other disability, or even illness. The trend is trying to equate “severity” with “suffering”. The illogic is pretty simple: “If this condition really affected you, you would be miserable. If it affects you more than me, it will make you more miserable than I am.” Yet, this is clearly not the case. Different people respond differently. If I make jokes, am happy, or, conversely, let you know how miserable I feel, that doesn’t really tell you if I’m in pain or not. What it tells you is how I feel emotionally - maybe. But it is possible for some people to feel good emotionally while dealing with severe discrimination, pain, or other problem - that doesn’t make the discrimination ... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1905989 Fri, 24 Oct 2008 13:15:52 +0100 1905989 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=353 Autism ain’t: - Different from Asperger’s - Just another word for “geek” - Something that makes us superior - A horrible condition - A prison sentence - A guarantee of loneliness - Another word for “unemployable” - Worse than death - A reason to pity someone - A made-up excuse to get our way - Completely different, needing different advocacy than other disabilities - More stigmatizing than anything else - The end of someone’s life There are probably tons more. Feel free to add them as comments. (Source: NTs Are Weird) NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1895060 Wed, 22 Oct 2008 01:33:10 +0100 1895060 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=346 In schools throughout the world, students participate in disability awareness days. During these times, students learn “what it is like” to be deaf, blind, a wheelchair user, someone with autism, or a bunch of other things. Some students will, for instance, have a blindfold put on them, and then spend the day learning “what it is like” to be blind. There’s just one problem: This teaches myths and stereotypes rather than reality. What you learn in this type of disability awareness stunt is that, if you have no experience living with a disability, and suddenly become disabled, things suck. What you don’t learn is that many of the things that are hard at first get way easier over time, as you learn ways of interacting with the world. And you also don’... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1837295 Mon, 29 Sep 2008 04:46:26 +0100 1837295 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=345 Let’s say you are one of the following people: Person A: Someone who is not a member of a minority community, but is interested in a minority community’s well-being and want to ensure that you have your right to lead the minority community. Person B: Someone who knows that the minority community, which you are not a member of, is not capable of leading themselves, and thus needs your help. Person C: Someone who disagrees with what the minority community speaks, and desires your own voice to be heard instead of theirs. Well, there’s help! I will tell you how, in just a few easy steps, how to dismiss those pesky people who are actually members of the minority community but disagree with you on something: Step 1: Use the “Political Correctness” card. You can resp... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1825840 Thu, 25 Sep 2008 13:45:43 +0100 1825840 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=320 A while ago, I took an online course on defensive driving that my workplace requires. Supposedly this type of course lowers accident rates (I’d love to see proof of that), which is a good goal I suppose. However, I suspect the real reason for the course is so that a lawyer from my organization can simply say, “We have a comprehensive defensive driving program” should we ever get sued after an accident…but I digress… A key part of the course is an online “assessment” to determine whether or not I possess the critical defensive driving skills that were being taught to me. There was just one problem: the assessment was incredibly badly designed. For instance, it asks, “what is defensive driving?” Does it matter? Does knowing the definition... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1825841 Wed, 24 Sep 2008 13:36:12 +0100 1825841 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=224 A very common question on online forums with US autistic people is whether or not an autistic person can or should be excused from jury duty. In other words, are we good jurors? I’ve served once, although I have been called twice (the other time, the defendant failed to show up, so we were all dismissed). The one I served on was for a relatively short criminal trial (one day), with about 6 hours of deliberations (we couldn’t agree for quite a while). It was a tough job, but one that I felt as prepared and able to do as I imagine others on the jury felt - that is, realizing it is very serious work and we are fallible humans, but realizing equally that everyone else is too. One of the common concerns autistic people have is that we are bad at reading facial expression. This isn&#... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1815387 Mon, 22 Sep 2008 13:39:35 +0100 1815387 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=342 This inspiration for this topic came from a blog entry on AutismVox, where a key question is asked: should non-disabled people play disabled people in movies? I would love to see talent among disabled people actually recognized. However, not just in playing disabled parts (although we should be playing our own people - just as whites shouldn’t play blacks). I’d like to see us actually have parts other than “bitter crip at war with herself [it usually is a her] to cope with her disability” or “evil bad guy” or “someone overcoming the struggle of disability”. I imagine I have views similar to any other minority - I imagine everyone gets sick of seeing their roles typecast in such a way to promote inaccurate stereotypes. There are lots of parts ... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1811356 Sat, 20 Sep 2008 21:23:07 +0100 1811356 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=341 I’ve seen, in myself, and in other autistic people, a tendency to get caught in what I’m calling “perfection loops” for lack of a better term. These “loops” are basically times when we try to do something perfectly. So, I might cook a meal for myself, taking extreme time in measuring the ingredients perfectly, setting the temperature exactly (measuring it with a thermometer for good measure), watching the clock carefully, cleaning the plates perfectly, etc. Sounds good, right? Not really. The problem with this is that instead of taking 15 minutes for me to cook my very simple meal, like it takes nearly everyone else on earth, it now might take me two hours. Sure, my meal is better - but is it 1 hour and 45 minutes better? Probably not. I’ve seen th... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1798231 Tue, 16 Sep 2008 13:19:19 +0100 1798231 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=340 In my last post about Sarah Palin, I talked about how the focus by her campaign seems to be on children, while ignoring adults. I’m seeing that on the autism blogosphere, too. And that upsets me even more than some politician doing it. When debating Sarah Palin, I’ve seen lots of talk about special education funding and her support/non-support for it. (Unfortunately, there has been a lot of misinterpretation of the Alaskan budget - but that shouldn’t be a surprise particularly, as even the legislature probably doesn’t understand it!) I’ve not seen even one post talking about the length of the waiting list for adult services or funding of those services. This is a state issue, however, as the waiver programs require a committment of state (not just federal) fun... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1770625 Sat, 06 Sep 2008 15:28:37 +0100 1770625 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=339 Governor Palin, I note that you said, at the Republican National Convention, “To the families of special needs children all across this country, I have a message for you. For years you’ve sought to make America a more welcoming place for your sons and daughters and I pledge to you that if we’re elected, you will have a friend and advocate in the White House”. I have one question: If you want America to be a more welcoming place for the kids, are you intentionally or accidentally forgetting about those of us who used to be kids, but now are adults? After all, we - disabled adults - struggled with America being less than fully welcoming for years. One large reason for that is the tendency to see disability, especially developmental disability, as a childhood problem. ... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1763987 Thu, 04 Sep 2008 17:36:19 +0100 1763987 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=335 On a list I’m on, there’s a lot of talk about how to respond to hate speech. As many readers know, what one would think is a non-controversial idea - that autistics have a right to enjoy life, communicate their experiences, be free from cruel or unusual “treatment”, and be treated as full members of the human race (not lesser or partial beings) - is in fact quite controversial to some. We’ve been called sub-human, empty shells, and damaged. We’ve been told that it would be a better world if people like us did not exist, and even that it would be more human to murder us before we “knew what was going on”. This is hate speech, plain and simple, and must not be tolerated. But there are tons of ways of responding. The responses need to vary with ... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1754778 Tue, 02 Sep 2008 13:24:24 +0100 1754778 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=338 I just returned from a government technology manager conference. At this, I noticed a change in attitudes. Specifically, people were talking about the need for telecommunications (network, telephone, and video conferencing) capability to be extend from government offices to worker homes, to allow telecommuting. The primary reason for this change is, of course, the desire to save energy. But it has some other pretty big benefits - for instance, most workers would prefer to work at home (or at least close to home) rather than driving a long ways to work (and it isn’t always possible to “live close to work” if you are a member of a family). It increases the number of available workers by allowing far-away workers to be employed. Many people will trade getting rid of commutin... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1739263 Fri, 29 Aug 2008 04:07:30 +0100 1739263 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=337 Do you get grouchy when you are sick? I suspect that 90% or more of the world’s population shares this particular trait with me. I also suspect that the majority of the world gets grouchy when in pain, grouchy when hungry, and grouchy when tired. Yet this same type of reaction, expressed by an autistic person, is often considered an “out of proportion” reaction. I’ll give an example. Let’s say that I, after having to listen to a radio playing in the background for 5 minutes, scream, “SHUT THAT DAMN RADIO OFF!!!” Now, if that was the only thing I was reacting to, that would quite likely be a reaction that didn’t fit the circumstances. However, what people might not realize is that I’ve spent an entire day coping with sensory input that h... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1734073 Tue, 26 Aug 2008 01:22:57 +0100 1734073 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=336 I keep seeing people define autism as a “social” condition. It is not. Yes, autism affects how autistic people socialize. We don’t do it like neurotypicals. But that isn’t the root or sole effect of autism, nor is it even enough for a diagnosis. Having a hard time socially is something many, if not most, of us experience. But many people without autism have a hard time socially, too. There is no one thing that every autistic has, that distinguishes autism from anything else. Instead, autism is defined by people having several of a set of characteristics - not all the characteristics, but enough to be significant, and enough to distinguish autism from many other neurological differences. Having just one characteristic (for instance, “social trouble”) is n... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1720394 Wed, 20 Aug 2008 23:05:38 +0100 1720394 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=334 I got through reading a bunch of comments to a news story, regarding whether or not people with disabilities should be able to be part of society (the “main” society, not some sub-part hidden behind walls). In the end, it was clear: there are two views. The first is that the human race has a duty to everyone to at least try to find a place for people that allows inclusion, not segregation, from society. The second is that this duty only exists while it isn’t upsetting or inconvenient. This second view is often justified on the basis of “safety”. I am constantly amazed how non-violence acts can be treated as if they were violent, simply because someone says, “Well, they do scare me, and I have a right to not be scared.” Actually, no, you don’t... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1711784 Sun, 17 Aug 2008 17:57:37 +0100 1711784 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=333 I had a pretty happy moment a a couple of weeks ago: The mobile home I used to own is now someone else’s. For some reason, this was just incredibly hard for me to get rid of. But, as of now, it is no longer mine. The new owner is thrilled with the trailer - it is better than where she moved from and she’s getting it fixed up a bit to be more energy efficient with new windows. Regular readers of this blog will know how good it feels for me to have gotten rid of this trailer. I no longer own any property I can’t personally move. (Source: NTs Are Weird) NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1704772 Thu, 14 Aug 2008 01:01:50 +0100 1704772 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=332 Right now, you can watch almost any Olympic sport on TV. But there’s one thing you can’t watch: the Paralympics, at least if you are in the USA. Strange that I can watch Rhythmic Gymnastics, for instance, but I cannot watch Goalball. The strnage thing is…I’d bet more people would be interested in watching Goalball than in watching Goalball than Rhythmic Gymnastics (no disrespect intended for the athletes or fans of Rhythmic Gymnastics - that is certainly not an easy sport). So, here’s the questions to the readers: When and where are the Paralympics? Can you watch any Paralympic sport (preferably live) in your country? Which sport? How would you watch it? There’s also an assignment for the readers: let whatever station is broadcasting the Olympics in your... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1696284 Sun, 10 Aug 2008 14:45:41 +0100 1696284 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=331 Self-injury can be very disconcerting and upsetting to watch. Nobody likes to see someone else causing themselves physical pain, and there are very frequent questions about “How do I stop this” from parents and friends of people who self-injure. Self-injury also seems to justify nearly any treatment and enable the bypass of ethical standards, in the name of treatment - I obviously don’t agree with this, even some unethical treatment does stop self-injury. A lot of the issue with self-injury is understanding why it is occurring. I suspect everyone who self-injures is a bit different, and has different reasons, but I do think there are some trends, and, even more importantly, I think self-injury shows that something is very wrong in someone’s life. Just getting them t... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1660833 Mon, 28 Jul 2008 13:38:26 +0100 1660833 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=330 As happened in my most recent post, lots of people assume that a social model of disability is incompatible with the idea that there are ways of helping people interact with the world as a whole, without necessarily changing the entire world. I believe this this was expressed by telling me that I only believe in “being nice to [autistics] and bringing [autistics] comfortable surroundings” - a common, but wrong, view of what the social model of disability says. I’ll mention a few things that can help many autistic people - really help, not just act as a placebo for a parent or, worse, cause harm. I won’t be mentioning things that require 40 hours of work for a child or any therapy intended to counter “toxicity”, as these have plenty of scientific and eth... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1642723 Mon, 21 Jul 2008 13:59:53 +0100 1642723 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=329 I’ve seen lots of writing lately about the horrors of the anti-vaccine crowd and scientifically bogus autism treatments. While I am also against these things, I may not be against them for the same reason as others - and I think we are creating a dangerous situation if our primary problem with the anti-vaccine crowd and other scientifically bogus treatment promoters is the unscientific nature of their work. Sure, the unscientific nature is an issue. And we are right to speak against that. But we better be careful. There very well could be scientifically valid “treatments” one day that still demean the person with autism - or maybe the treatments make us “indistinguishable”, and actually do that, but at great personal cost. I don’t think that’s what... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1634978 Thu, 17 Jul 2008 12:54:35 +0100 1634978 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=328 I noticed something very strange when I went to Autreat this year: it was fairly easy, and not very overloading. There are a few reasons for this - first, I didn’t do quite as much as I usually do at Autreat. But that’s not enough to explain why I felt I almost always had energy to participate and interact with others, while in the past, for large chunks of time, I did not have this energy. It was held in a very nice location, very well suited to my particular type of autism, but, once again, that isn’t enough to explain it either, as the other venues suited me well too. I certainly came to Autreat a bit less stressed than I had in the past, as my life situation is fairly stable. But, once again, that isn’t enough to explain this either. Nor is the combination of th... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1605965 Thu, 10 Jul 2008 13:45:45 +0100 1605965 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=327 My girlfriend and I recently returned from a two week roadtrip, including several days at Autreat. I’ve been going to Autreat for several years. I couldn’t quite explain why I enjoy it so much - there is certainly imperfections about it, like any gathering, but I finally figured out that it must be the group of people that attend and how comfortable I feel in that group. My girlfriend, who attended for the first time this year, also enjoyed herself, saying that she really felt part of a group of people for the first time in her life. We spent a lot of time talking about it on the way home from Autreat, trying to figure out the right words to describe it. I still don’t know them, but I think the words “family reunion” come closest to describing what it is like ... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1575498 Thu, 03 Jul 2008 18:07:11 +0100 1575498 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=310 In a previous blog post, I referenced employment being denied to people without prior job experience, as an example when a negative outcome may not be the result of prejudice towards disability, but something else (in this case, something that would have happened whether or not the person was disabled). Some comments asked, “How do people get jobs if everything requires experience?” The short answer is: It is hard, but not everything requires experience either. I’ll explain how I got to my current position, in the computer field, but I don’t want readers to lose track of two keys: persistence and luck. I have applied for dozens of jobs I didn’t get, especially early in my career when I was willing to do almost anything computer-related. Heck, it probably took ... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1563975 Wed, 02 Jul 2008 13:11:19 +0100 1563975 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=326 Every year, an Ugly Dog Contest is held. This year’s pick?  A one-eyed, three-legged dog. One might ask…what does this say about people’s view of disability? If a dog was picked for this based on what sex the dog was, I suspect it wouldn’t be nearly as funny to many people. Interesting. That said, personally I think the pick was pretty cute. (Source: NTs Are Weird) NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1536716 Sun, 22 Jun 2008 01:44:04 +0100 1536716 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=325 An article in Harvard Business School Working Knowledge details the Dutch company Specialisterne. This company focuses on software testing, using autistic workers. They have found autistic workers often have very strong software testing skills. The article assumes that this is due to “routine”, rather than “creative”, work. I’m not quite sure that is the case - I think it is more likely that it picks up on the autistic strength to see the details and the whole at the same time. Many autistic people seem to be able to hold a huge amount of details together at once, without as much need to “group” them into a higher level object. We don’t miss the forest for the trees, we see the forest because we see the trees. It’s not a better way of t... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1526340 Tue, 17 Jun 2008 01:21:46 +0100 1526340 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=324 If you interact with others, online or off, long enough, you’ll see personal crusades against “political correctness.” Of course “political correctness” gets defined differently by everyone for, let’s say this gently, political purposes. So it can be hard to know what is being fought against. But usually the political purpose is simply, “Damn it, I’m not wrong.” In other words, it’s about ego. It’s one thing to debate what words should be used to describe people (provided of course that the people being described have most of the say). It’s quite another to dismiss other people’s views by using one-liners and calling them “political correctness” however. Words are important. Not because it truly matte... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1502632 Mon, 09 Jun 2008 13:19:45 +0100 1502632 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=321 I’m going to officially (well, as official as this unofficial can) declare today “Break a Stereotype Day!” So, today, as you are going about your business, find a stereotype to break. It doesn’t need to be an autism-related stereotype, although it is fine if it is. It doesn’t need to be a “big” stereotype either, sometimes the small things are where the real prejudice waits. It just has to be a stereotype that people apply to people like you. Once you break one, tell someone about it - you can do so as a comment to this post if you want, but you can also write about it elsewhere or just call up a friend and talk to them about it. That way your stereotype-breaking does even more: it not only will affect people when they see you doing it, but it will... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1478046 Fri, 30 May 2008 13:38:19 +0100 1478046 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=322 I’ve received several requests to use my writings for various purposes. I’ll reply to everyone on this blog: You are welcome to use my writing, provided you don’t use it to support a pro-cure position and you attribute it to Joel Smith. A link to my site or blog in the reproduced material would be nice. (Source: NTs Are Weird) NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1478047 Thu, 29 May 2008 23:59:15 +0100 1478047 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=318 For years, the standard argument against inclusion of any type has been “it will harm ‘innocent’ people.” For instance, in the US, the argument against allowing openly gay people into the military is, essentially, it will lower the moral of the troops.  In other words, it will cause others to feel bad if gays are included.  And a soldier who is offended by being in the same army as a gay would, thus, be “harmed” by not having to correct his prejudice.  In this case, the right of the gay person to serve his country is considered less important than the rights of the offended anti-gay soldier. We’ve seen the same argument whenever a group home tries to create a new home in a residential neighborhood.  While some argue about how much more dangerou... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1467023 Sat, 24 May 2008 22:43:14 +0100 1467023 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=316 I’m watching arguments for and against the expulsion of an autistic teenager from a church. As a Christian, I would suggest the Church seriously take a look at Christian doctrine - 1 Corinthians 6:1-7 is pretty clear: a church should not need the law to resolve an internal dispute. But this is not a blog about Christian doctrine, but rather about disability. So, I’ll move on. Every account of this incident in the media has mentioned one thing: that the child weighs 225 pounds (well, not every account - some list his weight as 235 pounds). In other areas, facts are missing from some accounts. But every account thinks the child’s weight is a huge factor, even accounts that don’t mention - at all - the child’s acts or behavior. Let me ask this: Why? Is it perhaps... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1458606 Wed, 21 May 2008 13:07:56 +0100 1458606 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=315 I wrote about autism “gurus” previously - you know, the people peddling secret knowledge of dark conspiracies. There’s another formulaic approach to autism - it isn’t always sold as secret knowledge. The approach is, essentially, that happiness can be achieved for an autistic person if she follows a given set of rules. She needs to follow specific scripts to get employment, friendship, and romantic relationships. And, if she gets these things, she’ll suddenly be happy. There’s a couple problems with this theory. First, having a job or a romantic relationship isn’t necessarily going to make your life better. I realize that someone without a these things may very much be miserable and want them - it’s one of the biggest things we have to work t... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1451878 Mon, 19 May 2008 13:40:38 +0100 1451878 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=121 Autism seems to attract a disproportionally large number of “gurus”. For instance, we have doctors peddling their “detoxification” treatments - which require exact adherence to the wisdom of the guru, uh, doctor’s orders (you’re not supposed to notice that few of the doctors peddling detoxification agree on how to do detoxification, nor do most mainstream doctors think there is a shred of support for detoxification of autistics as a treatment - the GURU’s wisdom is what is important, and it must be done exactly his way!). We have diets that must be adhered to EXACTLY. If your child doesn’t start speaking, doesn’t become academically and socially successful, and doesn’t always have perfectly formed feces, then it must be because yo... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1446161 Fri, 16 May 2008 13:27:08 +0100 1446161 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=313 There are a lot of reasons why someone might not use language “normally”. Yet, despite this, it is often assumed that there are two options for someone to communicate: the “normal” way and a given person’s favored solution. I’ve seen this two option approach not just from non-disabled people, but also from people with communication disability (the second option, in that case, is often their option). I’ve also seen a lot of armchair language experts, who haven’t had the benefit of reading even the most basic of literature on communication disabilities - and thus are condemned to reinvent the wheel poorly. Unfortunately, sometimes these armchair language experts are someone’s only hope for communication - so when inferior solutions are ch... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1429106 Thu, 08 May 2008 16:03:25 +0100 1429106 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=312 As I watch the disability world, especially the autistic world, I see a rather disturbing trend that reverses much of the work disability advocates over the years have done - a desire to get things as a result the public’s pity. Sometimes, it is used to such an extreme that some people truly appear unable to grasp the distinction between someone feeling pity for them and someone feeling love for them. Most of the disabled world has fought against the “I’m disabled, feel sorry for me and give me stuff because this is horrible” by instead saying, “Hey, I have the right to the chance to enjoy life, I don’t have to be miserable. But I will be unless the world interacts differently with me.” There’s a huge difference between those attitudes. In th... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1423289 Tue, 06 May 2008 14:01:54 +0100 1423289 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=234 Autistic people face tremendous prejudice in the world. We might not be hired by an employer, simply because we disclose we are autistic. We are bullied in school. We have to fight for our right to eat, if we dare negotiate the world of social services (our other option is often starvation). We are subject to forced, involuntary confinement - and a world that understands that, “of course”, locking more people up in institutions is a good thing (and refuses to understand that there are other ways of meeting the needs of people and society).  We aren’t believed when we tell others about our problems. We are even sometimes murdered, simply for the crime of being different. So, I don’t mean to dismiss these things - they are real examples of prejudice in the world, and... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1405401 Mon, 28 Apr 2008 23:33:24 +0100 1405401 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=309 For many of us, accommodations help us function in the world. For some of us, there simply isn’t any way to interact in the world without the appropriate, and active, removal of barriers (in other words, “accommodation”). For others, we might be able to function with the barrier in place, but only at great personal cost. So, we seek to remove the barrier that is in our way. Yet, despite our need for accommodation, there are many reasons we don’t get what we need. Certainly prejudice plays a huge part in this, but it isn’t necessarily the only reason. There are four reasons I’ll point out here: 1. If we don’t know what the need is, it is hard for someone else to provide an accommodation. You are much more likely to have success with your disabled st... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1393775 Wed, 23 Apr 2008 13:08:56 +0100 1393775 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=308 I went shopping yesterday at the local grocery store. I noticed they did some minor remodeling since I was last there - in particular, they had a sign on the front door indicating the store was wheelchair accessible. As a disabled person (who does not use a wheelchair), I take every victory I can get for disability rights. And a store advertising its’ accessibility is certainly a good thing - it’s a business decision for them, and it shows that they see the value in taking our money (it is amazing how many businesses don’t want money from disabled people). (Oh, yes, us autistic people are disabled! But that’s another debate!) So, I was feeling pretty good as I went into the store, even considering sending the store a letter that I noticed (the grocery business is hi... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1370804 Mon, 14 Apr 2008 17:24:20 +0100 1370804 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=307 Most of us think we’re morally right, or at least a tiny bit morally superior, to at least some other people. There are whole theologies and ethical frameworks built around the implication of what this means, and I am woefully unqualified to give you all the answers here, so I’m not going to do that. But it is useful to recognize that very few people see themselves as truly bad people - even truly bad people (in my eyes) probably don’t see themselves that way. Perhaps this explains why personal experience is so often used to debate autistic advocates’ points of view. You can spot the personal experience very easily. The first thing that will happen is someone will state that they either worked or lived with an autistic person. The next thing they will do is give an ... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1369133 Sun, 13 Apr 2008 15:20:40 +0100 1369133 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=305 Autistic people don’t have social skills - well, that’s the conventional thinking anyhow. Of course this assumes a few things…such as the existence of a coherent group of things you can call “social skills” and the idea that “neurotypical” social skills are the only kinds of social skills. Of course nearly any autistic person knows that there are plenty of “socially skilled” neurotypicals who lack the basic skills needed to work with autistic people. Yet, if an interaction between one of these people and one of us (autistic people) goes sour, it is assumed that the problem must be the autistic person’s social skills - and almost never a lack of flexibility and social finesse on the part of the neurotypical. As for the idea that we... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1344339 Wed, 02 Apr 2008 02:14:41 +0100 1344339 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=304 At work, there is a sign that says something along the lines of: “If the worst thing a man can be called is a woman, what does that say about society’s attitude towards women?” The sign makes a good point. However, there’s an equivalent happening in our very own community - the worst thing you can call an autistic, apparently, is retarded. My girlfriend pointed this out to me initially - she noticed that in much of the criticism of remarks made by a TV show character, a character who called autistic people “retards”, the focus wasn’t on the offensive nature of the term “retards” to anyone (including people labeled as mentally retarded), but rather that we weren’t mentally retarded. It seemed to her (and me) vitally important for m... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1296108 Wed, 12 Mar 2008 04:35:11 +0100 1296108 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=303 Anyone who has worked even one day in a customer service job knows that the saying, “The Customer is Always Right,” was clearly created by someone with no actual experience working with customers! The customer is most certainly not always right. In autism circles, there’s an equivalent though: The parent is not always right either. And, any autistic person who has parents (I imagine that’s most of us, except those of us changelings that were dropped off by aliens in place of “real” kids) knows that sometimes parents screw up, too. Sometimes even in big ways. I imagine most neurotypicals can think of things their parents screwed up, too. Screwing up while raising a kid isn’t always a horrible thing. Certainly, having ideal parents who never make the... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1289311 Sun, 09 Mar 2008 15:59:27 +0100 1289311 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=301 I’ve been quite busy lately, which is why I haven’t said much on the blog. Among other things, I was hired into a new job, where I’ll be supervising a team of 9 people doing computer network design, implementation, and operations. I’m very excited about the job, and am looking forward to the challenge. Of course somebody somewhere will need to revoke my autism license. After all, surely being part of management violates at least one stereotype…as does a continuing relationship with a truly amazing and beautiful woman! (Source: NTs Are Weird) NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1266616 Fri, 29 Feb 2008 01:51:05 +0100 1266616 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=299 One of the most pervasive thoughts about autism is that autistics are “concrete” thinkers, who can’t think “abstractly”. The idea that concrete, and a lack of abstract, thought is a core trait of autism is directly contrasted by my life experience and the life experience of many other autistic people. Edsger Dijkstra wrote “The Humble Programmer” in the October, 1972 edition of Communications of the Association of Computing Machinery. While the entire article is quite fascinating to read (the best quote is that, by the end of the 1970s, computer software systems “will be virtually free of bugs” - a prediction which has clearly not yet come true), it contains some interesting thoughts on abstraction: “We all know the only mental to... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1199998 Mon, 04 Feb 2008 17:17:21 +0100 1199998 http://thiswayoflife.org/blog/?p=298 I’m not a curebie. I don’t want a cure for autism. I don’t want a cure for autism-light, or autism-heavy, or the kind that has whatever horrible symptom that a curebie would mention (and I’ll note that the “horrible symptoms” talked about by curebies usually have nothing to do with autism, but even if they did it would not be a reason to cure autism). That said, comparisons between autism curebies and Nazis wanting a “Final Solution” (what they called the mass extermination of many kinds of people, the majority of which were Jews) are a bit off-base. There’s a huge difference between wanting a cure for autism and wanting an autistic person dead. Sure, I don’t like either possibility, and certainly any “cure” that exist... NTs Are Weird blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=1198716 Mon, 04 Feb 2008 04:20:14 +0100 1198716