MedWorm provides a medical RSS filtering service. Over 6000 RSS medical sources are combined and output via different filters. This feed contains the latest medical blog items that have been tagged with 'esteem'. Sat, 03 Sep 2011 01:57:15 +0100 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=5181902&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F08%2F30%2Fring-the-bells-that-still-can-ring-letting-go-of-perfectionism%2F Of all of the concerns clients bring to therapy, perfectionism can be one of the most relentless and the most difficult to overcome. It shows up under any number of guises, from the more mundane to more serious versions: “I’m not going to try to learn how to waterski because I know I won’t be any good at it.” “Anything less than an A is not a good enough grade.” “I need to punish myself for not being perfect.” Perfectionists engage in multiple problematic thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. They tend to fear failure, disapproval, and making mistakes. Sometimes they fear success. They overemphasize “shoulds” and engage in all-or-nothing thinking. They constantly pressure themselves to succeed. A shameful belief about inner “badness” often is at the core of pe... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=5181902 Tue, 30 Aug 2011 16:51:17 +0100 5181902 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=5174614&cid=t_165154_87_f&fid=39187&url=http%3A%2F%2Fgetbetterhealth.com%2Fthe-beneficial-effect-of-laughter-on-your-health%2F2011.08.29 I stumbled upon the article ‘Laughter: gender-specific variations’ in Revista Clínica Española (‘Spanish Clinical Journal’) and I can’t help thinking about the need for taking this into account to improve doctor-patient relationships. The text can actually be read as a guide to understand how every person laughs and how to use it in clinical practice. Table 1. Laughter effect on health (more…) *This blog post was originally published at Diario Medico* (Source: Better Health) Better Health blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=5174614 Mon, 29 Aug 2011 14:00:27 +0100 5174614 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=5169573&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F08%2F27%2Fzimbardos-infamous-prison-experiment-where-the-key-players-are-now%2F It’s arguably one of the most controversial experiments. It all started in the basement of the psychology building at Stanford University on August 17, 1971 after psychologist Phil Zimbardo and colleagues took an ad out in the paper stating: “Male college students needed for psychological study of prison life. $15 per day for 1-2 weeks.” Over 70 people volunteered for the Stanford Prison Experiment. Twenty-four healthy, smart college-aged men were picked and randomly assigned either to be a guard or a prisoner. The aim of the study was to explore the psychology of prison life and how specific situations affect people’s behavior. But the experiment didn’t last very long — six days to be exact. Zimbardo was forced to pull the plug because of the disturbing behavior of the guard... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=5169573 Sat, 27 Aug 2011 12:04:17 +0100 5169573 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=5159199&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F08%2F25%2Fto-heal-after-an-affair-and-rebuild-the-relationship%2F “For many people, an affair is deeply traumatizing [and] some marriages can’t recover from it,” said Jason Seidel, PsyD, founder and director of The Colorado Center for Clinical Excellence in Denver. But if you decide to work on your relationship post-affair, you must accept a hard truth: Another affair can happen. This is the paradox of healing, Seidel said. Often, partners who’ve been cheated on will demand full access to their spouse’s email, cell phone records, Facebook and other accounts (or they’ll sneak around to get the access), he said. They see this as legitimate and essential to helping reestablish trust in the relationship. A common belief is “How could I ever trust you again unless you give me full access?” While this thinking is understandable, it simply doesn... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=5159199 Thu, 25 Aug 2011 12:40:21 +0100 5159199 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=5159654&cid=t_165154_136_f&fid=36032&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.everydayhealth.com%2Fblog%2Flife-with-breast-cancer%2Fgood-character-or-great-body-what-are-we-teaching-our-kids%2F When I was a teenager, all the girls my age were concerned about the size of their breasts, their weight, and how they looked. Thirty years later, teenage girls are still obsessed with the same thing. How sad — if only young women were more interested in becoming intelligent, caring human beings! Not that these young women don’t care about both their bodies and global issues, it is just that body image has such an effect on how they feel about themselves and can even impact what they accomplish with their education and careers. Breast cancer has a dual effect on women who are diagnosed. On the one hand it affects our wellbeing and health, but on the other it impacts how we feel about ourselves as women especially because of the disfigurement of our breasts. I wonder if it would be ... Life with Breast Cancer blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=5159654 Wed, 24 Aug 2011 18:56:04 +0100 5159654 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=5159553&cid=t_165154_131_f&fid=34989&url=http%3A%2F%2Ffeeds.b5media.com%2F%7Er%2Fb5media%2FGeneticsHealth%2F%7E3%2FaiMUWkBACcE%2F Think you’re the shit? If you spend a lot of time on Facebook, you are likely to be someone who thinks the world of yourself and spends a great deal of time admiring all of your, well, admirable qualities, according to a new study. But, not so fast, underneath that self-absorption, you may also lack the very self-confidence you pretend to exude. The research done at York University in Canada looked at 100 college-aged students and examined their personal Facebook page while rating their narcissistic tendencies. The researchers found that individuals who are more self-centered and who have lower self-esteem were proven to check their Facebook page more often. They also tended to stay on their page longer and promote themselves more via status updates, photos, and links to other person... Genetics and Health blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=5159553 Fri, 19 Aug 2011 21:07:17 +0100 5159553 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=5159656&cid=t_165154_136_f&fid=36032&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.everydayhealth.com%2Fblog%2Flife-with-breast-cancer%2Flove-enough-to-find-a-cure-for-breast-cancer%2F My husband and I structured this vacation to be leisurely and unplanned. This gives us lazy mornings drinking coffee and exploring the view of the Blue Ridge Mountains off the deck of the condo we are staying in. It also means we didn’t get upset over the stormy weather that kept us inside a little longer Thursday morning. We got to watch “Good Morning America,” which I haven’t had the pleasure of seeing for months. I was wonderfully surprised when we tuned in to find host Robin Roberts introducing a music video that she appeared in for Martina McBride’s new song, “I’m Gonna Love You Through It.” Martina’s new song is about breast cancer and the people we love — or those who love us — who are going through it. It’s an emotional tribute to br... Life with Breast Cancer blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=5159656 Fri, 19 Aug 2011 13:54:04 +0100 5159656 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=5125806&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F08%2F13%2Fthe-idiots-guide-to-dealing-with-idiots%2F Idiots. The world is full of them. How hard it is for us, non-idiots, to put up with them. But to get our jobs done, our kids fed, and our pets groomed, we must deal with them. Idiots come in many shapes, forms, and types, but the ones that frustrate me the most are those who don’t believe in any form of mental illness. These creatures maintain that all mood disorders are cute, creative stories crafted by persons who enjoy obsessing, ruminating, and crying their eyes out… a wealthy bunch who can’t think of anything better to do than come up with a make-believe tale about a few neurons wandering around the limbic system afraid to ask for directions, just like Moses. We must tune out the idiots to achieve any kind of sanity or serenity. But how? Here are four ways that have work... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=5125806 Sat, 13 Aug 2011 11:07:11 +0100 5125806 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=5118712&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F08%2F09%2Ffacebook-tied-to-poor-mental-health-in-teens-kids%2F You know it’s a good time of the year for psychology “news” when the American Psychological Association holds its annual convention. Why? Because they push out a bunch of sexy press releases about presentations at the conference. Case in point, “Social Networking’s Good and Bad Impacts on Kids,” a presentation that presents a seemingly-random selection of research findings about social networking websites like Facebook from the past few years. This quickly gets turned into an exclusive focus on the negative aspects of the talk — “Facebook tied to poor mental health in teens: What parents must know” (CBS News), “Too Much Technology Breeds Health Problems in Teens” (Patch.com), and of course the inevitable, “Is constant &#82... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=5118712 Tue, 09 Aug 2011 21:43:50 +0100 5118712 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=5103517&cid=t_165154_151_f&fid=35818&url=http%3A%2F%2Frecoveryissexy.com%2Fco-dependent-relapse%2F A Checklist of Symptoms Leading to Co-dependent Relapse: Co-dependent : A Person who has let someone else’s behavior affect him or her and is obsessed with controlling others behaviour Denial Patterns: I have difficulty identifying what I am feeling I minimize, alter, or deny how I truly feel. I perceive myself as completely unselfish and dedicated to the well-being of others. Low Self-esteem Patterns: I have difficulty making decisions. I judge everything I think, say, or do harshly, as never “good enough.” I am embarrassed to receive recognition and praise or gifts. I do not ask others to meet my needs or desires. I value others’ approval of my thinking, feelings, and behaviors over my own. I do not perceive myself as a lovable or worthwhile person. Compliance Patterns: I c... Recovery Is Sexy.com blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=5103517 Sat, 06 Aug 2011 15:48:00 +0100 5103517 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=5096343&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F08%2F03%2Ftrue-beauty-is-found-underneath-the-skin-an-interview-with-susanne-veder-berger%2F Since birth, Susanne Veder Berger was taught to hide herself, to cover the six-inch “port-wine stain” that dominated nearly the entire left side of her face. (Doctors call the condition “naevus flammeus,” a vascular birthmark resulting from deep dilated capillaries below the surface of the skin.) When Susanne was only four years old, she was taught how to apply a mask of thick makeup to her face each day in an effort to avoid teasing and humiliation. Susanne did this literally every day of her life for more than 50 years as she attended Seneca College in Toronto, got married, moved to the New York City suburbs and raised two children. Conditioned to believe that if the mask ever slipped — from careless application of her makeup or perhaps by shedding a tear — the world ... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=5096343 Wed, 03 Aug 2011 10:22:43 +0100 5096343 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=5086256&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F08%2F01%2Fare-you-living-vicariously-through-your-kids%2F In his book, The Available Parent: Radical Optimism for Raising Teens and Tweens, psychologist John Duffy, PsyD, talks about an adolescent client named John, who’s a star football player. He’s so good that the local paper predicts that he’ll play in Division I football, and college scouts have already started contacting him. A teenager’s dream, right? Well, unfortunately, John isn’t too keen on football. He plays the sport solely because it’s the only time his father, a famous college football player, pays attention to him.  And John pines for that attention and his dad’s approval. But he also wants to quit football and pursue other interests. Maybe you’ve felt a similar trap with your own parents: not enjoying or downright hating something you’re doing but sticking ... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=5086256 Mon, 01 Aug 2011 15:45:03 +0100 5086256 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=5086257&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F08%2F01%2Flove-suicide-and-well-being-international-positive-psychology-associations-second-congress%2F We live in a world that needs our help. – James Pawelski, Director of Education and Senior Scholar at the Positive Psychology Center, University of Pennsylvania, just before asking for a moment of silence for the victims of the terrorist act in Norway. From July 23rd through July 26th, the International Positive Psychology Association’s second congress took place in Philadelphia.  Two years ago, during a particularly miserable time in my life, my best friend, Professor Joel Morgovsky, suggested we go to the first congress together. I wasn’t in the mood. But I went, and I was sitting in talk after talk and workshop after workshop; mostly they were interesting, but please, when do we get to go home? Then I heard Barbara Fredrickson speak.  There are a few transformative lect... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=5086257 Mon, 01 Aug 2011 11:17:53 +0100 5086257 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=5069531&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F07%2F27%2Fthe-dangers-of-letting-your-online-persona-do-the-talking%2F Last week, while taking a break from work, I found myself reading through a friend’s personal blog. While everything was well written, and while the author herself did a careful job remaining anonymous to most of her readers, I couldn’t help but cringe at some of the stuff she was writing about. Personal stuff. Stuff that, once it’s out there, you just can’t take back. Part of my cringing was due to the fact that about a year ago, I was right there with her. I’ve had a personal blog for years, and it used to be the one place where I could completely dump my emotions. A creative writer who has to work (on non-creative writing) quite a lot to pay the bills, I don’t always get to spend the hours a day I’d like to on my own pieces — so whenever I... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=5069531 Wed, 27 Jul 2011 10:13:22 +0100 5069531 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=5036275&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F07%2F17%2F3-handy-ways-to-help-your-child-overcome-negative-thinking%2F Negative thinking isn’t something that just plagues adults. It also plagues kids. In the book Freeing Your Child From Negative Thinking: Powerful Practical Strategies to Build a Lifetime of Resilience, Flexibility and Happiness, child psychologist Tamar E. Chansky, Ph.D, writes that for kids with a “negative thinking bias,” negative thoughts become “the default, the first, last and final word.” Kids simply don’t realize that they have a choice in whether they internalize these thoughts. Instead, they start to see these inaccurate beliefs as absolute truths. Fortunately, Chansky says that parents can help! Whether your child expresses negative thoughts occasionally or on a regular basis, you can help them overcome these harmful patterns of thinking. Below are three activities to... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=5036275 Sun, 17 Jul 2011 10:17:59 +0100 5036275 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=5028459&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F07%2F11%2Fi-am-so-not-sorry-an-exercise-in-exposure-therapy%2F One form of cognitive behavioral therapy is exposure therapy, where your brain is supposed to form new connections and rewrite the language of your amygdala (fear center), so that it doesn’t associate every dog with the pit bull who took a bite out of your thigh in the fourth grade. By doing the exact thing that you most fear, you are, essentially, telling the old neurons in your brain to take a hike so that new ones, who don’t know anything about the pit bull, can now live inside your brain and tell you that everything is peachy. Yeah, well, that’s the theory. So you jump into a pit bull fight and say, “Here, doggie, doggie, you want a treat?” If he doesn’t take your leg off, you are good to go! If he does take your leg off, you have much more exposure therapy ahead of you&#82... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=5028459 Mon, 11 Jul 2011 15:35:27 +0100 5028459 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4975941&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F06%2F28%2Fmarsha-linehan-what-is-dialectical-behavioral-therapy-dbt%2F Last week the New York Times ran a fascinating piece on Marsha Linehan, Professor of Psychology at the University of Washington and the original developer of Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT), a modification of standard cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), but including elements of acceptance and mindfulness. Her work has been designed specifically for people who harm themselves, for those diagnosed with borderline personality (BPT), and those who suffer from pervasive suicidal thoughts and/or attempts. For the first time in her life, the mental health expert disclosed her own story (that we also discussed on the blog yesterday), which involved hospitalization at the age of 17 that lasted longer than two years. Benedict Carey, author of the interview with Linehan, writes: No one knows h... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4975941 Tue, 28 Jun 2011 14:45:03 +0100 4975941 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4968578&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F06%2F25%2Fwhen-your-workplace-is-toxic%2F If you find yourself in a toxic relationship, you always have the option of ditching the friend and moving on. However, when the environment in which you make your bread and butter damages your self-esteem and robs you of self-confidence, you can’t exactly walk out… if you want to eat that night. What to do? More than a few friends have complained to me recently about toxic workplaces and their dilemma of how to live sanely within insane walls. So I thought about this more, consulted some experts, and offer a few suggestions. 1. Keep the focus on you. Just like you learn in a 12-step groups for friends and families of alcoholics, the only person you can totally control is yourself, so it’s best to begin there. Theoretically, no one can make you feel a certain way unless you allo... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4968578 Sat, 25 Jun 2011 12:18:01 +0100 4968578 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4960121&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F06%2F22%2Fcultivating-self-compassion%2F When something has gone wrong, when there’s been a mistake made, no matter how small, many people are all too quick to point the finger — at themselves. They flog themselves for any failure, letting their self-esteem bend and bow at the face of disappointments and triumphs. For many, self-esteem is shaky at best. But there’s something you can build that’s more substantial than self-esteem. Something that doesn’t waver and can actually boost your well-being — and your performance isn’t a factor. According to psychologist Kristin Neff, Ph.D, in her book Self-Compassion: Stop Beating Yourself Up and Leave Insecurity Behind, that something is self-compassion. Being self-compassionate means that whether you win or lose, surpass your sky-high expectations or fall short, you sti... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4960121 Wed, 22 Jun 2011 15:12:04 +0100 4960121 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4952984&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F06%2F21%2Ftiki-barber-football-retirement-and-depression%2F As a reminder that depression strikes anyone, at any time, for any reason or no reason whatsoever, I give you Tiki Barber. For those of you unfamiliar with Mr. Barber, he was a professional (American) football player who decided to retire four years ago at age 32. A good time to retire as a football player, as your body starts to show its age against the physicality of the game. He took jobs as a sports commentator at NBC, both in their sports division and for “The Today Show.” But Mr. Barber’s depression appears to be directly related to a number of events that occurred in his life after his retirement. And now he says he wants to get back into the game, at age 36. His real problems appear to have started when it was revealed he was having an affair with a 23-year-old N... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4952984 Tue, 21 Jun 2011 15:37:49 +0100 4952984 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4952991&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F06%2F18%2Fhow-to-overcome-embarrassment%2F There’s a reason why we say we’re “dying of embarrassment” — because while we’re in the midst of an embarrassing episode, dying really does seems like the better option. No human being I know is immune from these moments; however, I seem to have a knack at collecting a large variety. After a recent incident that made me want to hide in a corner of the world without wi-fi, my writing and spiritual mentor gave me great advice. “It’s okay to be embarrassed,” he said. “It’s cleansing. This one has already passed, and passed nicely, like a kidney stone after the first day. You may relax.” Of course that didn’t stop me from feeling embarrassed some more. So after collecting some nuggets from friends and professionals, ... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4952991 Sat, 18 Jun 2011 12:14:50 +0100 4952991 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4934731&cid=t_165154_136_f&fid=36032&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.everydayhealth.com%2Fblog%2Flife-with-breast-cancer%2Fback-to-bra-shopping-to-fit-new-breasts%2F Now that my revised, reconstructed breasts are settling down, I once again need a new bra. I have learned through my transformation that shopping for a bra is a real task. The one black lace bra that worked in the past no longer fits my new breasts, and most of the bras I have tried on lately just don’t work either. It wasn’t until I had breast cancer that I learned how important a properly fitted bra is. First, I needed a good sturdy bra when I was using just a molded prosthesis for the first breast I lost. Then after the initial reconstruction surgery, I didn’t need as much support, but I needed a bra that would give me the shape I wanted. Now I need a new bra that has the right amount of coverage and can show off the cleavage without pushing my breasts together. What I really ne... Life with Breast Cancer blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4934731 Thu, 16 Jun 2011 16:39:16 +0100 4934731 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4921520&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F06%2F09%2Fthe-seed-9-pieces-of-advice-for-graduates%2F In his new book, The Seed: Finding Purpose and Happiness in Life and Work, international and Wall Street Journal bestselling author Jon Gordon tells the story of Josh, a guy who, like so many of us, has lost his passion at work. When Josh’s boss challenges the young worker to take two weeks off to assess his attitude and intentions, Josh heads to the country. There, a farmer hands him a seed and tells him that when he discovers the right place to plant the seed his purpose will be revealed to him. This tale takes readers on a quest to explore their own passion, purpose, and happiness in life and work. The themes presented are most appropriate for graduates just embarking on their path. Here, then, are nine such lessons presented in the story, in the words of Gordon: 1. Focus on Get to i... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4921520 Thu, 09 Jun 2011 15:45:54 +0100 4921520 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4902483&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F06%2F06%2Fthink-encouraging-girls-to-stay-smart-in-a-dumb-downed-world%2F In her gutsy book, Think: Straight Talk for Women to Stay Smart in a Dumbed-Down World, attorney and national television legal analyst Lisa Bloom paints a dire picture: The problem is not just about that 25 percent of young women who would rather be hot than smart; rather, it’s about a culture that actually makes that a rational choice: rewarding girls for looks over brains. And it’s about ALL of us, intelligent American females, ranging from girlhood to old age, who are dazzling ignorant about some critically important things. An aggravating thing happened in the last generation. As girls started seriously kicking ass at every level of education (girls now out-perform boys in elementary, middle, and high schools; we graduate from college, professional, and graduate schools in greater ... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4902483 Mon, 06 Jun 2011 15:23:52 +0100 4902483 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4893557&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F06%2F02%2Frun-like-a-girl-how-sports-can-empower-you%2F I never considered myself an athlete. My twin sister grew up with the reputation of being the tomboy of the family, the sporty one who participated in soccer and other organized sports. I was the brain and artsy one, who spent more time practicing my scales and arpeggios on our baby grand piano and perfecting pirouettes in the dance studio. I was intimidated by sports. And I found that I had absolutely no coordination once you threw a ball into the competition. So out were softball, volleyball, soccer, and pretty much every other sport. I swam during the summer and for my high school, and I started running in junior high, but just to lose enough weight to stop my period (I was a tad anorexic). I continued jogging and swimming through college into early adulthood. But just to stay in shape.... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4893557 Thu, 02 Jun 2011 16:37:03 +0100 4893557 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4872163&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F05%2F26%2Fdo-you-fall-into-the-trap-of-overthinking%2F I was looking up something in Professor Sonja Lyubomirsky’s excellent book, The How of Happiness, and I came across an interesting passage. (I’d marked it, so clearly I’d read it before, but I didn’t remember it well.) Many of us believe that when we feel down, we should try to focus inwardly and evaluate our feelings and our situation in order to attain self-insight and find solutions that might ultimately resolve our problems and relieve unhappiness. Susan Nolen-Hoeksema, I, and others have compiled a great deal of evidence challenging this assumption. Numerous studies over the past two decades have shown that to the contrary, overthinking ushers in a host of adverse consequences: It sustains or worsens sadness, fosters negatively biased thinking, impairs a person... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4872163 Thu, 26 May 2011 23:20:53 +0100 4872163 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4862631&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F05%2F24%2Fself-exploration-getting-to-know-thyself%2F Many of us go through life skimming the surface of our identities. That is, we don’t truly dig deeply into our thoughts, feelings, desires and dreams. Part of the problem is that we’re always on the go. When to-do lists keep swelling, self-exploration takes a backseat. How can it not, when we barely find time for self-care? Specifically, self-exploration involves “taking a look at your own thoughts, feelings, behaviors and motivations and asking why. It’s looking for the roots of who we are — answers to all the questions we have about [ourselves],” according to Ryan Howes, Ph.D, psychologist, writer and professor in Pasadena, California. Having a deeper understanding of ourselves has many benefits. It “helps people understand and accept who they are and why they d... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4862631 Tue, 24 May 2011 15:14:26 +0100 4862631 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4852941&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F05%2F22%2F5-ways-to-silence-your-inner-critic%2F A few years back, Health Journal columnist Melinda Beck penned an amazingly accurate and helpful article in the Wall Street Journal about the self-criticism that so often accompanies depression and anxiety. Not only was I delighted that she approached such a difficult and complicated aspect of our illness with compassion and insight, but I was ecstatic to see myself as one of the “experts” mentioned with suggestions on how to silent the annoying voice that says we are incapable, weak, and worthless. Depression and self-criticism, of course, are great companions. Beck writes: Unrelenting self-criticism often goes hand in hand with depression and anxiety, and it may even predict depression. In a study of 107 patients in the latest issue of Comprehensive Psychiatry, David M. Dunkl... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4852941 Sun, 22 May 2011 10:35:44 +0100 4852941 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4852943&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F05%2F21%2F6-steps-to-get-anyone-yourself-included-to-do-anything%2F I am not promising these things. A motivational coach, consultant, therapist, and award-winning faculty member at Yale School of Medicine is. A guy named Michael V. Pantalon. He has a bunch of credentials like publishing articles in the New England Journal of Medicine and the Journal of the American Medical Association, so I read though his book, Instant Influence: How to Get Anyone to Do Anything—FAST with curiosity. I have a lot of projects that I was hoping he could help me with. I have not had enough time to accurately test-drive his recipe of influence; however, I think I’m coming with a bit of a handicap considering my strong urge to want to please people. I only have to hear a vague “I don’t really see it that way,” to abandon my way and go with someone else’s. However,... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4852943 Sat, 21 May 2011 10:36:08 +0100 4852943 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4853261&cid=t_165154_180_f&fid=38612&url=http%3A%2F%2Ffeedproxy.google.com%2F%7Er%2Fpickthebrain%2FLYVv%2F%7E3%2FAyq3nvcFL_E%2F A couple of days ago I watched a fascinating You Tube clip about mantras. Mantras are the things you say to yourself in your head, over and over again – and they have the power to impact how you feel and act in the short term, which ultimately impacts how your life turns out in the long run. The clip I watched was presented by Gretchen Rubin of The Happiness Project, and you can view it over here (http://www.happiness-project.com/happiness_project/2011/05/re-evaluate-your-mantras.html). Gretchen spoke about some of the mantras affecting her life, and I could straight away relate. I think you might as well. For example, how often have you said to yourself something like the following? “I have no self-control” “I’m so busy, I don’t have time for that” “I’m so disorganized�... PickTheBrain | Motivation and Self Improvement blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4853261 Sat, 21 May 2011 05:27:23 +0100 4853261 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4848169&cid=t_165154_180_f&fid=38612&url=http%3A%2F%2Ffeedproxy.google.com%2F%7Er%2Fpickthebrain%2FLYVv%2F%7E3%2FAyq3nvcFL_E%2F A couple of days ago I watched a fascinating You Tube clip about mantras. Mantras are the things you say to yourself in your head, over and over again – and they have the power to impact how you feel and act in the short term, which ultimately impacts how your life turns out in the long run. The clip I watched was presented by Gretchen Rubin of The Happiness Project, and you can view it over here (http://www.happiness-project.com/happiness_project/2011/05/re-evaluate-your-mantras.html). Gretchen spoke about some of the mantras affecting her life, and I could straight away relate. I think you might as well. For example, how often have you said to yourself something like the following? “I have no self-control” “I’m so busy, I don’t have time for that” “I’m so disorganized�... PickTheBrain | Motivation and Self Improvement blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4848169 Sat, 21 May 2011 05:27:23 +0100 4848169 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4841593&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34859&url=http%3A%2F%2Fblog.davemsw.com%2Farchives%2F2011%2F05%2Fon_being_wrong.php Arguments over who's right may be the most common topic of disagreement anywhere and by anybody. Check out the insights Kathryn Schulz, in her book, Being Wrong, has to offer. Ms Schulz makes a compelling argument that being wrong is more valuable than being right. In fact, if one is too preoccupied with being right, they will miss lots of mistakes due to the amazing human tendency to see whatever they want to see. Think about it. A large proportion of learning comes from one of two situations. You either make your own mistakes and learn from them, or you read about someone else's mistakes in a book. But what you do from there is critical. Many people first punish themselves for their mistakes. This is what I call "shame". There is all sort of research out there that documents that... Ψ Dare To Dream... blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4841593 Wed, 18 May 2011 01:05:24 +0100 4841593 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4829216&cid=t_165154_136_f&fid=36032&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.everydayhealth.com%2Fblog%2Flife-with-breast-cancer%2Fjudge-rules-that-mom-with-breast-cancer-cant-parent%2F I have been following the story of Alaina Giordano, the North Carolina woman whose two children (ages 5 and 11) have been removed from her care and placed in the custody of their father because she has stage 4 breast cancer. It doesn’t matter that Giordano’s cancer is under control; it doesn’t seem to concern Judge Nancy Gordon that the children’s father lives in Chicago and that she is relocating the children far from their home. It only matters that this judge feels they will do better by being with the non-ill parent. Is Judge Gordon surmising that women with breast cancer can no longer parent? Since when did breast cancer take away our ability to be a loving, caring, and responsible parent? I wanted to write about this when I first heard about it from my editor last week.... Life with Breast Cancer blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4829216 Mon, 16 May 2011 18:18:14 +0100 4829216 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4820923&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F05%2F12%2Fthe-stupid-complex%2F Nowhere in the DSM-IV does it mention “the stupid complex,” but I’m telling you it’s an epidemic these days. I used to suffer in silence. But ever since I’ve come out of the closet, I swear I find a fellow sufferer every day. At my last therapy session, I was telling her how scared I was that everyone was going to find out that I was inherently stupid. She laughed out loud and said, “Do you know how many times I hear that a day?” Oh. Good. Then it’s not just me. I don’t know when it started. It could be a result of being a twin, and needing to form a sense of identity separate from my sister. Since she stole “tomboy” early on, I became “the brain,” except that mine didn’t work, but no one really knew that but me. And I was able to keep it a secret all throug... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4820923 Thu, 12 May 2011 15:35:01 +0100 4820923 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4813614&cid=t_165154_136_f&fid=36032&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.everydayhealth.com%2Fblog%2Flife-with-breast-cancer%2Fdo-we-need-a-longer-hospital-stay-after-a-mastectomy%2F Even though the scientific evidence shows that women recover just as well at home after a mastectomy, I don’t believe women should be sent home the day after surgery. In the late 1990s, the switch was made to sending women home quickly after surgery to remove a breast. The evidence suggested that women recover just as well at home as in the hospital. Prior to that decision, many women were in the hospital for several days — now it is up to doctors whether to keep a woman longer than the initial day of recovery. They need a medical reason for insurance to pay for the extended hospital stay. But the evidence doesn’t address the emotional impact that breast cancer and losing a breast has on a woman. We especially need time to assess our feelings about losing a breast before returni... Life with Breast Cancer blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4813614 Tue, 10 May 2011 17:00:14 +0100 4813614 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4829164&cid=t_165154_131_f&fid=34989&url=http%3A%2F%2Ffeeds.b5media.com%2F%7Er%2Fb5media%2FGeneticsHealth%2F%7E3%2FplF9O_o_GRw%2F I probably shouldn’t ever do online tests that claim to be reliable indicators of my health or personality, but that doesn’t stop me from frittering away my time every once in awhile. Who doesn’t want to know how their IQ stacks up with their friend’s, whether their personality type is compatible with their partner’s, or if they could be considered a “fitness junkie”?  I know I do. So when Alternative Depression Therapy’s online bi-polar test showed up in my Twitter stream, I was too curious not to see my results. I’ve never been diagnosed with any mental illness, but hey, this could save me the trip to the psychologist, and an excuse to get my hands on some good pills! (Kidding, of course.) But all the test really taught me is that I&... Genetics and Health blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4829164 Mon, 09 May 2011 20:18:32 +0100 4829164 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4803387&cid=t_165154_131_f&fid=34989&url=http%3A%2F%2Ffeeds.b5media.com%2F%7Er%2Fb5media%2FGeneticsHealth%2F%7E3%2FplF9O_o_GRw%2F I probably shouldn’t ever do online tests that claim to be reliable indicators of my health or personality, but that doesn’t stop me from frittering away my time every once in awhile. Who doesn’t want to know how their IQ stacks up with their friend’s, whether their personality type is compatible with their partner’s, or if they could be considered a “fitness junkie”?  I know I do. So when Alternative Depression Therapy’s online bi-polar test showed up in my Twitter stream, I was too curious not to see my results. I’ve never been diagnosed with any mental illness, but hey, this could save me the trip to the psychologist, and an excuse to get my hands on some good pills! (Kidding, of course.) But all the test really taught me is that I&... Genetics and Health blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4803387 Mon, 09 May 2011 20:18:32 +0100 4803387 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4758787&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F04%2F27%2F8-reasons-why-waiting-in-line-drives-us-crazy%2F I’m a very impatient person, and standing in a slow-moving line is one of those very small, maddening aspects of life that drives me crazy. As often happens, however, when I learned more about the experience, it became more interesting to me. I happened to read a paper by David Maister, The Psychology of Waiting Lines. The piece is aimed at people who operate stores, restaurants, doctors’ offices, and other places where people fuss about being kept waiting. Of course, most of us are the ones standing in line, not the ones controlling the line, but I was fascinated by getting this insight into my own psychology. Maister’s main point is that the actual time we’re waiting may have little relationship to how long that wait feels. Two minutes can pass in a flash, or two ... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4758787 Wed, 27 Apr 2011 12:49:52 +0100 4758787 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4753991&cid=t_165154_180_f&fid=38612&url=http%3A%2F%2Ffeedproxy.google.com%2F%7Er%2Fpickthebrain%2FLYVv%2F%7E3%2F09fipszrXcY%2F Mike had become a wealthy entrepreneur, but he had a hard time enjoying his business success because it seemed that every minute he wasn’t solving a business problem he was worried about what others thought of him and what he could do to get their approval. Janet probably had as many good ideas as Mike, but because she was plagued with procrastination, she was nowhere near as successful. Roger always talked about his dream of doing something on his own, but he just didn’t have the confidence to leave his safe (and boring) job. And finally there was Marlene, who complained of bouts of anxiety that seemed to come over her without warning and paralyze her. Stories like these from our clients go on forever. We’ve literally heard thousands of them. It seems as if no one really escapes. Es... PickTheBrain | Motivation and Self Improvement blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4753991 Tue, 26 Apr 2011 04:21:56 +0100 4753991 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4747656&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34958&url=http%3A%2F%2Ffeeds.counsellingresource.com%2F%7Er%2Fpsychology-philosophy%2F%7E3%2FZ7m6JXYKwqo%2F Just as healing physical whiplash requires avoiding activities that might inflame the affected tissues, getting over an encounter with a manipulator requires avoiding self-reproach and learning to ascribe responsibility where it truly belongs.Tags: character disturbance, relationships, self-esteem (Source: Psychology, Philosophy and Real Life) Psychology, Philosophy and Real Life blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4747656 Mon, 25 Apr 2011 15:01:13 +0100 4747656 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4747649&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F04%2F25%2F10-tips-for-healthy-living%2F Health psychologists have a dual mission: to help prevent mental and physical illness and disease and to promote healthy living. From cancer to diabetes, health psychologists deal with a wide variety of issues underlying physical illness and chronic disease. According to Maureen Lyon, Ph.D, clinical health psychologist and associate research professor in pediatrics at George Washington University, health psychologists use their knowledge to “enhance the quality of life of individuals.” Interestingly, much of what health psychologists teach (deep breathing, mindfulness, stress reduction, etc.) works for everyone. Our fast-paced life and increased dependency on technology often results in disconnection, stress and lack of sleep, which all wreak havoc on our health. Fortunately, there are... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4747649 Mon, 25 Apr 2011 11:30:19 +0100 4747649 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4734204&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F04%2F21%2Fi-am-the-most-important-person-you-know%2F I am not a narcissist, but I am the most important person you know. When I’m talking to you. When you read an essay or article of mine. When you’re in a meeting with me. When you’re sharing a meal or a drink with me. In olden days — like 10 years ago — we would call this “attention.” We would say, “Oh, look, you’re paying attention to what I’m writing” or “It’s nice of you to pay attention when I’m talking.” And yes, I know how important your social network is to your fragile ego, your delicate self-esteem. That you need to understand and be reassured that nothing more important is going on in your world. That you’re not going to dump me in mid-conversation for a potentially better conversation ... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4734204 Thu, 21 Apr 2011 15:39:20 +0100 4734204 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4734433&cid=t_165154_131_f&fid=34989&url=http%3A%2F%2Ffeeds.b5media.com%2F%7Er%2Fb5media%2FGeneticsHealth%2F%7E3%2FfyrcNn_z3M0%2F Nick Vujicic was born with no arms and no legs, and struggled through his formative years with self esteem. Realizing that his condition could inspire others, he started a non-profit organization called Life Without Limbs when he was 17, and even wrote a book with the same name. He was nominated in 2005 for the Young Australian of the Year Award, and is now a motivational speaker touring schools around the globe. He explains how hard someone may think they have it, but when they take a look at him, it seems to put everything in perspective. Vujicic’s main goal is for people to realize how important and precious they are, and to never think they’re less than worthy. On top of that, he has a wicked funny-bone. Watch Vujicic’s story and inspirational message below, and I def... Genetics and Health blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4734433 Wed, 20 Apr 2011 17:58:55 +0100 4734433 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4734208&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F04%2F19%2Fwant-a-happier-marriage-unrealistically-idealize-your-partner%2F If ignorance is bliss, then delusion is even better — if you’re in a new marriage, anyways. So says new research from investigators at the University at Buffalo, who examined 193 newly-married couples over three years to see what kinds of variables might predict greater marital satisfaction. How could this be? Weren’t we always told the common wisdom — that we needed to be realistic in our relationships, and not look for that Knight in Shining Armor who comes to our rescue (or a Maiden trapped in a castle tower who needs rescuing)? Apparently the common wisdom may need to be revisited, because continuing to idealize your partner long after the glow of the wedding fades away seems to help keep you happy. Read on to learn more… This isn’t the first resear... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4734208 Tue, 19 Apr 2011 17:59:56 +0100 4734208 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4714943&cid=t_165154_131_f&fid=34989&url=http%3A%2F%2Ffeeds.b5media.com%2F%7Er%2Fb5media%2FGeneticsHealth%2F%7E3%2F51nKDAnpxeg%2F In today’s slightly ironic mental health news, scientists at the University of New Brunswick just discovered that self-help mantras can lower self-esteem instead of elevating it. But before you write off all self-help books and the power of positive thinking, hear out the nuances of the study: Psychologists found that if you have reasonably good self-esteem, then repeating statements like “I’m a lovable person” can leave you feeling better, but if you’re feeling particularly low, then a saccharin quotes and self-help books could just leave you feeling lower. The positive take-away? It’s okay to bitch, every once in awhile. You don’t have to go as far as self-help books to run into people who will tell you that you should just “think positive&... Genetics and Health blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4714943 Thu, 14 Apr 2011 19:40:40 +0100 4714943 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4709249&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F04%2F13%2F6-reasons-why-its-good-to-be-a-loser%2F It was impossible to miss the white sign that hung over the wall of Saint Mary’s high school lacrosse field yesterday. The thing was as tall as our two-story house with letters as big as construction cranes. With just one word: “Prom?” On the hill behind it stood an adorable high-school junior with red roses. It would have been a perfect scene right out of a Jennifer Aniston movie… had she said yes. Ouch. So the poor guy packed up the humongous sign and his roses, and walked to his car with his chin buried in his chest. I wish I could have run up to him and said, “This experience will make you stronger in the long run … trust me.” Because that’s not just a shallow attempt at consolation. It’s absolutely true. John Grohol wrote a great piece the other day, “Be th... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4709249 Wed, 13 Apr 2011 12:54:20 +0100 4709249 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4704714&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F04%2F12%2F6-things-every-kid-should-know-about-a-parents-depression%2F Depression never happens in a vacuum. Like a ripple in the water, a parent’s illness can’t help but affect her offspring. Different studies have documented how depression in a new mother clearly affects her interactions with her baby or toddler. Depressed mothers are more withdrawn, less responsive to their infant’s signals. “Their facial expressions and displays of emotion [are] more muted or flat, and their voices [are] monotone,” explains Ruta Nonacs in “A Deeper Shade of Blue.” “They [remain] disengaged and [do] little to support their child’s activities or exploration of the environment.” A mother’s depression also affects grade-schoolers and adolescents. When parents fail to meet the needs of the people under their care, some kids begin to act out, have ... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4704714 Tue, 12 Apr 2011 15:05:43 +0100 4704714 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4696685&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F04%2F10%2Fgetting-the-love-you-want-over-and-over-again%2F In his New York Times bestseller, Getting the Love Your Want, psychologist Harville Hendrix explains why people who grew up in homes — well, a little like the one in the 2006 flick Little Miss Sunshine — without proper emotional nurturing seek dysfunctional relationships as adults. He explains the low brain — our more reptilian thought process that can’t handle anything different than what it already knows and reverts to fear as its primary gear — and the new brain, the cerebral cortex that is conscious, alert, able to reason and think logically. He writes: What we are doing, I have discovered from years of theoretical research and clinical observation, is looking for someone who has the predominant character traits of the people who raised us. Our old brain, trapped in t... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4696685 Sun, 10 Apr 2011 18:05:02 +0100 4696685 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4696688&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F04%2F09%2Fconcealed-sexual-orientation-is-like-an-abscess%2F I once had an abscessed tooth, and in the absence of a dentist, I considered pulling it myself to end the intense pain. Secrets are like abscesses. They hurt when we touch them but we can’t stop touching them. When a secret is at the center of our integrity it produces excruciating pain. We long for the momentary intense pain that comes with releasing the pressure. Each of us seeks to maintain a sense of internal integrity, while still making a positive impression on others. We are driven by a fear of being discredited. Sometimes that means keeping secrets, especially when the concealed information is sensitive. Concealment of sexual orientation requires considerable effort, constant vigilance, and behavioral self-editing. Although there is a wish to disclose the secret, the need to make... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4696688 Sat, 09 Apr 2011 17:05:08 +0100 4696688 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4684433&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F04%2F05%2Fare-facebook-friends-real-friends%2F I don’t think I realized just how insecure I was until I joined Facebook two years ago. I thought the 12 or so years of therapy would have resulted in a more evolved woman. But here’s the truth: every time I lose a friend on Facebook I take it personally. Yes, that is ridiculous. I know. But I still feel the blow. I try not to remember the number of friends I have when I go to bed at night, but somehow it sticks—unlike every phone number I’ve tried to memorize. So, upon logging on to Facebook every morning, I immediately notice that I lost two friends overnight. While I was sleeping! What especially irks me is when I lose three friends right after I post something. Now I know that it probably has nothing to do with the content of my post, but it’s the same punch in the gut that I... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4684433 Tue, 05 Apr 2011 15:00:08 +0100 4684433 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4670170&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F04%2F02%2Fdo-you-feel-like-a-fake-2%2F When I was in grad school, I was a fake, a phony, a fraud. Or at least I felt that way — very much. I felt like the program made some exception to accept me, that I really didn’t deserve to be there, that I wore my stupidity on my sleeve and that soon the professors and powers-that-be would find out and kick me out. That never happened. (I actually left after receiving my Master’s to pursue writing.) But it didn’t quell my fears. Even when I received high grades and positive feedback and praise, I still felt a gnawing discomfort that I just didn’t belong in such a smart place. I also wasn’t the only one. My cohort and I talked regularly about feeling like our department had a made a mistake in admitting us. We worried about keeping up, regularly questioned our i... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4670170 Sat, 02 Apr 2011 19:20:51 +0100 4670170 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4615189&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F03%2F19%2Fcompulsive-hoarding-and-6-tips-to-help%2F It’s been awhile since I covered the topic of compulsive hoarding, because the last time I did I posted photos of my nut collection and book pile, and the next thing I know I was contacted by Discovery Disney to be fixed on some hoarding special show. Seems like that’s kind of a pattern, now that I think about it. I go public with my stuff … I get invited onto shows! Well, anyway, I was reading an article in the Fall 2007 issue of The Johns Hopkins Depression & Anxiety Bulletin — an interview with Gerald Nestadt, M.D., M.P.H, Director of the Johns Hopkins Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder Clinic and Jack Samuels, Ph.D., an assistant professor with a joint appointment in the Department of Psychiatry and Behavioral Sciences at the Johns Hopkins University School of Me... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4615189 Sat, 19 Mar 2011 18:30:05 +0100 4615189 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4636502&cid=t_165154_112_f&fid=34971&url=http%3A%2F%2Fblog.drmalpani.com%2F2011%2F03%2Fwhy-i-admire-women-with-vaginismus-who.html Vaginismus is a surprisingly common sexual disorder which causes a lot of distress and low self esteem. Women with vaginismus feel inadequate and incompetent; and they cannot share their diagnosis or problem with anyone. They feel like freaks - and feel guilty that they cannot give their husband sexual pleasure.Not only does this put a lot of stress on the marriage, the desire to have a baby can often be the last straw which breaks the camel's back ! While the urge to complete the family maybe very strong, they are petrified about the fact that they may need to seek medical attention to achieve this goal. For a woman with vaginismus, even the idea of going to a doctor can cause sleepless nights.The fact that many gynecologists are clueless about this condition can just end up making a bad ... The Patient's Doctor blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4636502 Sat, 19 Mar 2011 05:04:00 +0100 4636502 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4610847&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F03%2F18%2Fmancession-and-male-depression-open-your-minds-and-shut-your-mouths%2F I used to think a woman’s depression rate was two or three times that of a man’s simply because of the hormonal roller coaster she gets to ride from the time she first gets her period in junior high (or now in first grade — okay, maybe not that early) until she can stop buying sanitary items or, even better, stop making her husband buy them for her. But now I’m not so sure. Women are giving more weight these days to domestic tasks like raising kids and keeping the house in order than to their menstrual cycle and the biological trauma of childbirth. Because, in sync with Dr. Boadie Dunlap’s editorial in the British Journal of Psychiatry, as we switched roles in our home, the adjustment has been much more difficult than the simple plan we forecast in Quicken: my income increase... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4610847 Fri, 18 Mar 2011 18:16:34 +0100 4610847 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4517206&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F02%2F24%2Feating-disorders-awareness-week-how-parents-can-help%2F This week is National Eating Disorders Awareness Week, which is sponsored by the National Eating Disorders Association (NEDA). Like I said in my post on Weightless, I believe that awareness means spreading accurate information about eating disorders. One of the biggest misconceptions is that parents cause eating disorders. They don’t! In fact, many complex factors are involved in predisposing a person to an eating disorder. According to eating disorder specialist Sarah Ravin, Ph.D: “…the development of an eating disorder is influenced very heavily by genetics, neurobiology, individual personality traits, and co-morbid disorders. Environment clearly plays a role in the development of eating disorders, but environment alone is not sufficient to cause them.” (Check out her blog post f... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4517206 Thu, 24 Feb 2011 11:04:30 +0100 4517206 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4495248&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F02%2F18%2F10-tips-to-mend-a-broken-heart%2F Bess Myerson once wrote that “to fall in love is awfully simple, but to fall out of love is simply awful.” Especially if you are the one who wanted the relationship to last. Mending a broken heart is never easy. There is no quick way to stop your heart from hurting so much. To stop loving isn’t an option. Author Henri Nouwen writes, “When those you love deeply reject you, leave you, or die, your heart will be broken. But that should not hold you back from loving deeply. The pain that comes from deep love makes your love ever more fruitful.” But how do we get beyond the pain? Here are 10 tips I’ve gathered from experts and from conversations with friends on how they patched up their heart and tried, ever so gradually, to move on. 1. Go through it, not ... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4495248 Fri, 18 Feb 2011 20:56:05 +0100 4495248 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4482826&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F02%2F15%2Fpunishment-a-cultural-phenomenon%2F We are a culture that believes in punishment. Not just for the criminal or the misbehaving child, but in almost every interaction we have, from our intimate partners to our global enemies and friends. We don’t just see punishment as a deterrent. We think punishment works to change another’s behavior. Just look around. Take a closer look at how you approach a difficult conversation. We all do it. We use punishment all of the time. We don’t even think about it. Punishment is a completely ineffective way to change anyone’s behavior. Punishment simply breeds punishment-avoidance — and what we resist persists. In spite of ongoing and frequent evidence to the contrary, Americans rely on punishment to effect positive change in all areas of our lives. From our child-rearing prac... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4482826 Tue, 15 Feb 2011 18:31:57 +0100 4482826 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4489985&cid=t_165154_151_f&fid=35818&url=http%3A%2F%2Ffeedproxy.google.com%2F%7Er%2FRecoveryIsSexycom%2F%7E3%2FEsEBu0zngAk%2F These symptoms and characteristics of the thoughts and actions of a codependent are offered as a tool to aid in self-evaluation.Denial Symptoms: I have difficulty identifying what I am feeling.I minimize, alter or deny how I truly feel.I perceive myself as completely unselfish and dedicated to the well being of others.Low Self Esteem Symptoms: I have difficulty making decisions.I judge everything I think, say or do harshly, as never “good enough.”I am embarrassed to receive recognition and praise or gifts.I do not ask others to meet my needs or desires.I value others approval of my thinking, feelings and behavior over my own.I do not perceive myself as a lovable or worthwhile person.Compliance Symptoms: I compromise my own values and integrity to avoid rejection or others anger... Recovery Is Sexy.com blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4489985 Tue, 15 Feb 2011 15:17:02 +0100 4489985 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4455490&cid=t_165154_151_f&fid=35818&url=http%3A%2F%2Frecoveryissexy.com%2Fself-esteem-myths%2F This article and the book may help debunk some of the myths of self-esteem and aid recovery.Self esteem is a woman’s issue;Self esteem is the same as confidence;Self esteem is the end goal;Self esteem comes from something outside of yourself, e.g., right man (or woman), lots of money, living in the right neighborhood, our parents;We are born with self esteem;Self esteem is all about how we look.The truth is self esteem is NOT the same as confidence, we are NOT born with it, we CAN’T get it from our mothers or husbands or jobs, men and women BOTH suffer from this malady, it’s not the destination—it’s the journey.The most compelling and truthful statement about self esteem is what I have discovered from years of hard knocks and even more years of hard work is that self esteem comes... Recovery Is Sexy.com blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4455490 Wed, 09 Feb 2011 14:14:28 +0100 4455490 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4419455&cid=t_165154_151_f&fid=35818&url=http%3A%2F%2Frecoveryissexy.com%2Fmens-low-sex-drive%2F This article may help affected men in recovery identify and seek help.The male libido is always in overdrive, right? Wrong — one out of five men actually have a low sex drive.Men. High sex drive. Panting sexual animals. We know what they want. And we know when they want it: right now.Even doctors tend to see men as "sexual automatons," hardwired always to want sex, says pioneering sex researcher Irwin Goldstein, "But that is not the case at all," Goldstein tells WebMD Magazine. "Many, many men — about one in five –have such low sexual desire they’d rather do almost anything else than have sex."One in five men doesn’t want sex? How can that be true? And why haven’t we heard about it? Actually, many women have — the ones hea... Recovery Is Sexy.com blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4419455 Mon, 31 Jan 2011 13:55:36 +0100 4419455 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4414548&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F01%2F30%2F5-steps-to-a-more-resilient-you%2F Resiliency is what makes some people able to bounce back after a particularly traumatic or difficult time or stressor in one’s life, while others fall apart. It is a component of positive psychology, in that researchers try and figure out what makes resilient people different than others. And then seeks to help others learn some simple skills that may be able to help build resiliency in one’s own life. There are no secret short-cuts to building greater resilience in your life. Most skills you can learn to help build resiliency are things that are going to take lots of time and lots of practice. Practice is one of the things people often forget when it comes to changing one’s behavior or one’s life. You didn’t become this way overnight. It took years — a... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4414548 Sun, 30 Jan 2011 11:40:39 +0100 4414548 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4386298&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34706&url=http%3A%2F%2Fdrdeborahserani.blogspot.com%2F2011%2F01%2Fjanuary-25th-thank-your-mentor-day.html There are few relationships in life more influential than one between a mentor and a young person. Sometimes these people breeze in and out of your life without much fanfare, but you know they've transformed you. Others take on the mentor role in a more obvious way, actively supporting and guiding you. The Harvard Mentoring Project is joining with National Mentoring Month to mark January 25th as Thank Your Mentor Day™. I like this campaign because it highlights the positive aspects of relationships and the importance of looking out for others.I've had a lot of traumatic things happen in my life - but I've also been lucky to have several people mentor me along the way. Mary O'Connor: As a little girl, my next door neighbor showed me the importance of poise and self-care. This southern wom... Dr. Deborah Serani blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4386298 Sat, 22 Jan 2011 15:07:00 +0100 4386298 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4377613&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F01%2F20%2Fwhy-ruminating-is-unhealthy-and-how-to-stop%2F Ruminating is like a record that’s stuck and keeps repeating the same lyrics. It’s replaying an argument with a friend in your mind. It’s retracing past mistakes. When people ruminate, they over-think or obsess about situations or life events, such as work or relationships. Research has shown that rumination is associated with a variety of negative consequences, including depression, anxiety, post-traumatic stress disorder, binge-drinking and binge-eating. Why does rumination lead to such harmful results? For some people, drinking or binge-eating becomes a way to cope with life and drown out their ruminations, according to Susan Nolen-Hoeksema, Ph.D, a psychologist and professor at Yale University. Not surprisingly, ruminating conjures up more negative thoughts. It becomes a cycle. ... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4377613 Thu, 20 Jan 2011 12:06:31 +0100 4377613 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4318372&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F01%2F06%2Fsustainable-marriages-satisfied-individuals%2F Want a sustainable marriage? Some emerging research suggests that the satisfaction of each individual in the relationship may be just as important as other, more traditional factors such as communication skills and how a couple argues. More and more, researchers are finding that happy marriages may be based in how much the relationship supports each individual in their own learning and self-growth. After all, a stagnant relationship isn’t exactly fertile ground for happiness. When we grow individually in a marriage, we also grow as a couple. This effect isn’t done in solitude — it occurs when your partner helps open your eyes to new experiences and learn new things. That’s why trying something you’ve never done before on a date is exciting! It expands your hor... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4318372 Thu, 06 Jan 2011 13:10:33 +0100 4318372 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4309667&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2011%2F01%2F04%2Faccessing-your-authentic-self%2F “Congruent is one of my favorite words. The word congruent describes someone who is the same on the outside as they are on the inside,” writes psychotherapist Angela Caughlin in her book, Journaling Through: Unleashing the Power of the Authentic Self: Seven Benefits of Unlocking the Wisdom Within. But, as so many of us know, being congruent is far from easy. It means not caring what others think about you. If you’re a chronic people-pleaser (Hi, my name is Margarita), this might as well be like walking a tightrope. (Yes, it’s that dramatic.) It also means knowing who you are. Sometimes, the simple question of “what do I like” is hard to answer, especially if we’ve spent years deferring to someone else and looking for validation from others. Maybe you knew who you were for... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4309667 Tue, 04 Jan 2011 16:58:12 +0100 4309667 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4305109&cid=t_165154_151_f&fid=35818&url=http%3A%2F%2Frecoveryissexy.com%2Fbeing-of-freedom%2F Image via WikipediaBeing of Freedom We do not regret the past, nor wish to shut the door on it.  We comprehend the word serenity and we know peace.  We live a life of balance by taming the many voices within so that they may serve their individual purpose without taking over and destroying the perfect harmony of our being. We give up the mastermind of our own self-will to follow the light of our spirit and live a humbled existence.  We know the gift of life comes from deep within by experiencing the gratitude of this very moment.  We accept that Thy will leads us to true freedom.Being of Freedom « The Hazelden Blog.Related articlesHeart of Serenity (recoveryissexy.com)Two Wolves (recoveryissexy.com)Disturbing Denial (recoveryissexy.com) Share, print or e-mail this articleStepping Ston... Recovery Is Sexy.com blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4305109 Mon, 03 Jan 2011 10:07:13 +0100 4305109 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4294710&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F12%2F27%2Faccepting-imperfection%2F Professional organizer Debbie Jordan Kravitz was a perfectionist through and through. “I’ve struggled with perfectionism all my life. Between having parents with perfectionistic tendencies and my own people-pleasing and competitive nature, it’s been a part of me for as long as I can remember,” she said. As a wife and mom of two young kids, her perfectionism seeped into everything, no matter how big or small. She dwelled on her flaws and failures — defined essentially as “anything less than perfect.” But as any perfectionist truly knows, perfectionism is unreachable. It sabotages your self-image, squashes your satisfaction and turns life into a series of disappointments. In the book The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Wh... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4294710 Mon, 27 Dec 2010 14:36:23 +0100 4294710 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4272359&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F12%2F20%2Fsavoring-2010%2F Resolutions — figuring out how to improve and move on — are fine. But resolutions snap us into the mindset of getting on with our lives, thinking about how we’d like to be, and glancing forward toward happiness. But there are new words in town. The positive psychology movement is all about savoring and flourishing. We know that negative thoughts seem to be stronger than positive thoughts and the tipping point in building up a critical mass for positivity is about 3 to 1 in favor of more positive thoughts. At that point there is a shift in our brain and perception toward looking for, and savoring, positive thoughts and experiences. When we do this we flourish. Savoring allows us to linger on the too-short-lived positive experiences that we have. The future always seems to be... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4272359 Mon, 20 Dec 2010 11:20:59 +0100 4272359 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4265848&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34706&url=http%3A%2F%2Fdrdeborahserani.blogspot.com%2F2010%2F12%2Fart-that-empower-girls.html Did you know that studies investigating gender roles say that despite recent changes in media, rigid stereotyping for young girls still exists. It's true.Advertising, cartoons, commercials, picture books and toys are just some of the ways that children develop an understanding about how society defines what is means to be a girl or a boy. Most often, girls are represented as being motivated by love and romance, and are less independent than boys. Experts in the the field confirm that many themes portray girls as sexual yet powerless and passive. What confusing messages!When looking at the posters above, girls (and boys) can learn that gender roles are not rigid. The artist, Amanda Visell has had her work featured in galleries, museums, toys stores and even movies around the world. I think ... Dr. Deborah Serani blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4265848 Sat, 18 Dec 2010 16:13:00 +0100 4265848 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4172112&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F11%2F16%2Fdoes-your-personality-shine-through%2F From time to time we all wonder what other people think of us. Often in a quiet moment, just before going to sleep, while reviewing the day, we try to work out how friends and family might interpret what we’ve said and done. How neurotic does my partner think I am? Do my colleagues think of me as a reliable, hard worker? Do my friends think I’m stuck in a rut or open to new experiences? Here on the inside we have a model of ourselves that makes sense, but out there, what conclusions are those who know us best drawing about our personalities? Of course we all differ and you might imagine that the differences between actor and observer would cancel out. For example some people might appear more conscientious than they are, and others less so. How Do Your Friends See You? When ps... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4172112 Tue, 16 Nov 2010 16:35:25 +0100 4172112 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4125064&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F11%2F01%2Fbad-mommy-the-baby-blues-and-postpartum-depression%2F Eighteen years ago, when I gave birth to my son, I was a wreck; depressed and racked with guilt over it. I learned later I wasn’t alone. Many mothers felt the same way when their kids were born, only they kept it quiet. Today, thank God, the silence is broken and women can admit just how imperfect their mommy-ness feels at times. Back in the old days, however, it was odd for a woman to confess that she didn’t feel a strong traditional pull to be a mother. We’re talking way back — before cell phones, before the Internet, before Facebook, even before reality television shows! For my husband and me, circumstances beyond our control forced us to consider life without children. Having the choice taken away from us because of my chronic illness was depressing and we had to wo... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4125064 Mon, 01 Nov 2010 16:56:02 +0100 4125064 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4119123&cid=t_165154_111_f&fid=36048&url=http%3A%2F%2Ffeeds.b5media.com%2F%7Er%2Fb5media%2FAHeartyLife%2F%7E3%2Fc8vHLB_EYg4%2F photo: Thinkstock A tad self-involved, are we? New research shows that the average woman spends the equivalent of five days gazing at her own reflection in a mirror. How much time do you spend staring at yourself? It usually feels like we leave the house after about 30 seconds of glancing in the mirror to make sure we don’t have any sleep in our eyes, but we’ll admit that sometimes we primp longer than necessary. Five days is a long time, though — we could be doing other things that are a lot more fun (and productive) than staring into the mirror. Here are five things we’d rather be doing for five days of the year: 1. Go on vacation. We’ll take a mirror-less, five-day vacation, preferably in a tropical paradise. 2. Start to learn an instrument. We know that five d... A Hearty Life blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4119123 Thu, 28 Oct 2010 15:28:34 +0100 4119123 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4105631&cid=t_165154_87_f&fid=34872&url=http%3A%2F%2Fblisstree.com%2Ffeel%2Ffemale-friendship-are-the-pitfalls-worth-the-perks%2F photo: Thinkstock We’ve never been crazy about sororities. Not that we have anything against matching sweatshirts or tailgating, we just know from experience that when you get 50 teenage girls together in one place, there are going to be some tears. Kelly Valen, author of The Twisted Sisterhood, probably wishes that she knew that before she pledged a sorority. She was betrayed and humiliated by her sorority sisters, leaving her with trust issues when it came to female friends. She did a survey of 3,000 women from around the U.S., and she found that she wasn’t alone in her not-so-sisterly feelings of discomfort with women. We’ve all got a story or two about how a close woman friend hung us out to dry. We can’t help but guess what leads to these situations: Competitiv... Healthbolt blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4105631 Mon, 25 Oct 2010 16:46:48 +0100 4105631 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4098515&cid=t_165154_180_f&fid=38612&url=http%3A%2F%2Ffeedproxy.google.com%2F%7Er%2Fpickthebrain%2FLYVv%2F%7E3%2FFXDS_KqVdiQ%2F Self-esteem is the way you judge and look at yourself.  Some people believe that their appearance will enhance their level of self-esteem, but in reality, having high self-esteem comes from the ability to see yourself special and unique all the time. Do you see yourself as special and unique?  Do you have high self-esteem?  Do you love yourself? No? Here is a quick 5-point guide to build self esteem when you forget how great you are: 1.  Believe in your inner beauty Don’t say to yourself that you are not beautiful nor unique.  Know that every person is unique and true gift to the world.  There is no one on earth like you and you have a lot to offer to humanity. 2.  Believe in your mind power Know that the way you see yourself comes from the power of your thoughts and mind.  U... PickTheBrain | Motivation and Self Improvement blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4098515 Sat, 23 Oct 2010 18:10:55 +0100 4098515 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4097867&cid=t_165154_87_f&fid=34872&url=http%3A%2F%2Fblisstree.com%2Ffeel%2Fhow-to-get-happy-at-work-at-least%2F photo via AOL Health Check out this post from Amy Capetta on AOL Health. Do you suffer from the Sunday night blues five nights a week? Shawn Achor, author of “The Happiness Advantage,” conducted his own research at Harvard University (one of the largest studies on happiness) and concluded that only 45 percent of workers surveyed were happy at their jobs — the lowest in 22 years of polling. “Depression rates today are 10 times higher than they were in 1960, and every year the age threshold of unhappiness sinks lower,” Achor told AOL Health. Immediately following the economic collapse in 2008, Achor — who has designed a “happiness course” based on his studies and has worked with Fortune 500 companies in 42 countries — was invited in to h... Healthbolt blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4097867 Fri, 22 Oct 2010 20:55:43 +0100 4097867 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4097869&cid=t_165154_87_f&fid=34872&url=http%3A%2F%2Fblisstree.com%2Ffeel%2F206044%2F Do You Only Take Risks: For the stories you’ll be able to tell afterward? (via Science Daily) Post from: BlissTree (Source: Healthbolt) Healthbolt blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4097869 Thu, 21 Oct 2010 20:26:46 +0100 4097869 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4086237&cid=t_165154_87_f&fid=34872&url=http%3A%2F%2Fblisstree.com%2Ffeel%2Fchristina-hendricks-might-be-dieting-should-we-stop-talking-about-her-curves%2F photo: WENN.com We like Christina Hendricks. Her figure’s not bad, either. But honestly, we’re glad we’re not her. Having that much constant focus on our measurements would drive us nuts, and make us unbelievably self-conscious. But when your body resembles that of the Mad Men star, it’s bound to turn some heads. That’s why we’re not totally shocked by the rumor that Ms. Hendricks has started dieting. In our opinion, she doesn’t need to, but that’s her private business. But with everyone talking about how awesomely unique her hips, butt, and boobs are by Hollywood standards (i.e. not size 0), it makes sense that eventually, even the strongest might cave to peer pressure. (Of course, if it’s not a rumor and the diet is her personal choic... Healthbolt blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4086237 Tue, 19 Oct 2010 21:18:57 +0100 4086237 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4082037&cid=t_165154_87_f&fid=34872&url=http%3A%2F%2Fblisstree.com%2Ffeel%2Fchristina-hendricks-might-be-dieting-should-we-stop-talking-about-her-curves%2F photo: WENN.com We love Christina Hendricks. And her body. But we’ve got to be honest: We’re glad we aren’t her. Having that much focus on our figure would drive us insane, and make us unbelievably self-conscious. But, yes  — when your bod is that rockin’, it’s bound to turn some heads. That’s why we aren’t totally shocked by the rumor that Christina has started dieting. No, she doesn’t need to. Yes, she looks great as she is. But with everyone talking about how awesomely unique her hips, butt, and boobs are in Hollywood, it’s only human to feel a little nervous. We suggest a shift of focus from Christina’s curves to her entire person. Last we checked, her acting skills were pretty out of the ordinary as well. Maybe if the medi... Healthbolt blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4082037 Tue, 19 Oct 2010 21:18:57 +0100 4082037 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4082040&cid=t_165154_87_f&fid=34872&url=http%3A%2F%2Fblisstree.com%2Ffeel%2Fbody-image-is-fat-talk-free-really-the-best-policy%2F If you’re not a college student, you might not know about “Fat Talk Free Week”, a campaign to boost body image that started today on at least 35 college campuses. The campaign, put on by a  sponsored by Tri Delta sororities with several campus and corporate partners, is designed to teach young women to feel good about their bodies, stop using “fat talk”, and prevent eating disorders. So what qualifies as fat talk, and why is it so important to leave it out of your lexicon? According to the Fat Talk Free Facebook page: Examples of fat talk include: “I’m so fat,” “Do I look fat in this?” “I need to lose 10 pounds” and “She’s too fat to be wearing that swimsuit.” Statements that are considered fat talk don’t necessarily have to be negative;... Healthbolt blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4082040 Mon, 18 Oct 2010 22:06:09 +0100 4082040 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4086525&cid=t_165154_151_f&fid=35818&url=http%3A%2F%2Ffeedproxy.google.com%2F%7Er%2FRecoveryIsSexycom%2F%7E3%2Fz1oRVEIjTvQ%2F Image via Wikipedia Moving from anger to forgiveness is a healing experience Adults who grew up with alcoholic parents probably have plenty to be mad about. As children, they were virtually powerless to stop the forms of abuse and neglect they often suffered. They couldn’t express their anger or outrage in a healthy manner. Instead, many either acted out their anger by getting into trouble or reacted inwardly by converting anger into shame, depression or low self-esteem. It can take years of hard work to discover how deep the wounds really go. If anger isn’t eventually dealt with responsibly, it can be a major block to personal growth. Unresolved anger is often a factor in addictive and compulsive behaviors and relapse. Holding on to old anger can cause people to avoid conf... Recovery Is Sexy.com blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4086525 Sun, 17 Oct 2010 13:25:21 +0100 4086525 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4036605&cid=t_165154_87_f&fid=34872&url=http%3A%2F%2Fblisstree.com%2Ffeel%2Fhow-to-look-and-feel-powerful%2F photo via AOL Health Check out this post from Catherine Donaldson-Evans at Lemondrop. Striking a powerful pose helps people feel and act more powerful, a new study suggests. Opening up the body and standing up straight can change hormone levels, making a person feel stronger, more confident and more willing to take risks, according to researchers at Harvard Business School. “These poses actually make you more powerful,” study author Amy C.J. Cuddy, a social psychologist at Harvard, told LiveScience. “I literally watch M.B.A. students adjust their posture as I’m telling them about the findings.” Conversely, closed postures that constrict the body inward make a person feel weaker and risk-averse. Keep reading at Lemondrop. Post from: BlissTree How to Look and ... Healthbolt blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4036605 Wed, 06 Oct 2010 17:22:26 +0100 4036605 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4031305&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F10%2F04%2Fits-all-in-your-head-living-with-chronic-illness%2F Somewhere I read that properly diagnosing a chronic illness can take from two to three years. Many of you wait even longer. In the meantime, while the doctors scratch their heads, we’re expected to be happy we’re alive. And that’s if they don’t write us off with “It’s psychological.” It took a year and three doctors before I was diagnosed with scleroderma. Just remembering what I went through during that year-from-hell gets my blood boiling and I know I was one of the lucky ones. If you are experiencing symptoms but don’t have a diagnosis yet, here are some tips that I hope will help you get through this trying time a little easier. Trust yourself. You are not crazy. Physicians have referred many people to me before they had a diagnosis, even... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4031305 Mon, 04 Oct 2010 23:11:56 +0100 4031305 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4031307&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F10%2F04%2Fproof-positive-cant-buy-me-love-but-what-about-happiness%2F “Too many people spend money they haven’t earned, to buy things they don’t want, to impress people they don’t like.” – Will Smith “What’s a soup kitchen?” – Paris Hilton Daniel Gilbert, Harvard psychologist and author of the best-selling Stumbling on Happiness, gave the keynote address at the American Psychological Association convention earlier this year. He challenged the three things he said his mother told him would make him happy: marriage, money and children. I’ve discussed the first one in talking about how, or if, relationships can make us happy. But now it is time to ask to ask the $64,000 question. Which, as it turns out, is the $75,000 question. I’ll explain… Can money make you happy? Is it true that th... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4031307 Mon, 04 Oct 2010 13:29:32 +0100 4031307 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4018217&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F09%2F30%2Fseeking-happily-ever-after-some-tips-for-singles%2F According to the U.S. Census Bureau, about 40 percent of adults were single in 2009. Researchers have found that the “single stigma” is worst for women in their mid-20’s through mid-30’s. Women 35 and older are more content with their single status and don’t complain of social pressure as much as younger singles. Michelle Cove, director and producer of the feature-length documentary, “Seeking Happily Ever After,” has just compiled a book by the same title. In between its covers, Michelle presents simple but smart steps for singles to identify their relationship needs and goals, and learns how to pursue healthier, stronger relationships. I have pulled the following suggestions from chapter four, “The Princess in Waiting.” 1. See the pri... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4018217 Thu, 30 Sep 2010 12:28:45 +0100 4018217 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=4003442&cid=t_165154_151_f&fid=35818&url=http%3A%2F%2Frecoveryissexy.com%2Fforgiveness-and-anger%2F Moving from anger to forgiveness is a healing experience Adults who grew up with alcoholic parents probably have plenty to be mad about. As children, they were virtually powerless to stop the forms of abuse and neglect they often suffered. They couldn’t express their anger or outrage in a healthy manner. Instead, many either acted out their anger by getting into trouble or reacted inwardly by converting anger into shame, depression or low self-esteem. It can take years of hard work to discover how deep the wounds really go. If anger isn’t eventually dealt with responsibly, it can be a major block to personal growth. Unresolved anger is often a factor in addictive and compulsive behaviors and relapse. Holding on to old anger can cause people to avoid conflict, procrastinate, ... Recovery Is Sexy.com blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=4003442 Mon, 27 Sep 2010 14:19:09 +0100 4003442 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3987095&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F09%2F21%2Fproof-positive-not-negatively-oriented-therapy-the-cure-for-happiness%2F “Misery loves company and our company loves misery.” –I.M. Kidding, NOT founder The happiness movement has reached epidemic proportions. It is now constantly in the news, and more blogs, journals and websites are featuring outcome studies indicating that happiness is within our grasp. Too many scientists, teachers and practitioners are pointing the way to cheerfulness. Where is it all going to end? Right here. Negatively Oriented Therapy (NOT) is specifically designed to blunt and reverse happiness. Here is an excerpt from a book we are working on that we have little or no hope of getting published. Stumbling on Misery is not likely to see the light of day. But this would be the introduction. Here are the top 10 ways to get you into, or help you maintain, a foul mood. Dwell on... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3987095 Tue, 21 Sep 2010 10:25:10 +0100 3987095 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3954509&cid=t_165154_180_f&fid=38612&url=http%3A%2F%2Ffeedproxy.google.com%2F%7Er%2Fpickthebrain%2FLYVv%2F%7E3%2FD2mSIQVqFV0%2F It is true that a lot of people want to lose weight for health reasons, but it is also true that one of the primary reasons that makes people think of their weight is because they want to look good. This is certainly acceptable because what we look outside greatly affects how we feel about ourselves inside. People who are leaner receive compliments from family and friends and this improves their self-esteem in one way or another. Fat (overweight) people on the other hand are even criticized for being fat and this has a negative impact on their self-esteem and sometimes it may even cause depression. An overweight or obese person could even hear hurtful words like “you are ugly”, “we don’t have your size”, and “you’ll die young” which could pull their self-esteem to the groun... PickTheBrain | Motivation and Self Improvement blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3954509 Fri, 10 Sep 2010 04:38:37 +0100 3954509 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3946723&cid=t_165154_180_f&fid=38619&url=http%3A%2F%2Ffeedproxy.google.com%2F%7Er%2FALifeCoachsBlog%2F%7E3%2FKaRB5FW1mdM%2F When I decided to trial my weekend ‘any other business’ posts I decided to throw them open to guest posts too. Shortly after I received an e-mail from Cathy Dean from  Colour Your Thinking with the post you are about to read suggesting it may be suitable. Unfortunately it isn’t, because this is the kind of post that shouldn’t be treated lightly or buried on low traffic days, because even though Cathy is self-effacing and pokes fun at herself the issue itself is an important one and deserves as much exposure as possible. Before you high tail it at the end, if you have read How To Be Rich and Happy I have set up a very short 6 question survey and I would love your thoughts. We are considering having the audio version produced and really want as much feedback as possi... Life Coach Blog: The Discomfort Zone : blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3946723 Wed, 08 Sep 2010 12:44:19 +0100 3946723 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3920795&cid=t_165154_87_f&fid=34872&url=http%3A%2F%2Fblisstree.com%2Ffeel%2Fold-folks-love-bashing-young-folks%2F photo: Thinkstock Every time your elderly parents or grandparents shake their heads in disapproval at today’s youth, don’t feel badly for them. The old crones actually like it. Apparently, German researchers claim that the old bats enjoy reading negative news about us confounded whippersnappers, because it makes them feel good about themselves. We could’ve figured this one out on our own if we’d just been counting the number of times we’ve heard Nana and Pop tell stories starting with, “In my day, young people never…” via MSNBC Today Post from: BlissTree Old Folks Love Bashing Young Folks (Source: Healthbolt) Healthbolt blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3920795 Tue, 31 Aug 2010 15:20:03 +0100 3920795 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3915071&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F08%2F30%2Fnarcissistic-college-students-spend-more-time-on-facebook%2F It probably comes as little surprise to anyone, but a small exploratory study done on 100 college students from a single university suggests that students who score higher on a test of narcissism also spent more time checking and updating their Facebook profile. Facebook is currently the world’s largest social network, with over 500 million users. More than 50% of Facebook’s active users log on to Facebook in any given day, while the average user has 130 social connections (what Facebook calls “friends”). The researcher (Mehdizadeh, 2010) also examined the relationship between narcissism and self-esteem, as well as gender differences in how people use Facebook for self-promotion. “Self-promotion,” according to how it was used in this study, was defined a... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3915071 Mon, 30 Aug 2010 12:50:52 +0100 3915071 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3889270&cid=t_165154_136_f&fid=36032&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.everydayhealth.com%2Fblog%2Flife-with-breast-cancer%2Fdealing-with-the-scars-from-breast-cancer%2F Recently I was invited to do a guest blog on a site that produces and sells cream for people dealing with the effects of radiation treatment on their skin, including to the breast area. They provide a blog and tip site that provides encouragement to survivors of all kinds of disease; they just happened to find my blog and thought I would be a good fit. I am often asked to write guest blogs for other sites. I love these invitations because I get to find out about efforts towards breast cancer awareness and research. I also find all sorts of new resources. I don’t endorse any products and generally no one asks me to. If I have written about a specific product or company, it is because somehow these organizations provide support to breast cancer research and survivors. I found out that Jean... Life with Breast Cancer blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3889270 Fri, 20 Aug 2010 19:34:58 +0100 3889270 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3866984&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F08%2F14%2Fsurviving-domestic-abuse%2F Today I have the honor of interviewing a woman who is a survivor in all meanings of that word. Kathy Lockhart is a professional Registered Nurse with a Master’s Degree in Psychiatric Nursing from the University of Virginia and a Master’s Degree in Public Administration from California State University, East Bay. She became interested in Domestic Violence after being in an abusive relationship. She has been an active volunteer for a community Domestic Violence and Rape Crisis Hotline for the past 14 years and is an advocate for victims of domestic violence and rape. She knows Domestic Violence can happen to anyone. She is a living example of how women can break free from abuse and live a meaningful life. When a young woman who has been beaten by her husband calls your hotline a... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3866984 Sat, 14 Aug 2010 11:00:12 +0100 3866984 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3808664&cid=t_165154_87_f&fid=39187&url=http%3A%2F%2Fgetbetterhealth.com%2Fthe-choice-of-taking-tests-in-life%2F2010.08.01 Do you remember the visceral sensations of angst over an upcoming final exam? Or the first procedure as an independent doctor? A major presentation, perhaps? Life’s exams test not only specific knowledge and skill, but one’s self esteem as well. And it’s the self esteem portion that creates the stomach churn, the palpitations, and the random thoughts of doom. The future lurks over you for weeks, like a weighty backpack, or the possibility of encountering the bully on your walk home from elementary school. (For my bony self, her name was Marilyn.) (more…) *This blog post was originally published at Dr John M* (Source: Better Health) Better Health blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3808664 Mon, 02 Aug 2010 03:10:14 +0100 3808664 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3798754&cid=t_165154_136_f&fid=36032&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.everydayhealth.com%2Fblog%2Flife-with-breast-cancer%2Fgetting-the-best-breasts-possible%2F I had a great doctor’s appointment last week. I got to tell my plastic surgeon how I wanted my redesigned breasts to look. Dr. Studinger is an amazing, patient, and understanding doctor. She is really skilled in the DIEP flap breast reconstruction procedure and committed to helping me get the best possible results from the touch-ups I want. Although I had two surgeries to reconstruct my breasts, I still need to finalize the shape and size of my breasts; one breast is a little bigger than the other. This is in part because one breast was reconstructed from a prophylactic mastectomy, while the other was removed with cancer and my surgeon did not want to leave much skin that could harbor cancer cells. One thing Dr. Studinger reviewed with me the fact that under law, insurance is required to... Life with Breast Cancer blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3798754 Wed, 28 Jul 2010 20:25:37 +0100 3798754 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3776439&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F07%2F21%2F4-steps-to-free-yourself-from-limiting-beliefs%2F Psychologist and mental health blogger Elisha Goldstein quotes a favorite author of mine, Don Miguel Ruiz, in his post “4 Steps to Getting Free from Limiting Beliefs”: “You see everything is about belief, whatever we believe rules our existence, rules our life.” I’ve been using Ruiz’s book, “The Four Agreements,” to help me process the beliefs of others, especially toward me (i.e. “people who struggle from depression are lazy”). But Elisha is right when he explains that the beliefs we hold about ourselves are just as disabling and disempowering as the ones other folks hold about us. He writes: Of course, whatever we believe colors the lenses of how we see the world and our very next interaction. If we believe we can’t give t... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3776439 Wed, 21 Jul 2010 13:58:24 +0100 3776439 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3743555&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F07%2F11%2Fwhy-suicide-an-interview-with-eric-marcus%2F Today I have the pleasure of interviewing New York Times bestselling author Eric Marcus on the important topic of suicide. Eric is the author of several books, including “Is It A Choice?, Making Gay History,” and “Together Forever.” He is also co-author of “Breaking the Surface,” the #1 New York Times bestselling autobiography of Olympic diving champion Greg Louganis. For more information, please visit: www.ericmarcus.com and www.whysuicidebook.com. Question: Why did you write “Why Suicide?” Eric: When I started work on the original edition of “Why Suicide?” in 1987, I knew that I wanted to write the kind of book that I wish had been available to my mother when my father killed himself in 1970 so she would have known what to say a... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3743555 Sun, 11 Jul 2010 12:29:28 +0100 3743555 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3733249&cid=t_165154_136_f&fid=36032&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.everydayhealth.com%2Fblog%2Flife-with-breast-cancer%2Fempowered-to-decide-for-breast-reconstruction-or-against%2F Surgery for my touch-up breast reconstruction is planned for August, so I am scheduled to see the doctor in a few weeks to discuss the changes I want. This surgery is exciting to me, but I waited a long time to have it. I had the original DIEP flap surgery in 2006, then the follow-up in March 2007 — since then I haven’t had any additional work, cosmetic or otherwise, on my breasts. When you take into account the fact that it took me almost 13 years to grow the first set, it doesn’t seem like this new set is really taking that long to perfect. Breast cancer survivors get to do what a lot of women wish they could — get a new set of designer boobs. It is a hollow triumph, really, when you realize what we had to go through to earn them. But if you can get past the horror of the dia... Life with Breast Cancer blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3733249 Wed, 07 Jul 2010 16:00:16 +0100 3733249 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3714394&cid=t_165154_136_f&fid=36032&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.everydayhealth.com%2Fblog%2Flife-with-breast-cancer%2Fbreast-obsessed-after-breast-cancer%2F I have become a boob person. I am obsessed with breasts! I catch myself staring at women’s chests all the time. It is easy to find a pair to look at these days, with all the skimpy summer tops and t-shirts exposing cleavage. I wasn’t always like this. Before I had breast cancer, boobs weren’t a big deal. After my mastectomy, my interest began to grow, and I became fully obsessed while I was deciding on reconstruction. The only other time I developed a minor obsession was when I was 13 years old and my first set wasn’t growing as fast as those of my classmates. This is also similar to when I was bald during chemotherapy and I became obsessed with hair, especially blonde hair. Fortunately, I have more to do in my life than stare at women’s bodies, but when the opportunity arise... Life with Breast Cancer blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3714394 Wed, 30 Jun 2010 17:54:49 +0100 3714394 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3702982&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F06%2F27%2Fstrong-at-the-broken-places-on-living-bravely-with-chronic-illness%2F I love this man. Richard Cohen. I love him. His mantra is mine. His hope I cling to. He inspires me. He tells the story of coping with his multiple sclerosis and colon cancer in his New York Times bestseller, “Blindsided: Lifting a Life Above Illness.” Awhile back, he came out with a fascinating book, “Strong at the Broken Places: Voices of Illness, a Chorus of Hope,” profiling five brave persons battling illness. Writes Richard, “These are the faces of illness in America. Do not look away. The characters may surprise you, even shatter a stereotype or two. They are people, not cases, survivors, not victims. Quite simply, they are us. they carry shared resolve, a determination to survive. To flourish.” I read parts of the book two years ago. I was especi... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3702982 Sun, 27 Jun 2010 19:27:10 +0100 3702982 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3701711&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F06%2F26%2Fif-i-stumble-if-i-fall-5-tips-when-failing%2F As a toddler, we learn to walk not by walking, but by falling. We push ourselves up, we take a few tentative steps, then we fall down. Some might say we fail, over and over again. But a parent looks at their baby trying to walk and thinks, “Look at her trying to walk! She’s doing so good. Look, she made it three steps further this time.” No matter what you call it, learning something new involves taking risks and risking failure. Not just once, but over and over again. It is something that we’re born into — it’s not something we choose. Of course some of us learn more easily than others. But for most of us, it’s a hard, sometimes trying process. It may result in failure time and time again, just like a little toddler learning to walk. But unlike th... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3701711 Sat, 26 Jun 2010 11:43:30 +0100 3701711 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3690894&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F06%2F23%2F18-ways-to-manage-stress%2F In her insightful book, “The Superstress Solution,” Roberta Lee, M.D. assesses the stress level in most homes today, and offers a word of caution about chronic stress. In her introduction, she writes: We’re deluding ourselves if we think that we can indefinitely endure the macro stresses that accompany impersonal encounters, less sleep, more work, less leisure, raising kids in this dangerous world, bad marriages, less exercise, junk and processed foods eaten on the run, hyper-caffeinated and sugar-saturated beverages, addictive devices that give us “screen sickness,” traffic jams, flight delays, and so much more, and come away unscathed. Stress isn’t all, bad, of course. In fact, like dark chocolate, small chunks here and there can be good for you, or a... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3690894 Wed, 23 Jun 2010 17:19:43 +0100 3690894 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3666020&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F06%2F16%2Fif-you-build-it-he-will-come-on-pursuing-our-dreams%2F “If you build it, he will come” is the famous line in the classic 1989 flick, “Field of Dreams.” When Iowa corn farmer Ray Kinsella (Kevin Costner) starts hearing voices to build a baseball diamond in his fields — sacrificing all the income from his crop — everyone thinks he’s gone mad. He has. Sort of. But then he sees Shoeless Joe Jackson (Ray Liotta) on the field, and the details begin to fall into place. It’s funny how you pick up different things in a movie depending on where you are in life. The movie came out just as I was graduating from high school and figuring out how to live my life sober. My vision was very black and white then. It has to be in the early days of sobriety, or else you’ll end up drunk. So I remember the &#8220... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3666020 Wed, 16 Jun 2010 11:29:10 +0100 3666020 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3652469&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F06%2F11%2Fbest-of-our-blogs-june-11-2010%2F There’s a side of us that we want to keep from the rest of the world. We put our best face forward while hiding the parts of ourselves we deem too unlovable to reveal to outsiders. Sometimes we do it out of fear of being rejected and other times we do it out of habit. For example, can you count the number of times today when someone asked how you were doing and you automatically answered “fine” even when you didn’t feel that way? Maybe it’s our society that values doing so or maybe we don’t believe that others can hold our own truth. We all have hidden our true selves at one time or another, yet I can’t help but wonder at what expense? Being honest about who we are and what situation we are in good or bad, may have a positive effect on others as we... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3652469 Fri, 11 Jun 2010 10:00:13 +0100 3652469 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3648599&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F06%2F10%2Fhow-do-you-heal-loneliness%2F If I had to name the most common complaint I hear among people with depression, it is that they are lonely. Just a little while back, I replied on a thread within Group Beyond Blue to a woman who started a thread called “Who Do I Turn To?” She wants so badly to connect with another woman — as the anchors in her life, her mother and friends, have either passed on or moved. So many of us are lonely. It is at the core of so many disorders and illnesses. Not just the imaginary ones made up in our psyches (or so many think), but heart disease and immunity functions and nervous system disorders. Many of our health issues in this country stem from loneliness. In his PsychCentral blog entry, “Loneliness Is Not a DSM-5 Disorder, But It Still Hurts,” Psychiatrist Ron Pi... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3648599 Thu, 10 Jun 2010 10:05:27 +0100 3648599 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3633500&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F06%2F06%2Fthe-second-agreement-dont-take-anything-personally%2F Don’t take anything personally. That’s the second agreement of Don Miguel Ruiz’s classic, “The Four Agreements.” I need a reminder today. So I open his book to that chapter and read: Whatever happens around you, don’t take it personally… Nothing other people do is because of you. It is because of themselves. All people live in their own dream, in their own mind; they are in a completely different world from the one we live in. When we take something personally, we make the assumption that they know what is in our world, and we try to impose our world on their world. Even when a situation seems so personal, even if others insult you directly, it has nothing to do with you. What they say, what they do, and the opinions they give are according to the ... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3633500 Sun, 06 Jun 2010 10:35:01 +0100 3633500 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3632301&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F06%2F05%2F12-ways-to-beat-addiction%2F By far my most popular post is the gallery, “12 Depression Busters.” But those suggestions were actually a response to Beyond Blue reader Peg’s query on how to stop smoking. They absolutely do help a person fight depression and the ongoing war against negative thoughts; however they were designed as techniques to use when getting pulled into addictive behaviors. The last month or so I have used every single one of these. And I’m happy to report that I actually feel a lot freer from insidious, destructive behavior than I did several weeks ago. Here they are: 12 Addiction Zappers. They work! 1. Get Some Buddies It works for Girl Scouts, depressives, and addicts of all kinds. I remember having to wake up my buddy to go pee in the middle of the night at Girl Scout camp... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3632301 Sat, 05 Jun 2010 10:30:38 +0100 3632301 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3610370&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F05%2F29%2F8-ways-to-overcome-jealousy-and-envy-2%2F I know that the fastest way to despair is by comparing one’s insides with another’s outsides, and that Max Ehrmann, the author of the classic poem “Desiderata,” was absolutely correct when he said that if you compare yourself with others you become either vain or bitter. Or, as Helen Keller put it: “Instead of comparing our lot with that of those who are more fortunate than we are, we should compare it with the lot of the great majority of our fellow men. It then appears that we are among the privileged.” But Helen and Max don’t keep me from going to the land of comparisons and envy. Before long, I’m salivating over someone else’s book contract, or blog traffic numbers, or “Today Show” appearance. Then I have to pull out my ... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3610370 Sat, 29 May 2010 13:18:01 +0100 3610370 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3617797&cid=t_165154_87_f&fid=34872&url=http%3A%2F%2Fblisstree.com%2Ffeel%2Ffitness-work-out-in-nature-and-boost-your-self-esteem%2F photo: Thinkstock Working out is easier than ever before with cardio machines, workout videos, weight lifting machines, online tutorials, and podcasts. But ditching the comfort of exercising in a controlled environment like your house or the gym could give you some extra health-related perks. A new study shows that even just five minutes of outdoor activity can improve your mental health by boosting your mood and self esteem. Data from 1,252 people (taken from 10 existing studies) was analyzed – participants were different ages, genders, and had different mental health statuses; and researchers considered outdoor activities including gardening, fishing, and jogging. The greatest increase in well-being occurred in the young and mentally ill, but everyone in the study experienced some bene... Healthbolt blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3617797 Fri, 28 May 2010 22:03:50 +0100 3617797 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3607556&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F05%2F28%2Fnow-what-depression-at-graduation-or-any-transition%2F I read somewhere that a large number of Nobel Prize winners become depressed after receiving their honor because their sense of purpose has been taken away. They have to grieve their pre-Nobel Prize life and find a new way of being, something to get excited about that will get you out of bed in the morning. The same is true, to some extent, when you graduate. With Commencement often comes an emptiness, a sense of loss. Much joy and relief, yes. But also a “what the hell do I do now?” response. For highly sensitive persons like myself, every kind of life transition — be it graduation, a new job, a baby — comes with a few challenges and their offspring. How to gracefully maneuver between point A and point B? Like you would with any other mourning process. Because yo... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3607556 Fri, 28 May 2010 15:45:17 +0100 3607556 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3603824&cid=t_165154_136_f&fid=36032&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.everydayhealth.com%2Fblog%2Flife-with-breast-cancer%2Fmotivated-by-breast-cancer%2F Over the past few weeks, I have been writing about my need to step up and make better choices for my lifestyle. This week I am seeing some success in implementing these changes. I am in a whole new mode. I am eating better, exercising, and wearing deodorant. I am committed to keeping all three of these as part of my new improved life. The deodorant thing (which I elaborated on in my last blog) is necessary because I am exercising and it is still really hot in Michigan. The personal trainer I met with to design my gym program said the only thing that I was doing that was good was walking my dog. I came home and told this to my Jack Russell terrier, Dixie, and she has been pretty smug about it. I would like to think that at age 50 I would have eventually made the choice to be that woman who ... Life with Breast Cancer blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3603824 Wed, 26 May 2010 19:12:32 +0100 3603824 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3595902&cid=t_165154_151_f&fid=35818&url=http%3A%2F%2Ffeedproxy.google.com%2F%7Er%2FRecoveryIsSexycom%2F%7E3%2FTPZvpjATCjk%2F I know I became decidedly unsexy toward the end of my drinking. Towards the end of my drinking I was separated from my wife, I had become unemployable and the quality of my relationships, sexual and otherwise, was in decline. Living in a boarding house full of sexy people full of vitality I was isolated with low self-esteem and poor confidence. People would try to engage me in conversation and unless I had been drinking I could not return their interest or kindness. I would go to bars and needed to get a few drinks under my belt before I could relax enough to make an attempt at talking to others. Usually I would just sit at the bar and watch and envy others. Often I would get ‘normal’ with enough alcohol and then leave to seek companionship in another bar. I had become paranoid about p... Recovery Is Sexy.com blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3595902 Mon, 24 May 2010 16:18:00 +0100 3595902 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3585671&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F05%2F20%2Fneither-blame-nor-indulge%2F Andrew Solomon offers this brilliant paragraph in his classic, “The Noonday Demon” about the relationship between medication and therapy, when we should make Herculean efforts to break free from depression or rather lie listless on our beds as victims of a loathsome illness: The conflict between psychodynamic therapy and medication is ultimately a conflict on moral grounds; we tend categorically to assume that if the problem is responsive to psychotherapeutic dialogue, it is a problem you should be able to overcome with simple rigor, while a problem responsive to the ingestion of chemicals is not your fault and requires no rigor of you. It is true both that very little depression is entirely the fault of the sufferer, and that almost all depression can be ameliorated with rigo... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3585671 Thu, 20 May 2010 16:56:02 +0100 3585671 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3569900&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F05%2F17%2Fgrateful-and-depressed-you-can-be-both%2F In his book “What Happy People Know,” Dan Baker argues that you can’t be in a state of appreciation and fear, or anxiety, at the same time. “During active appreciation,” Baker writes, “the threatening messages from your amygdala [fear center of the brain] and the anxious instincts of your brainstem are cut off, suddenly and surely, from access to your brain’s neocortex, where they can fester, replicate themselves, and turn your stream of thoughts into a cold river of dread. It is a fact of neurology that the brain cannot be in a state of appreciation and a state of fear at the same time. The two states may alternate, but are mutually exclusive.” Other studies have also highlighted how gratitude can buffer you from the blues, promote optimism,... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3569900 Mon, 17 May 2010 10:05:47 +0100 3569900 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3567941&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F05%2F16%2Fface-it-6-steps-to-help-women-deal-with-aging%2F Mark Twain once wrote, “Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.” I like that. But get real. In a culture preoccupied with youth and beauty, where there has been a 114 percent increase in the number of cosmetic surgeries performed since 1997? How do women escape the judgment conferred on them every time she opens a magazine, gets online, or turns on the tube? How does she silence the menacing messages she sends herself when a new gray hair is found, or her crow’s feet grow an inch longer? Very deliberately and carefully say Vivian Diller, Ph.D and Jill Muir-Sukenick, Ph.D, both professional models turned psychologists, in their new book, “Face It: What Women Really Feel as Their Looks Change.” The authors propose a... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3567941 Sun, 16 May 2010 10:30:29 +0100 3567941 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3566781&cid=t_165154_136_f&fid=36032&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.everydayhealth.com%2Fblog%2Flife-with-breast-cancer%2Freducing-my-breast-cancer-risk-through-exercise%2F The American Cancer Society recommends that adults get at least 30 minutes of exercise five times a week to reduce the risk of developing cancer. They also tout the benefits of exercise to survivors of estrogen-positive breast cancer. Exercise is known to lower estrogen production, and it works for both post- and premenopausal women. With this in mind, I try to achieve the 30-minute goal each day by walking my Jack Russell terrier, Dixie. She is 9 years old and loves to sleep in, but boy does she love her walks. I also call it strength conditioning — she pulls so strongly on the leash that it is a real workout for me. Lately I have been considering adding a quick workout at the gym three times a week to my schedule. This will help me with the cancer risk, but I have to admit it is all ab... Life with Breast Cancer blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3566781 Fri, 14 May 2010 19:22:08 +0100 3566781 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3560282&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F05%2F13%2F10-ways-to-find-new-motivation%2F How often do you lament, “If only I were more motivated, I could get so much done and be successful”? For many of us, motivation seems hard to find. Whenever a tough project pops up or we have to do something we’ve been dreading — whether it’s stripping the wallpaper in the bedroom or collecting the year’s receipts at tax time — our motivation vanishes. Here’s an excerpt from my recent article on how to find it, keep it, and overcome the most common roadblocks along the way. 1. Assess your values. Consider whether the task at hand aligns with your values, Maynard said. To figure out your values, she suggested asking, “How do you want to see yourself in the world today?” Another way to think of this is to mull over what accomplishing the task would give you “tha... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3560282 Thu, 13 May 2010 10:05:36 +0100 3560282 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3545474&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F05%2F08%2Fmy-illness-is-not-my-identity%2F I was asked by Diana Keough of ShareWIK.com to write about the topic of living with bipolar without letting my mood disorder define me. You can get to her blog post by clicking here. “A label is a mask life wears,” writes Rachel Naomi Remen, M.D., one of the first pioneers in the mind, body, health field. “Labeling sets up an expectation of life that is often so compelling we can no longer see things as they really are. . . . In my experience, a diagnosis is an opinion and not a prediction. What would it be like if more people allowed for the presence of the unknown, and accepted the words of their medical experts in the same way? The diagnosis is cancer. What that will mean remains to be seen.” I used to think that meant that I shouldn’t call myself bipolar, ... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3545474 Sat, 08 May 2010 13:23:21 +0100 3545474 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3519503&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F04%2F30%2F7-ways-to-beat-depression-if-youre-unemployed%2F The unemployment rate today has skyrocketed to approximately 10 percent and is forecast to stay above 9.5 percent for the rest of 2010. For the first time in American history, more women are working than men because close to 80 percent of the people laid off in the recent recession were men. According to a recent study published in the “International Journal of Epidemiology,” unemployment is a major risk factor for depression, even in people without previous vulnerability. Because my husband is an architect — the housing market is dead, remember — whose work has slowed down substantially, I have an invested interest in this topic and wanted to know what I could do to help him stay physically and emotionally healthy, since, theoretically, one of us should be. Here, ... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3519503 Fri, 30 Apr 2010 16:30:00 +0100 3519503 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3508262&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34958&url=http%3A%2F%2Ffeeds.counsellingresource.com%2F%7Er%2Fpsychology-philosophy%2F%7E3%2FnD2NxgNsq9c%2F I've always wondered why some people have such a pressing desire to "see the world." Recently, I stumbled upon the work of Dr. Michael Brein, who has developed a sort of "psychology of travel."Tags: existentialism, mindful awareness, self-esteem (Source: Psychology, Philosophy and Real Life) Psychology, Philosophy and Real Life blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3508262 Tue, 27 Apr 2010 15:05:28 +0100 3508262 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3494506&cid=t_165154_136_f&fid=36032&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.everydayhealth.com%2Fblog%2Flife-with-breast-cancer%2Fmy-hair-is-back-and-so-is-my-vanity%2F Finally! After five years, my hair is back to where it was before I was diagnosed with breast cancer. When my hair first started growing back after chemotherapy, it was completely different than what I was expecting. It was dark and curly, and the texture was thicker than my ”real” hair. I didn’t mind it much, mostly because I was so grateful not to be bald anymore. It was also a novelty to have short, dark, curly hair when most of my adult life I had shoulder-length, blond, straight shiny hair. As my hair continued to grow, it lost the curliness and I had long wavy brown hair — this was a novelty for me too. I actually felt like a sexy, sultry brunette. What I didn’t feel was like myself. For a few years, I struggled with my appearance. I liked how I looked as a brunette, bu... Life with Breast Cancer blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3494506 Wed, 21 Apr 2010 18:06:34 +0100 3494506 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3490680&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F04%2F21%2Fthe-pocket-therapist-mental-health-to-go%2F Imagine a GPS navigational system that said something like this: “In approximately 30 minutes, you will run into your old boss, who will want to make you feel like a worthless pile of feces. Erect personal boundaries immediately…. I said, Get in your bubble, Woman … Are you listening? She’s approaching you on your left. Lock up all childhood tapes now (the ones that convinced you that were weak, ugly, and pathetic) and DO NOT, I said DO NOT play them for her. Remember, their messages are no longer valid. Proceed carefully. You will speak to her in approximately 3, no 2, no 1 second.” Me? I would like one of those. So I made one. In book form. You see, I am an obsessive-compulsive woman who has recorded, in her journals, 12 years of therapy sessions, 21 years ... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3490680 Wed, 21 Apr 2010 11:07:59 +0100 3490680 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3471843&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F04%2F15%2F7-ways-to-overcome-disappointment%2F “We would never learn to be brave and patient if there were only joy in the world,” wrote Helen Keller. How I wish she were wrong. Disappointments leave us with the unpleasant task of squashing, crushing, and pinching lemons to extract any and all juice. Here, then, are a few of my techniques to turn sour into sweet, to try my best to overcome disappointment. 1. Throw away the evidence Albert Einstein failed his college entrance exam. Walt Disney was fired from his first media job. Michael Jordan was cut from his high school basketball team. Get it? 2. Stay in the mud “The lotus flower blooms most beautifully from the deepest and thickest mud,” says a Buddhist proverb, just in case you thought all crap was bad. 3. Make a pearl Allow your disappointment to form a p... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3471843 Thu, 15 Apr 2010 10:06:33 +0100 3471843 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3441069&cid=t_165154_151_f&fid=35818&url=http%3A%2F%2Ffeedproxy.google.com%2F%7Er%2FRecoveryIsSexycom%2F%7E3%2FV3q18z3Hq_E%2F Codependency has become a buzzword of our time, and as with all buzzwords that acquire a certain cultural currency, the vital concepts behind it can sometimes be undermined with time. In the case of this particular buzzword, however, we cannot afford to let its meaning slip away. Codependency is one of our most destructive psychological habits, and, unfortunately, one of the most prevalent What is codependency? Contrary to what many people think, codependency does not only refer to dependent relationships that involve substance abuse. Its connotations are far broader. Someone who is codependent is one who has let another’s behavior or feelings affect them in a way that interferes with work, creativity, other relationships and personal growth. Alternately, the word codependency also... Recovery Is Sexy.com blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3441069 Sun, 04 Apr 2010 14:34:00 +0100 3441069 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3435083&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F04%2F03%2F7-strategies-to-help-you-recover-from-a-relapse%2F It’s a dreadful place. Relapse. Maybe you had hoped you’d never go there. Or maybe you stay awake fearing you will. It doesn’t matter. You don’t have to stay there for long. You’ll be on your way shortly. I prefer to use the term “set back” when I get sucked back into the Black Hole — bam! — stuck inside a brain that covets relief, any form of relief, and will do just about anything to get it. Because it’s certainly not the end of recovery. From depression or any addiction. A relapse merely gives you a new starting place. Since I’ve been struggling with this recently in my own life, I’ve laid out seven strategies to get unstuck … to recover from a relapse. 1. Listen to the right people. If you’re like me, ... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3435083 Sat, 03 Apr 2010 12:46:50 +0100 3435083 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3404094&cid=t_165154_136_f&fid=36032&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.everydayhealth.com%2Fblog%2Flife-with-breast-cancer%2Fbreasts-get-good-ratings-and-an-uncomfortable-viewer%2F Like a lot of people in America, I tuned in to watch Dancing with the Stars Monday night. It was the premiere for the new season and a new celebrity cast. It’s really fun to watch actually. Every season I notice the outfits become more risqué and the show becomes a little less family oriented. This new season is no exception. One thing that is pretty obvious, well a lot of things actually, is the women’s breasts. I don’t know if it is intentional to show the jiggle, or if it is just because breasts get good ratings. All I know is you can’t miss them.  Maybe America’ fascination with breasts is what makes losing one to breast cancer especially difficult. I don’t want to suggest that losing a body part and battling a terrifying disease as not difficult, but losing a breast real... Life with Breast Cancer blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3404094 Wed, 24 Mar 2010 21:19:08 +0100 3404094 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3398880&cid=t_165154_87_f&fid=36050&url=http%3A%2F%2Fblisstree.com%2Flive%2Fyour-kids-eq-something-else-to-worry-about%2F You feed him “smart foods.” You read to him every night. You help him with homework. When it comes to little Timmy’s IQ, you’ve got it covered. But what about his EQ? Today, CNN reports a movement to foster “emotional intelligence” (or emotional quotient, a.k.a. EQ) in budding young brains. According to Roger P. Weissberg, Professor of Psychology and Education at the University of Illinois at Chicago, developing emotional wellness not only improves social behavior, but it also makes kids smarter. Weissberg’s research shows that children who “get good emotional and social training” score 11 percentage points higher on standardized tests. Teachers at Clarendon Hills Middle School near Chicago are currently test-driving this theory by inc... Breastfeeding 1-2-3 blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3398880 Tue, 23 Mar 2010 22:38:29 +0100 3398880 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3385512&cid=t_165154_136_f&fid=36032&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.everydayhealth.com%2Fblog%2Flife-with-breast-cancer%2Fa-funny-surprise-from-breast-cancer%2F There is one positive thing that I can honestly say came out of chemotherapy. It came up with my hairdresser today when she happened to notice that I have great eyebrows. I know it sounds funny, but hey, let me have this one thing. I have always had darker and thicker eyebrows than most women, but not quite as great as Brooke Shields. I was constantly plucking and shaping them and then breast cancer hit. Chemotherapy thinned them out quite a bit, but it couldn’t quite get rid of them. After my hair grew back, my eyebrows took on a new shape – and I couldn’t be happier. So today, my hair dresser commented on how great my eyebrows looked. When I told her I did not have to pluck or shape them ever, I knew she was impressed. We suffer so much through chemotherapy. Many of us struggle wit... Life with Breast Cancer blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3385512 Fri, 19 Mar 2010 21:05:55 +0100 3385512 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3416343&cid=t_165154_151_f&fid=39090&url=http%3A%2F%2Ffeedproxy.google.com%2F%7Er%2Fhelpalcoholicfamily%2FxITS%2F%7E3%2Fa5F0zGSxXCM%2F You probably never imagined in your wildest dreams that you would be going through the daily turmoil of living with an alcoholic spouse. Your friends complain that their husbands watch too many sports on T.V. or spend too many hours on the computer. Their complaints are so trivial compared to the psychological consequences of living with an alcoholic husband or alcoholic wife. What is the main consequence? As a psychiatrist that specializes in addiction, the main psychological consequence you may suffer from living with an alcoholic spouse is the loss of your self esteem. Why? You probably feel like your alcoholic spouse treats you like a doormat. Do you put up with his/her rude, obnoxious, inconsiderate behavior? Did he/she even come home last night? You probably feel totally unappreciat... blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3416343 Fri, 19 Mar 2010 01:35:38 +0100 3416343 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3366260&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F03%2F15%2Fyou-deplete-me-10-steps-to-end-a-toxic-relationship%2F “You complete me.” You know that line, right … from Jerry McGuire? It comes right before “You had me at hello” (another puker). The completing-the-other bit nauseates me a tad because we relationship-analyzers (some with the right initials after their names and some self-declared experts who can type) like to classify that type of dialogue with a term known as “codependency.” Ideally, you shouldn’t need anyone to complete you. You should be whole going into a relationship, right? My guess is that those who feel like they are getting fixed are actually getting ripped off. That’s why they keep coming back, hoping that THIS time their partner will make the ouches go away, making them feel all sunshiny and warm inside. Instead, the ouch is ... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3366260 Mon, 15 Mar 2010 10:00:08 +0100 3366260 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3342703&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F03%2F08%2F5-tips-if-you-love-someone-with-mental-illness%2F The National Institutes of Mental Health reports that one in every four adults – approximately 57.7 million Americans – experience a mental health disorder in a given year. One in four, and that’s just the U.S.! And for every person in the world diagnosed with a mental disorder there is at least one, probably more, trying to help, cope and support that person any way they know how. Mental illness is often a family issue. Parents, siblings, spouses and extended family provide housing, care and support, emotional and financial, sometimes to the point of becoming proverbial case managers. It’s hard enough when the chronic illness is something everyone recognizes, like diabetes. It’s a whole other thing when the disease is a mental illness which is ripe for misunderstandi... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3342703 Mon, 08 Mar 2010 13:46:43 +0100 3342703 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3338253&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F03%2F05%2Fof-genetics-and-lemons%2F Eyes brimming with tears, twisting my hair intensely, I blurted out “Daddy, was I a mistake?” Slowly, he put the newspaper down on his lap (to stall for time, I’m sure). “No, darling. You were a, uh, delightful surprise.” Hmmm. Even at the tender age of 6 my olfactory system was developed enough to smell a fish. There is a 10-year age difference between my sister and me and 7 years between my brother and me. Because of that, I’m fairly confident the conversation the night of my conception did not go like this: “Ken! Send the kids to the neighbors, light the candles and hurry — I’m ovulating!” God has a sense of humor. Out of all the ovaries in the world kickin’ it at that moment, he picked hers. Since she already had two perfectly healthy, perfectly normal kid... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3338253 Fri, 05 Mar 2010 17:46:16 +0100 3338253 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3331350&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F03%2F04%2Fwhy-are-so-many-teens-depressed%2F Entertainment Tonight recently reported that TV and music star Marie Osmond’s 18-year-old son, Michael Blosil, committed suicide last Friday in Los Angeles. In his suicide note, he described a life-long battle with depression, the reason for his suicide. Osmond said Michael became depressed after she and her ex-husband, Brian Blosil, separated, and that he entered rehab in November 2007. According to suicide.org, a teen takes his or her own life every 100 minutes. Suicide is the third-leading cause of death for young people ages 15 to 24. Approximately 20 percent of teens experience depression before they reach adulthood, and between 10 to 15 percent suffer from symptoms at any one time. Only 30 percent of depressed teens are being treated for it.Some teens are more at risk for teen ... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3331350 Thu, 04 Mar 2010 12:24:54 +0100 3331350 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3327025&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F03%2F03%2Flessons-worth-learning-from-the-2010-winter-olympics%2F I suppose it’s our fault — just because everything generational usually is. Too many of our kids expect life to be easy and give up too easily when it isn’t. Too many of them are quickly discouraged by setbacks and abandon a goal rather than change their approach. Why? I told you. It’s our fault. We wanted them to believe they could do anything. We wanted them to be happy. Our resultant parenting style emphasized that trying hard was as good as achieving, that potential was worthy of praise, that stress was a bad thing, and that experiencing failure would damage self-esteem. I’m not blaming anyone here. I was party to all this too. Those of us who came of age in the 1970s and ’80s breathed the air of the human potential movement whether we were conscious of it or not. S... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3327025 Wed, 03 Mar 2010 12:45:32 +0100 3327025 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3316123&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F02%2F28%2F7-ways-to-beat-depression-after-a-divorce%2F Divorce is the second most stressful life event, preceded only by the death of a spouse. And what is stress capable of? Expediting a severe bout of depression and anxiety to your limbic system (the brain’s emotional center) if you’re not careful. Acute and chronic stress, especially, undermine both emotional and physical health. In fact, a recent study published in the Journal of Health and Social Behavior suggests that divorced or widowed people have 20 percent more chronic health conditions such as heart disease, diabetes or cancer than married people. Another study in Psychological Science claimed that a person’s happiness level drops as she approaches divorce, although there is rebounding over time if the person works at it. That’s what these 12 tips are: sugges... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3316123 Sun, 28 Feb 2010 12:01:09 +0100 3316123 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3314692&cid=t_165154_112_f&fid=34971&url=http%3A%2F%2Fdoctorandpatient.blogspot.com%2F2010%2F02%2Fi-am-sorry-your-hcg-level-is-negative.html These are the words every IVF doctor dreads having to tell their patient - and which every patient fears having to hear. There is so much hope, energy,time and money invested in an IVF cycle that when it fails, patients go to pieces. No matter how well you may have prepared yourself intellectually for the fact that not every IVF cycle succeeds, the news that this one has failed is still a major emotional blow, and it takes time to recover. The failure is often taken as a personal failure - and often reinforces the feelings of low self-esteem and inferiority which many infertile women suffer from." I cannot get pregnant in my bedroom - and couldn't even get pregnant after IVF. My body is flawed and useless. I let everyone down - my husband, my doctor and my family. I am a failure. I'll neve... The Patient's Doctor blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3314692 Sat, 27 Feb 2010 11:39:00 +0100 3314692 http://www.medworm.com/index.php?rid=3311748&cid=t_165154_109_f&fid=34750&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpsychcentral.com%2Fblog%2Farchives%2F2010%2F02%2F25%2Fbuilding-assertiveness-in-4-steps%2F All of us should insist on being treated fairly — to stand up for our rights without violating the rights of others. This means tactfully, justly and effectively expressing our preferences, needs, opinions and feelings. Psychologists call that being assertive, as distinguished from being unassertive (weak, passive, compliant, self-sacrificing) or aggressive (self-centered, inconsiderate, hostile, arrogantly demanding). Because some people want to be “nice” and “not cause trouble,” they “suffer in silence,” “turn the other cheek,” and assume nothing can be done to change their situation. The rest of us appreciate pleasant, accommodating people but whenever a nice person permits a greedy, dominant person to take advantage of him/her, the ... World of Psychology blogs http://www.medworm.com/rss/comments.php?id=3311748 Thu, 25 Feb 2010 18:29:08 +0100 3311748